Glad I stuck with this, you did all the reasoning of Tony leaving really well. I would delete my previous comment if I knew how. Got sucked in reading it all. Off to the sequel now

I’m gonna give this a go but starting out I really don’t understand Tony being in Spain for 2 yrs and leaving his family there or ziva not going with him. Honestly seems a weird choice.

Interesting so far. Some of the beginning was a little difficult to follow but from chapters 1-4, I get a suspicion that Eli is going to try to kidnap Tali to make a clone of Ziva. Far fetched, I know, but there are some references to a powerful man, things that are wonky about , good beginning to a fascinating case.

Loved your story. You are so talented. Can’t believe English is not your first language. Wishing you success in whatever you plan for the future!

Tony first day back with his family, and what does Gibb do, get Ziva to come into work he could of given her the day off.

Why didn't McGee just come out and say yes, Tony you made the fucking biggest mistake you ever made going to Spain what made you think it would be ok leaving Ziva to look after two kids, you prick.

While I understand the idea based on a necessary plot-developmental point, logically I cannot for the life of me understand why Tony, Ziva, Gibbs, any of them really- didn't IMMEDIATELY run to get David out of that school knowing who his teacher is. It just doesn't make sense. They just stand around trying to figure things out while David is sitting in that school with that woman. That doesn't feel right. I can't imagine ANY parent on earth doing that.

Thank you.I just read all 30 chapters and absolutely loved it.

Think 2 chapters would of been enough to describe what happened 2 weeks before Ziva's car accident, all this backwards and forward chapters are starting to get annoying, otherwise it's a very good story.

Well, Tony for having two kids you know nothing about being a father, 2 years in Spain, and in those two years did you not think about coming back to the US, Two years something must of come up where an opening for a team leader, or were you just hiding and let Ziva do all the hard work of bringing two Kids up herself, or why did you not ask Ziva to come over to Spain now that Tali is older.

I love the ending. Allusions are one of my favorite things!

This is so very fantastic. The thing that's confusing me is, how many bad guys are there? By bad guys I means guys who want to get Tony for reasons I do not yet understand.

Was having a look around fan fiction a few days ago and saw an update for your other story, noticed it was a sequel and thought i best read this one first. All i can say is every free moment i have had over the last few days i have spent reading this story. Is was a bit confusing at first getting used to the timeline changes but once i got my head around that it was plain sailing. Your story is absolutely amazing, i love how you mention little things in chapters and then later on expand on them. Your writing is stunning. Anyway enough of my rambling, i best get started on the sequel, i have a lot to catch up on lol x

Reading this story of yours has been a wild, wild ride. The case, while very convoluted, was well done. I like the fact that the bad guys were working toward revenge against the entire team and that they knew them so well. The tragedy that they had planned for Abby was absolutely the most evil part of the plot. I do think that Niv gave up too easily, but you made it very credible by casting him in essentially the same mold as Ziva.

The married life you wrote for Tony and Ziva was excellent. Nice job.

You dialog was very good. The only bad thing I can say is that some of your adjectives were either misplaced or used incorrectly. However, the story was so compelling that I slid right past them. One other thing that bothered me a bit is that you keep saying that you are writing for your audience. That may be part of it - we all want to be accepted in what we do and we want to know that others appreciate how well we do it. However, most of the writers I've known and talked to write because it gives them a means to express themselves. In other words, they cannot live well without some means of releasing their talent - they write for themselves and hope and others like it. In my opinion, reviews should not be the catalyst that moves you - your release, expression of talent, is the driver.

Thank you for writing this and for posting it. I have enjoyed it very much.

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Wow - just wow! I have not even read the chapter yet, just the reply to the anonymous review, and I am so pleased with you that I cannot wait to tell you. Your reply was splendid. I personally do not reply to anonymous reviews because I believe they are usually from a person who regularly reviews but does not want to be known to me. Anyway - you really did a great job on that reply and I wanted you to know.

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