Reviews for The Final Chapter
spiritofthecrane chapter 5 . 12/10/2013
I'm kinda hoping ur still taking OC's
Name: Brian Darkholme

CodeName: masquerade


Hometown:las Vegas, Nevada

Appearance: scaley skin like her grandmothers only red instead of blue. Black hair and deep yellow eyes. He changes his looks to where he had tan skin, blonde hair, and blue eyes.

Family: mystique-grandmother

Personality: He is generally very calm and friendly but
When he is angered people have often remarked that he is very much like his grandmother. He's very intellegent and quick thinking.

Power: Shapeshifting and telepathic abilitys and because of his cellar structure he will age at half the rate a normal human does. He is very flexable and skilled in hand-to-hand combat thanks to his grandmothers training

Story: he was raised mostly by his grandmother because his mutation was nearly identical to hers, save skin color. She taught him how to use his power to his advantge and was shocked to learn he could read minds. One day when his grandmother deemed him worthy she left. With no money or job he was forced to use his powers to gain money. Months after his 15th birthday the Xmen found him and propositioned him which he accepted.

Hobbies: reading, excperementing with diffrent forms, hanging out with friends.

*Acts Around Humans:belives that all humans are below mutants because of how he was raised however he is willing to give them the beifit of the doubt

*Fears: being abandond again, The dark.


*Likes: switching his forms to confuse people and Boys

*Dislikes: people bad mouthing his family behind back or to his face, being alone.
Stormysongbird chapter 5 . 8/15/2011
Aww I've said it so many times but I'll say it again. What a cute couple! Shame the date got crashed. Now to find out who that mysterious woman is. Keep it up!

Coin of Light and Darkness chapter 1 . 4/18/2011
Name: Luna Raven Sky

Code Name: Moonshine/Nightmare Moon

Age: 11

Hometown: Beverly Hills, America

Good Appearance: Green eyes, teal-blue hair, wavy with a curly bang hanging in the middle of her forehead and the left part of it reaches to her armpit in a curl and the right part reaches her shoulder. Has a purple-lavender unicorn’s horn in the centre of her forehead and purple-lavender Pegasus wings on her back and a crescent moon mark on a dark blue background on her left cheek.

Bad Appearance: Green eyes, long magically flowing, sparkly indigo hair, her horn is black and longer and she has bigger black Pegasus wings on her back, is taller as well and her cheek mark remains the same.

Pets: White horse-Celestia

Family: All dead, had an older sister and parents, who died defending her, saying she had a gift, her powers made her special.

Evil Personality: As Nightmare Moon, she was vengeful, condescending, jealous, and angry. She tells her fellow X-Men that these negative feelings turned her into Nightmare Moon in the first place.

Good Personality: As Luna, she seems much more soft-spoken and gentle, and full of regret over her actions. The X-Men known little about her personality in her true form, but she seems sad and remorseful when she appears to apologize. When they present her with a wreath of flowers, she seems very touched and happy. She is known to have extraordinary knowledge in Astronomy and often dozes in the day as night is her time to shine. Once she opens up the others see that she is bright and energetic yet can be shy, she is most talkative around night. She loves playing pranks, especially on April Fool’s Day and shows kindness and consideration for others. She can also have a tough time forgiving herself but she will once she learns that it wasn’t directly her fault.

Power: To transform into a unicorn Pegasus and create stars and moonlight. As a human, she can turn invisible and can use her wings to fly and her horn to create very powerful magic. Her horn makes her an adept long-range fighter in both forms and her wings give her great mobility. She is also able to communicate with every kind of horse. She uses the moonlight to teleport short distances and to blind opponents.

As Nightmare Moon, she is able to take on the form of objects and other characters, among them mist, thorns, and a trio of mutants who present themselves as The Shadows and well as having her original powers.

Story: She lived with her wealthy parents and older sister, whom she adored. When she was found out to be a mutant her family protected her, saying that they were proud to have a mutant in the family, she was special and was to be encouraged in using her powers but not everyone agreed and her family was killed trying to protect her. She flew away and tried to use her powers for good but people shunned her. She became jealous of normal humans and very bitter towards them, these feeling turned her into Nightmare Moon and she was found by the Brotherhood, who took her in. She fought against the X-Men, who doing some background research, found out what happened and used the memories of her family to turn her back into Luna. She hid herself away for a while before going to the X-Men and apologizing for what she’d done and asked to join them.

Acts around Humans: Once she hated them because of what they did to her family and them shunning her when she tried to make friends and as Nightmare Moon, she sought to destroy them. As Moonshine/Luna, she accepts that she is different from them and takes her parents and sisters view, they are forever normal and ordinary and she is special and so she will use her powers for good, to protect them and to help create beautiful nights for them to enjoy.

Hobbies: Piano, creating stars, flying at night, dozing in the day, practicing magic, riding Celestia and has a soft and sweet singing voice.
Stormysongbird chapter 4 . 4/17/2011
Hey your back! I love the new chapter you really coordinated that fight scene very well. Mark seems to be doing well at the institute and I hope his date with Jake turns out better than I think it will.

mew-serene chapter 4 . 4/8/2011
Well, if you need villains. You can make my OC one. Nice chapter, I know how life gets in the way. Update soon. :D
Mew Phong chapter 4 . 4/8/2011
Awwwwwwww Kitchie and Mark are so cute! XD yay! Teachers? I'll send you one later! XDD gret job!
Goldrusher chapter 4 . 4/8/2011
Oh wow, this was awesome. Jake and Mark are cute. Loved it, alot, the battle scene was exciting,
mew-serene chapter 3 . 2/28/2011
Name: Sasha celera

CodeName: Ghosty


Hometown: New York, America

Appearance: Snowy white skinned and a skinny body. Sasha have silvery white hair that reach mid-back with bangs that she sometimes clip back when she pull her hair into a ponytail. Her face is framed by black blue eyes, sky clear and empty of emotions.

Family: Her twin sister that died at the age of 11

Personality: Rude and cold. She hate humans due to her past and don't easily trust mutants. She can be very active around someone who understand her feelings and what she suffered. Her powers are the joy of her life as well as her true friends. Can be cold and heartless when needed.

Power: She can turn to a ghost what gives her the ability to : Fly, send high possessive blasts walk through solid things, invisibility, and she can posses people. In her normal form she can contact ghosts, she is found usually speaking to her dead sister.

Story: Her parents gave her and her twin to the orphanage at the age of 6 when they discovered they were mutants. One year after they were adopted by a human man that was revealed to be a scientist working for the government to create a product to protect the military/presidents/rich people from biological weapons. Each one of his experiments was tested on the two poor girls as well as other mutants. At the age of 11, her sister's blood system failed to deal with product and she died. One year after she escaped and tried to find somewhere safe. She usually speak with her sister, making other mutants fear her and think she's weir for her weird ability.

Hobbies: Sketching a ghost she see, reading, training.

*Acts Around Humans: She absolutely hate humans and usually try to stay quiet around them fearing she would kill someone.

*Fears: Being haunted by ghosts or seeing their stories, her parents, and chemicals.

*Pets: A black cat called starlight.

*Likes: Quiet music, Japanese food, books, animals.

*Dislikes: Humans, bugs.
LoonyLuna and the WeasleyTwins chapter 1 . 1/16/2011
Name: Thea Joanne Johnson (She prefers being called Teddy and sometimes Jo)

CodeName: Crimson

Age: 15

Hometown: Liverpool, England.

Appearance: Teddy has messy brown hair that reaches a little past her shoulder. She has long bangs that cover her right eye and one purple streak on the right side of her face. Her eyes are soft green eyes that she outlines with heavy amounts of eyeliner and mascara. Teddy has olive toned skin with light freckles that go across the bridge of her nose. Teddy wears a black off the shoulder tee shirt that has no back with a big purple star in the middle, a grey lace camisole underneath, dark grey skinny jeans with slits at the knees, chains, and a white studded belt. And for footwear she wears black and purple hightop nikes.

Family: She lives with her aunt and uncle. Her parents are in the army so she rarely gets to see them. Teddy also has a calico cat named Tigger.

Personality: Teddy is understanding towards other people's feelings and tries to help them out anyway she can, yet sometimes she doesn't understand her own emotions. Teddy is quite rebellious, independent, sarcastic and carefree. She is contemptuous of the social hierarchy at her school and frequently speaks her mind without euphemism. Teddy has a strong adventurous streak and is often looking for trouble to get her adrenaline pumping. She thinks her life is boring and dull and that nothing fun will ever happen to her. Secretly she is kind and just doesn't know how to fit in properly. At times she may seem depressed and sometimes contemplates hurting herself. She can also be a little weird.

Power: Teddy has telekinesis, though it's nothing great. She can use her telekinesis to lift herself and others giving her the ability of levitation and flight. Though she isn't very strong so she can on levitate herself or inanimate objects about ten or so feet high in the air. She can also use her telekinesis to create shields and energy blasts. The shields she can create are not very strong and can be broken quite easily and the energy blasts she make are not that powerful. Teddy's powers revolve around her emotions, so if she gets over emotional then random things could just start flying everywhere. Her powers have more potential and she hopes that as she grows she will learn how to control them better.

Story: Teddy had a normal childhood and grew up with her loving and caring parents in London. When her parents were drafted into the army, Teddy was shipped of to go live with her aunt and uncle in the country. When she arrived, Teddy's attitude changed completely. She became more rebellious and punk-like. She never did like her aunt and uncle that much so she began disobeying their rules and sneaking out to go to parties with her friends. When she turned fifteen, Teddy's powers manifested and she accidentally went flying into a wall along with a chair, braking her toe. At first Teddy was frightened of her powers and isolated herself from the outside world completely, but after she learned a little control of her powers and what they truly were, Teddy saw her powers as an advantage to helping her be the independent, rebellious girl she is. Her aunt and uncle still do not know of their niece's powers and Teddy dares not tell them for both her aunt and uncle are extreme mutant haters.

Hobbies: Sneaking out, picking locks (she's become an expert due to all the times she's been locked in her room.) Going to parties. Hanging out with her friends.

*Acts Around Humans: Normal. She doesn't do anything rash and only tries to blend in with them. She has no problem with humans.

*Fears: Needles and spiders.

*Pets: Her calico cat, Tigger.

*Likes: Doing anything rebellious.

*Dislikes: Being grounded. Losing.

Feel free to make Teddy a villain. If you need anything, just PM me :)
The Mystic Owl chapter 3 . 12/6/2010
If you are still accepting OCs, then here's one. I hope you can use her!

Name: Amalie LeBeau (Ah-Ma-Lee)

Nickname: Ami (Ah-mEE)

CodeName: Bandit

Age: 16

Hometown: New Orleans, Louisiana

Appearance: Amalie has her dad's chocolate brown hair. It's wavy and reaches a little past her shoulders. Ami was so in love with her mom's white steaks, that she dyed the two strands that framed her face a light, mousy brown/blonde. She has her mother's pale white skin with a few light freckles on her cheeks and arms. She has large, almond shaped eyes that are a nice blue/grey color. She's average weight and height, but she's a little skinnier than usual (which she hates) and has defined bones.

Family: Her mother was Anna Marie "Rogue" and her father was Remy LeBeau. She was an only child.

Personality: For first things, she's sarcastic. Ami definitely has charisma and charm (Just like her father) She could talk herself right out of trouble. She walks confidently on the line of the law, but she knows when to stop and where to draw the line. Her heart has always been in the right place. Generally, Ami is fairly silly or at least laid-back about things. She likes to joke with and poke fun at her fellow teammates, kick back with a deck of cards and a book. She has a temper that has gotten her into trouble or put her on bad terms with others. She goes headfirst into a fight without thinking of the consequences beforehand.

Power: Superhuman agility and flexibility, Superhuman senses, Superhuman reflexes, and skilled at fighting and using the bo-staff (Her father taught her)

Story: Ami was raised close to the institute and knew all of the original x-men very well. When her parents died, she went on a "personal journey" and took some time off away from the institute, spending a few months in Massachusetts. Ami came back and is ready to learn more things, but she often thinks what it would be like if she joined the other side or continuing her fathers work by becoming a member of the thieves guild.

Hobbies: Hanging out with friends, sneaking out and around, stealing (she is Remy's kid after all), and cooking.

*Acts Around Humans: Usually she's calm and cool around them, not really caring what they do, but if someone pisses her off then it's possible that she could yell at or even attack depending on the human's behavior.

*Fears: Hospitals, needles, drowning

*Pets: None.

*Likes: Playing poker, stealing, day-dreaming, reading, listening to music, fixing up old cars, video games.

*Dislikes: Mean people, creeps, spiders, human stupidity, Rudeness.

If you have anymore questions, feel free to PM me! Also this is a really awesome story and I'm excited to read more!
Mew Phong chapter 3 . 11/21/2010
oh my gosh, i love oc storys i use this oc in my story too,dose it matter?(if it does then i can just create a new one) i hope not please use her.

Name:Terra long

doesn't tell people what her first name is is always called long. Only the teachers know that her first name is Terra and they don't call her that.

Gender: female

B/T: A

Height: 5"4

Weight: 108 lbs

Age: 15 six months and fourteen days.

Eye Color: brown somtimes hazel depends on light

Hair Color: has long dark brown has natural streaks of red in it.

Ethnicity: Canadian

Family: mother, father , one older brother and a dog

Body Shape: slim but althletic.

Always wears a trenchcoat to hide her wepons. Under the trench coat she will usually wear black or grey never wears skirts or dresses.

Personality: ruthless,




icey demenor,



, stubborn,

regards rules as useless.

Can kill without blinking but hates killing.

If she doesn't like you she makes it known.


Likes to be in charge.

A bit vain.

Tries to see things from all points of view.

On xmen side.

Will insult you eaisely.

If she names you either your real name or one she gives you she see's you as dangerous, usefull or a complete pain on the but

cuts people off because she knows what theyll say

Background: ran away when she found out she was a mutant in fear of being outcasted by her familey.

Lived in the forest surviving on the land

had a happy life before found out she was a mutant.

Normal upbringing, was a nice quite girl before running away.

Basically she brought the new personality on herself because of her choices.

Powers: senses things.

Has a limited physcic ability almost , limited ability to see future(dosnt have visions just knows things when she thinks of them).

Good hearing,


sense of smell

terrible taste buds.

A very good leader but amazingly rude.

good with guns, knifes and swords.

Can make it so she can resiest mental attacks.

(has two wepons that are pretty much a very sharp blade shaped like a dimand on eather side of a strong yet flimsy price of metal like rope each has different lengths, amazing with those wepons works them expertly and fast.) her mutant powers she doesn't find usefull so she tries to perfect useing her wepons.

Doesn't like useing her "blades" (she refers to her knifes swords and the dimand like things her blades) to kill things because she keeps he blades so prefers to save them for important kills. If it is an insignificant kill she will use her bullets as she doesn't keep them.

Code name:dosent have one (mostly because i cant come up with one. you can make one if you want)

Rivals: if she see's anyone with a potential to being dangerous and their not on her side they are her enimies not her rivals. She hates personal disputes, finds them pointless and weak.

Friends: respects x23 and storm. Does not admit to having friends. If you are usefull to her you are her ally.

Hates: people who stabb you in the back. Can't stand them. Foolishness. If you try to attack her soilders or allys. Parents who abandon their children,( if you die and you have children she counts that as abandoning)

Likes: wepons has twenty three on her body at most times doesn't get that you don't need that many. Being in charge. Loyal subordinites. Suprisingly kids, and babies.

Dislikes: over half the xmen including wolverine Jean Evan Tabitha and many more.


Bright colours.

Winter and summer and fall.

Weaknesses: normal human weaknesses but she's harder to admit that she has the same weaknesses tries to think that she can't get hurt or die but she's wrong.
Caim LeBeau chapter 3 . 8/31/2010
Your story was so cool! I feel bad for Mark 'cause of what his dad did. And that Quinn girl was a bitch to him... I really like your story :D And I was wondering if I could give you a character...

Name: Caim Reglin

CodeName: Ink

Age: 16

Hometown: New York, New York

Appearance: black hair that falls to his jawline, soft brown eyes, pale skin. Skinny. 5'8. always wears a black sweater and black gloves.

Tatoos: large eagle across his chest. ball of fire on his right shoulder. lion across his upper back. tiger on his lower back. snake around his right wrist. scorpion around his left wrist. storm cloud on his left shoulder. sword running down his right forearm. poisonous gas symbol on his right palm. the hospital cross thing on his left palm. a large black spot representing darkness on the back of his neck. a torch on his left forearm. a large light spot representing light on his small of his back.

Family: mother - in New York

father - in prison

little sister - in New York

Personality: really quiet, really shy. Rarely talks. Doesn't go out of his way to be with people but he won't completely shun them if they try to talk to him. When he talks he's really quiet. He likes to sit around with his guitar or his iPod and draw or read outside. He doesn't like staying inside much and he likes finding trees he can climb. He's extrememly intelligent. Kind to people. Rarely gets angry. He likes animals but is too afraid to have his own pet because he wouldn't want to hurt it

Power: he has 13 tatoos all over his body and he can make them come to life

Story: He was 13 when he was walking home one day when two guys from school jumped him. they tried beating him with a baseball bat but then Caim's powers came out. The lion from his back attaked one boy and the eagle from his chest attacked the other. Caim fled and has been traveling across the US since, doing odd jobs to gain minimal money to keep him going. One day he was in NYC, badly wounded after a fight he had gotten into, and he stumbled across the Institute.

Hobbies: drawing. reading. climbing trees. listening to music. studying. playing guitar

*Acts Around Humans: he's quiet. doesn't talk. is around them for a purpous

*Fears: setting places on fire. hurting his friends. himself

*Pets: NA

*Likes: spicey food. the smell of pen ink. the outdoors. new sketchbooks. cooking

*Dislikes: loud noises. blood. chocolate.

So yeah... if you need anything else um... just ask in an NA maybe? I haven't made an account on Fanfiction yet so... Hmmm... Well great story!
hannyfish chapter 3 . 8/29/2010
Here's an OC!

Name: Haruko 'Haru' Satoshima

CodeName: Aura

Age: 17

Hometown: Tokyo, Japan.

Appearance: Long red-brown-gold hair down to her waist, identical colour eyes. About 6'2", very pale with shadows under her eyes. She tends to wear a grey kimono with short sleeves, with blue flames on the front and a dark blue dragon on the back. She has a dragon tattoo on her right arm in black and dark blue and a dragon the same colour and style across her cheeks. On her back is a tattoo of a pentagram with representations of the five elements at each point. Absolutely no shoes no matter what anyone says.


Hiraku Satoshima-Father

Akiko Satoshima-Mother

Natsuko Satoshima-Sister

Hiro Satoshima-Brother

Personality: Quiet and unsociable. She has a strong belief in the supernatural. Haru possesses a bad temper and usually if someone annoys her she can send them to hospital. She can be very defensive of her possessions

Power: She can control the elements through her five elemental spheres she keeps inside her kimono.

Story: Born in Japan into a fighting dojo, the youngest of three children, she learnt every style of fighting and her best is martial arts and kendo. She bested her siblings who had been learning for three years minimum more and five maximum more, and even defeated her father when she was 7. When she was 14, her gift became apparent and her parents were scared that she's be bullied and their reputation destroyed so they sent her to Xavier's Institute. That's the end of it.

Hobbies: Manga and anime, detective work, practicing her gift, drawing, making videos, setting up websites.

*Acts Around Humans: Keeps low. Attempts to control her temper but it usually fails and her gift is apparent.

*Fears: Death

*Pets: N/A

*Likes: Manga, anime, art, anything sweet, coffee.

*Dislikes: Mushrooms, people being stupid on purpose, anything not sweet, alcohol.

Anything else? Just ask!
CloudyNK chapter 3 . 8/26/2010
I just realizes I got Lilianas hometown wrong she's from La Paz, Bolivia not Columbia srry
The Lady Cloudy chapter 3 . 8/26/2010
Name: Liliana Perez

CodeName: Panic

Age: 16

Hometown: La Paz, Columbia

Appearance: Liliana is still very skinny from living on the streets but you can no ling count her ribs. She has warm chocolate brown eyes that become cometely black when she uses her powers. She has very tan skin which is normalconsidering where she's from and black hair that's always tied back in a ponytail. Her hair when it's down is very curly and wavy. Liliana is shirt only standing at about 5'1" and is slender.

Family: As far as she's concerned she has no family

Personality: Liliana is a tad shy but once you get to know her she's very sweet and caring. She loves winning and is easily excitable. Liliana is very free spirited and adventerous; alway curious.

Power: Liliana can send out a brainwave tht causes people to panic. depending on how long she uses her power on someone will determine the lasting effects; once she put a woman in cardiac arrest. She is also a minor illuionist and can cause people to see disasters like floods, car crashes, tornadoes, giant robots invading the earth, etc.

Story: Liliana is the daughter of two drunkard parents and was beaten a lot by her mother (she has scars on her back, stomach, arms, legs, and even one on her cheek). When her father left when she was 2 the beatings got worse until her mother tried to kill her with a kitchen knife. Liliana ran away at age 6 and lived in a catholic missionary church run by nuns. She discovered her powers at age 14 when one of the nuns beat her with a ruler, the nun went into cardiac arrest because Liliana accidently used her powers on her. For almost a year she used her powers to cause a distraction while she stole food to survive until she saw a commercial on TV about the new xmen. It took her awhile but Liliana finally made it past te boarder and to The X-Men. She showed up battered, bruised, broken, and bloody.

Hobbies: Dancing, running, track, and Copoeira.

*Acts Around Humans: She gets really shy and nervous and wears sunglasses so if he accdently uses her powers and her eyes turn black no one will know.

*Fears: Being beaten

*Pets: A little kitten she found starving. The kitten is little gray with darker gray stripes, named Niebla meaning Mist or Fog English. She changed the cats name to Mist.

*Likes: Boys, swimming, running, and fighting (for fun).

*Dislikes: Being beaten, and headaches.
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