|Reviews for Wand Cores|
| Boo chapter 49 . 3/19
| WitchVela chapter 49 . 3/4
this chapter weighs one down alongside the characters - well done keep writing.
| Konohamaya Uzumaki chapter 49 . 2/17
I know it's been a while since you last updated but i really hope you haven't given up on this story it is the best Harry/ Tom fic i have ever read. It focuses on their relationship while not making them seem OOC. You've totally nailed their characters which isn't easy so good job!
| Guest chapter 49 . 2/2
This is one of the best Harry potter fan fics I have ever read. You are a brilliant writer with a gift for describing human interactions. I can not tell you how much I appreciate the fact that you put your gift out for all to see. I have gained many hours of pleasurable reading time from you and look forward to what your clever little mind will think of next. I love how you altered the plot in such a way that it would be believable if it was added onto the cannon. Beautiful work ma'am! Absolutely beautiful.
| Guest chapter 49 . 1/27
I love this story so much. I've been reading for years and just reread it all to catch up and get up to speed again. I hope you'll continue writing it and finish the story, I'm eager to see how this one ends!
Thank you for being such an amazing writer, your work is great! 3
| Guest chapter 49 . 1/20
oh, the poor boys!
this is a very interesting story you've written here!
you've got me biting my nails hoping it'll all resolve well! especially for young tom (which isn't something i usually end up typing, so good on you for that)
| Chaelie chapter 49 . 1/12
Quite the cliffhanger, there. I'm interested to see how the situation resolves. I'm also curious about the little "Voldemort will never die" bit.
There's quite a few typos, such as additional words and misspellings. They were not overly detrimental, but in a few earlier chapters they did make reading a bit confusing at times. But then again, I'm sure you're aware of them, and the mistakes did seem to abate somewhat as the story went on.
The prose is very...grandiose. I do enjoy it as a whole; the language is pretty and the descriptions are unique. Sometimes, however, I do wonder if they don't go...well, a little overboard with the adjectives. Occassionally they felt somewhat redundant, and more list-like than artistic.
I truly admire how comprehensive your descriptions are. It's just that...hmm. Less can make more of an impact, sometimes. Less is more, to be cliche. I enjoy Riddle's pretentiousness, I really do, and the phrasing definitely contributes to that. But while writing is wonderful when it's descriptive, it's also wonderful when it's concise.
I would find myself skimming during the less plot-necessary portions, because I didn't -need- to read a lot of it. I don't need to read constant descriptions about how exquisite, beautiful, temptuous, alluring, and elegant Tom Riddle is (or Harry, for that matter). It's a hard thing to forget, even if you only mentioned their sexiness every once in a while. :P
...Additionally, I see very few differences between Riddle's thoughts and speeches than Harry's. Harry's PoVs are supposed to be more "blunt", according to one of your ANs, but he'll use verbose language like "pulchritudinous" and "Machiavellian" (just off the top of my head), making the diction and syntax remarkably similar to Tom's. Clever or not, I just have a hard time believing his choice of words, at times. Clever doesn't always mean imposing vernacular. There's other types of intelligence, and I think Harry's different type of clever than Tom, and I love that Tom can appreciate that. I do think you captured that with his war-instincts and social ease.
Your vocabulary is incredibly impressive, far more impressive than mine, but sometimes I do wonder if Tom (or Harry) would actually -think- these words so frequently (pretentious little git or not :P). For instance, even if I know what the "thoracic cavity" is, when in the middle of passionately kissing somebody, I have a hard time believing that anyone would really think of it like that when "chest" is just so much more readily available.
The extent of someone's vocabulary isn't always immediately present in the way they think; accessibility and circumstance play a role in their use...and in a similar fashion, a lot of these words aren't accessible to the audience. It became a tiny bit tiring, constantly reading large and unlikely words. I love looking up words while I'm reading, finding out their meanings—and in this I'm a little bit strange, I think—but at times I did grow weary.
Crap, I feel like I'm casting aspersions on things I actually feel conflicted about. Okay. I'll try to explain. I said that I love your descriptions, which is true. And then I seemed to go off on a long diatribe on a few things I didn't like: the reason I went so in depth, however, is so that I can explain -specificially- what parts I thought could, perchance, be improved (although preferences in writing, as I'm sure you know, are often largely based on personal opinion). So my appreciation is deeper than the mild annoyance I would occassionally feel.
I really hope this comes out right. Sorry, it's just, I read this all in one go, so I have a lot to say. And I really liked it, or else I wouldn't have read it so quickly, and I would not have much to say at all.
Okay, I'm going to do this one more time. I loved the interactions between Tom and Harry. They're deep, meaningful, and wonderfully dysfunctionally functional (that only makes sense with this story, but I think you'll know what I mean). Tom is witty, and I adore how he grows comfortable enough around Harry to exhibit his true intelligence and personal brand of humor. I often found myself snorting unattractively at their comebacks and manipulations.
I thought, in particular, that the ice cream scene was surreal and entertaining. They went a little overboard, which I found slightly gauche but oddly endearing. I was smiling by the time Tom finished describing sinful, lustful chocolate. And it was cute how downright appalled he was by Harry mixing vanilla with coffee. Oh no! Such a terribly inapt choice, Harry Potter.
I also thought Tom's interactions with his fathers excellently done. I got a little bit teary with both of them, to be honest. I though Harry was incredibly clever, too, with the way he manipulated the conversation. When Hornby said something along the lines of "Mr. Potter, maybe your time would be better spent on another child, there are plenty who would appreciate the attention more", I thought it was a horrible misstep...But Harry turned it into a touching moment when he countered and asked why Hornby never traded out Tom. Whoo.
I'm interested in the implications of Tom's sister, too. :D
...Although I do have a very, very mild criticism for Harry's and Tom's discourse. Now, I know that they are not in any way whatsoever normal; Tom, at least, is a prodigy. He's going to speak differently than the rest of us, especially when he realizes Harry's acceptance. Harry will probably speak more intelligently, as well, in response.
But sometimes, despite taking this into account, their interactions don't feel...natural. Their back-and-forths feels weighted down, sometimes, by long monologues and speculation. They say things that sound intelligent when the reader is skimming through, but sound terribly awkward and clumsy if you actually speak them. Their words sound exactly like their thoughts, but...when someone speaks, it tends to be more concise, and more of a quick summary than a second-by-second replay of every little thing that crosses their mind.
Especially with the extensive descriptions in between every sentence (or paragraph) that they speak, I would become very aware of the fact that I'm reading this, and these things would sound strange out loud.
...I'm not sure I'm making sense.
Anyway. I liked your speculation (although I think this I saw this in an AN?) on how Grindelwald tried to protect Dumbledore's grave from desecration. There's not much canon evidence from the books (that I'm aware of, at least), although I've read plenty of fics which speculate. While I've certainly seen fics done well for both Grindelwald loving him and not, the evidence is generally the author taking creative liberties. There's easy evidence for Dumbledore loving Grindelwald; he waited several long years of bloody war before facing him, and then left him alive in the end. But not much to prove that it wasn't one-sided.
Of course, I might argue that Grindelwald had many many years to reflect on his past while imprisoned in Nurmengard. I feel like his love for Dumbledore would be very warped (have you read "Twist of Fate"? I'm absolutely fascinated by that interpretation of Grindelwald), and that he might've denied it forever for his cause, perhaps until the very end, his respect evident only when faced with inescapable death at the hands of a madman looking for a wand. I somehow doubt he would've admitted his feelings even if Dumbledore went to visit him...
Wow I just went on a rant of speculation. If you can't tell, I am extremely excited by the canon implications. :D :D :D So exciting. Thank you for sharing that insight.
Speaking of speculation. I wonder if Dumbledore longs for socks at this age. I think the sentimentalities still work (Harry's and Dumbledore's exchange of meaningful looks) because of Legilimency, but he isn't that famous yet, is he? Not until he defeats Grindelwald. So I wonder if he'd keep getting books and flagrant books, yet.
Anywayyyyy. The expansion on the wand cores is intriguing, as is the addition to the Hallows. I do wonder how long Harry was knocked out by the stunning curse; will he be late in saving Tom? I suppose Tom's "crossroads" is fast approaching. And The Gaunt Shack! Uh ohhh. Looks like Tom's going to meet that side of the family, after all.
Thanks for posting! Sorry about all the rambling. 49 chapters. I had a lot to say. Oh! Although, did you consider putting an "underage" warning? I started reading because I assumed the relationship wouldn't start until he was at least a "wizarding" adult (17), but that turned out not to be the case. I find it...well, uncomfortable. If it becomes more than kisses before 17 I'll admittedly probably stop reading. I just...I know he's mature and all, I just. Hmmm. Would've liked the warning. (Although if I just didn't see it, then mea culpa, ignore meee...I am a terrible person)
WOW I just can't shut up. To be fair it's like 4 in the morning, I get permission to ramble when it's this early in the morning, don't I? T.T
Yeah no. Okay. I'm done for real this time. Again, thank you for posting! I enjoyed this.
And...it's not really my place, but I do wish you well with your mother and Law school.
| Cynical0range chapter 10 . 1/6
I am so so so glad that I am not the only one who finds the over usage of noncon and monster dursleys as excuses for trauma induced insanity and "going Dark" as distasteful. Cannibalism is definitely a more unique and intriguing plot device. And the scene was sufficiently horrifying and traumatizing. I applaud your morbid genius. Btw, your Tom reminds me of Hannibal Lecter. Especially with this new alternate childhood you gave him.
| Cynical0range chapter 7 . 1/6
The little narcissistic interlude at the beginning of the chapter made me lol. God, Tom is such an insufferably egotistical brat here.
| Cynical0range chapter 4 . 1/6
I am actually very impressed that you are able to switch author voices so well. I can't believe I haven't come across this fic until now. This promises to be very interesting and Ivan so excited!
| Cynical0range chapter 1 . 1/6
Is Tom's stepfather truly a pedophile or is it just his cynicism and disgust speaking? Btw, both Tom and Dumbledore come across as equally arrogant and narcissistic lol. Is dumbles gonna be a bad guy here?
| SilverStarWaters chapter 49 . 1/5
Well I found this story about three days ago- it is true that the start is a little- sloppy?- but you had warned us so I kept reading, and I am glad I did. It has both the simple love plotline and at the same time to more complex plots going on and changing. I do like how you give a reason for Toms hatred for humanity, and how he is getting over it and still be effected by it at the same time. Gotta say, Nagini is awesome but I do wish she was about a bit more. And oh no! Tom is under Moldy control! Is 'Voldemort' going to stay around like Lovegood said but Tom sort of absorbing him? We've seen at this point that he is in Tom, kinda Quirell like, but since Tom is him, but stronger I can see that happening.
| dada.zhoufova chapter 49 . 1/1
So I've started on this story, and let me say this is one of the best HP fanfictions I've ever dived into. I'm not usually especially fond of novel-ish, excruciatingly long fanfics, but this one is definitely able to keep the pace. I really love the build-up, although I'm only on chapter 19 or so. I decided to share my opinion and encourage you to finish this beauty! You are exquisite in adding that so important detail and research in a fanfic, I especially like you've added your own spells. I admire the fact that you've taken time to research for components that'd compliment JK Rowling's world. Only thing I found a little bit distracting is the amount of grammatical and stylistical errors, but that's such a minor detail a beta would fix it's basically not even worth mentioning. :) Oh god, please please please, don't abandon this just yet. This thing will only get read more in the future by newcomers and re-read by the fans. Like damn, if you finish this, I'll go and print it for myself and put it next to my Harry Potter collection. 3
| o'rammy chapter 49 . 12/31/2014
I've followed this story as a lurker for well over a year, maybe around two years, and I never stopped loving it. Now that I have an account, it's only fair for me to share some of my appreciation and criticisms.
Your characterization of Tom Riddle is, as far as I'm concerned, as flawless as a fan could hope to write. Because of the nature of your story, you're able to go substantially deeper into the more disturbing aspects of his psychopathy and narcissism than Rowling was allowed, and it gives a lot of insight into the Lord Voldemort I (we?) know and love. The way you handle Riddle's life in the Muggle world is really refreshing. Fanfic writers usually fall into a trap you cleverly avoided: little raped Riddle becomes a spoopy criminal becuz he was hurt. It is, of course, so much deeper than that and thankfully you're really rational with the handling of this topic.
But, I must admit, a questionable ethic of this story is the sexualization of Tom, who is truly too young to be comfortably explored as a sexual being. All the same, I get it. He's so damn clever and ruthless that it's difficult to even see him as a 13/14-year-old.
In a way, I dislike the way you've written Harry because it feels like you've severed the tie between WandCores!Harry and Canon!Harry. However, as I read, I did learn to respect your interpretation of his character and accept that this is a plausible route he could have gone. The slash is unavoidably unrealistic, but hey! It's a great pairing.
I won't comment too much about the plot because, well, it's kind of overwhelming to discuss such a thing on an unfinished story. By now, you've probably realized that this fic has gone on for longer than what was necessary... Oh well. As long as it's entertaining, I won't complain.
To put an end to this lengthy review, let me just reiterate: I love this story. It has been quite some time since you last updated, but I'm sure you are busy and I hope that your life will permit you the leisure time to post another chapter soon.
| readingaccount chapter 49 . 12/30/2014
Most brilliant story I have read on this site. I love your Harry and Tom. Amazing characters, plot, dialogue. You are incredibly gifted and I can't wait to read more of your writing.