|Reviews for Boomerang|
| dragonball256 chapter 1 . 7/25/2013
This was an interesting story, love how u included a background story for Tidus being there. Lol at Cloud liking older women ;)
| a.brief.dalliance chapter 1 . 6/23/2013
I absolutely adore this story, read it ages ago but never got around to reviewing it. Everytime the story gets better, off to read your other works now!
| Majestic-Space-Duck chapter 1 . 3/24/2012
Very good! I really enjoyed that. A fun read with a lovely ending.
| BananaPeaceMonkeyKarmi chapter 1 . 7/11/2011
This fic is so beautifully written that it made me want to cry!
I love the incorporation of Tidus and Yuna, and how it almost seems like since Cloud was gone, Tidus... took his place of sorts, and Cloud comes back, and Tidus can go back home. It's so nice, and seamlessly put in there!
No more disappearing Clouds! This is absolutely wonderful~!
| J Luc Pitard chapter 1 . 9/17/2010
Alright. You've converted me. I've even gone and watched two of the anime. This is another solid story and a romantic one on the theme of the returning hero.
| mom calling chapter 1 . 9/15/2010
'Scuze me while I pick myself up off the floor-this is THAT good! Everything about it is most excellent, and the tingly stuff is just that, a good and sentimental tingle that gives me palpitations. But I think what I love best is at the beginning. You know, I don't think I've read about Cloud getting out of that pool in the way you wrote it. The way it musta been, even if there were throngs of people around him. We've always known he'd have boots full of water, his heavy fighting clothes made heavier, he'd wipe off his face, (his hair hanging, dripping water in rivulets over his eyes) with gloveless hands-why is he always wearing those gloves? He'd be like a tidal wave coming out of the pool! And slogging, too. Of course he would have slogged! A camera-like verb that isn't often-or at all-used for this scene. You did this whole piece just right! And it coulda been like that, too. It's just as plausible as the canon-way. I love that he notices someone's been messing with his tools, but in a neat and orderly way... and later we hear that Denzel had to raise the seat! (Can one do that in a motorcycle? 'Course, Fenrir's far from standard...) Oh, this is great fun. A romping good read, well written and deliciously your own. But then, I knew that it would be-you've been vetted by the best! thx mc
| jimmycranberry chapter 1 . 8/30/2010
Nice story; it's a great plot bunny (with nasty big pointy teeth), and is fantastically written. Great work!
| DreamBeamz chapter 1 . 8/13/2010
Simply fantastic and I love the Cloud/Tidus switch. -grins- :)
| vLuna chapter 1 . 8/8/2010
Oh that was really good, very interesting and original concept :) Cloud's jealousy was hilarious xD Great job! I hope to see more Cloti stories from you.
| ffangelwing chapter 1 . 7/31/2010
I really liked the expectation to know how many time had passed, great strategy it kept me looking for details so i could decipher the numbers of years that passed until it finally was revealed.
| Nana612 chapter 1 . 7/30/2010
That was a good update soon!
| MakoHeadrush chapter 1 . 7/30/2010
Have to review this, as I'm doing a VII/X crossover too right now. Wow, you actually made me like Tidus! And feel a tad bit bad for him. I'm having trouble writing him in a favorable light, because he strikes me as a bit of a d-bag, but that's my own thing to get over. ;)
Anyway, I love what you've laid out here for a foundation, really looking forward to reading more. Great intro!
| HelloGoodbyeBlueSkys chapter 1 . 7/30/2010
First off, the praise: The plot of the story is very good and unique, great job on thinking that up.
But there are also flaws. One of the most prominent one is the excessive use of "because" and "but". To much repetition of these words weaken the artistry of the work and makes it like reading a juvenile novel. A little bit is fine, these words are sometimes absolutely needed but refrain from using them to often. Another flaw is poor adjectives. There used when not needed and then, when a good opportunity arises, poor adjectives or none at all are used. Honing oneself to use good adjecives is difficult, it takes teaching. Having a dictionary and a thesaurus available is a good start and I've found personally that my Honors English classes and poetry classes have helped more that believable. One last flaw is sentence structure. So many of them are written simply. I suggest setting sentences up in more complex ways to add interest. To provide examples I'll edit a small piece. You say:
"Tifa shakily lays her fingertips on the back of the hand caressing her face, tears forgotten, but not quite able to believe what she sees [The but here weakens it, and makes it fall short of a great sentence]. "C-Cloud...?"
"Yes." He's startled when she yanks her hands free and starts rabbit-punching him in the chest; he lets her get it out of her system because if their situations had been reversed, he'd be pretty choked,too [This sentence is very weak. It starts off good but it begins its fall with "because" and the "get it out her system" is too common of a cliche]. It hurts more than he'd like to admit, but it's okay ["But it's okay"? Totally killed it there, kid] because [if the sentence was phrased differently, the because could work here] she isn't putting as much strength into it as she could. If she was really upset, he'd be three rooms away by now, picking plaster out of his teeth [Great sentence and LOL]. Tifa stops hitting him and flattens her hands against his chest, but he manages to get his arms around her before she can push away. [But!]"
"Tifa lays shaking fingertips on top of the firm hand caressing her cheek, forgetting tears. She turns brown disbelieving eyes to blue yearning ones. "C-Cloud?" she whispers.
He begins to affirm but is taken aback when she begins to rabbit-punch him in his chest. Cloud simply took her into his arms, comforting her while stalling the punches. He knew that she actually intended to harm him he would be three rooms away picking plaster out of his teeth." [I know I changed how the scene plays out a bit but I believe that this change in sequence strengthens it ;P]
One last problem I would like to mention is not-mentioned facts. When Tidus had left to pick up the kids it was not mention until WAY later by Tifa. You totally had me baffled that Tidus (Whom I presumed was in a relationship with Tifa) would let the exchanges going on continue. Mentioning an important fact like that when it happens would help a whole bunch.
Keep working, you have the ability to be great!