NOOOOO Y DIDNT U MAKE IT AN AH...

...wow...

Hate it! A/h not monkeys!
**** ********* ***** ****!

Ha! I knew it all along! How could Holly not be!?

That was cute.

That is so crazy amazing! I never expected holly 2 b the one who was monkey! Coolest fanfic evar!(other then mine!) ;-) :-D

Seriously?! She's Monkey?!

Wasn't that ALREADY in the book? I mean, it looks like you just copied and pasted.

This was good. Much better than mine, but mine was just for sh*ts and giggles, not a contest. :) How did you come up with the name Dione?

*slams head on keyboard* ha;oeijfa;sdlgha[woifj
WHAT?! Holly's monkey? That's unusual, to say the least. Not that I have anything against monkey people, of course. Being homophobic is stuipid. Let me go into rant mode for a minute:
*rant mode initiated*
HOLLY AND ARTEMIS WERE BORN FOR EACH OHER! WAT?!
*rant mode deactivated*
Okay, glad I got that out. Now, onto the rest of my thoughts.
written, I noticed not real plot holes, save that Vinyaya died, but this is your fic, so you do whatever.
gramatical errors, as far as I can tell.
in character, I think.
This is just my opion, but I think that you did a very good job with this. 10 out of 10 for originality.

that was awesome holy carp that was an awesome fanfiction

Shame coz I like AF/HS... aww well :)

Oh man, this was awesome! So exciting, I went ape-sh*t by the end. ;)

And then I thought, silly me - monkey

I don't know much about monkeys and that's okay with me ... except, maybe; do they still bananas?

However I read this with the impression it was a romantic fic. Can you please tell me where the romance is? I can find the humor on my own, but the romance is completely lost to me. Maybe the monkeys get it?

Now for my serious and therefore banana free commentary on your writing. You did fine after you seemed to, 'get going.' If I were you, I'd seriously consider deleting the entire first paragraph as, inconsequential and therefore boring descriptive ramblings. AND as that was my "first" impression of your work, and that's what you asked for ... well, there it is.

~jsm

Holy fudge. O_O

Holly is a 'monkey'?

...

You know, that's kinda hot.

Especially her being a LEPrecon Officer.

Dee's really lucky. :P

But still, no AH? D: