|Reviews for Expecting Trouble|
| Jesco0307 chapter 7 . 1/2
I think I need to make more time reading some of your older stories :). I just "found" this one after re-reading "All the other Acronyms" and the sequel and then looking to where Lucy came from. I read a lot of different stories and like different types depending on the mood I'm in, but this type is definitely one of my favorite ones - the team really being a team, a nice case for them to solve and a (hurt) Tony as its focus point. It can't get any better than this. And I have to admit, although I like a good, strong relationship between Gibbs and Tony, the way you're portraying McGee and his relationship with Tony makes me almost happier. They still bicker, but in a friendly manner. And both Tony and Tim are allowed their moments of brilliance without the other one being portrayed as an idiot. Kudos to you for that! Everything in here is realistic and not completely over the top - the people, the case, the injuries. And your description of Polly giving birth? Seriously great work. I can totally judge that, having done it myself ;).
Thank you for sharing your work! I'll go find more fantastic stories to read :).
| engedi6k chapter 7 . 8/24/2014
Oh my. I'm wondering why in the world it took me so long to finally read this delightful story. It had it all-bad guys, mystery, evil person in power, a gutsy Tim, competent, injured, self - sacrificing Tony, brave heroine, car chase, baby delivery, even a helicopter ride tossed in for good measure. I just kept thinking how much I would live to see this played out on the show.
Another wonderful piece of writing, Scouse. Thanks as always for sharing it with us. Broke my ankle this week and I'm thinking an afternoon reading scouse-stories will be a wonderful distraction from discomfort. :)
| Brenna chapter 7 . 5/28/2013
fantastic story...thank you very much
| Hummingbird2 chapter 7 . 3/15/2013
Hey, I happen to like sappiness! ;) That was very well written, thank you.
| Aurilia chapter 7 . 8/28/2012
I think I broke something in my voicebox with the high-pitched happy noise I made at the close of this chapter.
| Aurilia chapter 6 . 8/28/2012
| Aurilia chapter 4 . 8/28/2012
YAY! Action!Tony! And gigglesnorts galore for the ending of the chapter.
| Aurilia chapter 3 . 8/28/2012
Okay, so it's a bit bigger than I'd first imagined, but still, I did get a few things right! Anyway, fascinating tale.
What's a 'belt and braces approach'?
| Aurilia chapter 2 . 8/28/2012
Ah! So, I'm at least partially right... Go me.
However, antivirals don't go for much on the black market - there isn't much call for them. You might want to edit it so that it's either opiates that've been taken or mood-altering meds (Xanax, Valium, Ritalin, etc.). Ten years ago, one tablet of Lodine could sell for twenty bucks. Xanax was seven dollars a tab, Valium went for fifteen. Tylenol 3 (contains codine) was also twenty a tab. (Please don't ask how I know this.)
| Aurilia chapter 1 . 8/28/2012
I read the whole 'Blossom' trilogy a while ago (I rarely review, I know, I know, it's horrible of me, but I either get too involved in the story, or I'm simply too tired to be coherent when reading to pen reviews most of the time), but since finding your Tony'n'Doris stories, I decided to go back through them (skimmed) when clicking into your profile after finishing Cowboy Tony. I can tell you wrote them a while ago - they're not quite as polished and riddled with Brit vocab and phrasing. Resultantly, I didn't bother voicing vocab corrections (I knew you managed to get most of the US terms already), but now that I've moved into this one, I have a couple of questions:
What on earth is a 'rotary drier'? D'ya mean a clothesline? The ones that branch out from a center pole like a sun umbrella? And is it common in the UK for them to be collapsible? I only ask because I've never seen a collapsible clothesline outside of an RV park. The umbrella-style clotheslines I've always seen in people's yards are all permanent.
What's the role of a 'Practice Nurse'? It's not a term I've ever seen before. If you can tell me what she/they do, I can give you a US equivalent (Mom was an RN for 25 years - she did everything from help out in ER to assist in surgery to running the night shift for an old folks' home, so if I don't know the exact equivalent, she will).
I know you probably know this already, but I figured it couldn't hurt to clarify; the pants she was stooping to pick up - were they what the US calls pants or were they underwear?
Other minor details (in no particular order):
washing basket laundry basket or hamper
Was this one of the stories whose section-breaks got caught in the Great Break Purge? If so, you might want to consider going back in and re-adding them. If not, then you might want to go back in and add them (I had to read the transition from Polly to our favorite federal agents twice to make sure I hadn't missed something important).
And now for my amateur sleuthing ramblings:
I'm with Gibbs'n'Tony on this one - Hank definitely knows/saw/did something that he's not telling. And if Hank didn't like the fact that Hastings was booting him out of what he considers to be a cushy posting... Hmm... Lemme see here... Hankie-boy said that Hastings and Knox argued - could be true. Well, Ziva mentioned the statements all agreed, so let's assume this is true. Okay, so... Hmm... Major distribution hub of pharmaceuticals which would fetch a fortune on the black market. Ding! We have a winner (or so I hope). Try this on for size: Hank gets the post at the distribution hub. He's got a dishonest streak and succumbs to temptation - he starts fudging the books a little to cover what he's selling on the side. One-by-one the underlings who also work there are brought in on the megamoney he's racking up. Enter Hastings, who's about to push ol' Hank out of a job. Hank approaches Knox, tells him to lure Hastings up on the balcony, his intent to either kill off Hastings or to simply get him hurt enough to justify keeping Hank in his cushy post where he can continue to cash in. The tables get flipped and Knox is the one who winds up heading over the balcony; it's pure bad luck that has him dying. Hastings gets a little freaked, either by having accidentally killed the guy (doubtful, but possible), or from realizing that Knox had intended to do an evil on his fair person - maybe Knox isn't (wasn't) the sort to initiate anything on his own, a leader, not a follower, and perhaps some of this panic is realizing that the puppeteer is a little higher up the food chain than just a PO2. So, not knowing who to trust, Hastings high-tails it out of there.
How close did I get?
Meh, I'll continue reading and find out!
| BrandSpankingNew chapter 7 . 4/11/2012
Awwww! I had a terrible shift at work and then my computer went down so I'm reading on my mobile trying to cheer myself up-and this totally did. A lovely story, and i am a sucker for a sappy, happy ending. And the mental image of Tony cuddling a newborn is the cutest thing!
| USAFChief chapter 7 . 8/25/2011
Nothing OTT for me in this, and yes, I finished with tears in my eyes. You sappy woman, you. I enjoyed this a great deal actually.
Well, my season 8 DVDs have arrived so tonight I shall begin to prepare for season 9 by watching some of them - in order.
Best to you.
| USAFChief chapter 2 . 8/25/2011
I truly enjoyed your conversation between Gibbs and Charlie Forbes. That is exactly the way I (as a retired senior NCO) speak to senior officers and the way they talk to me as well - in many cases, I trained them or at least attempted to and they, in turn, took that training to become very good commissioned officers.
| USAFChief chapter 1 . 8/25/2011
Hmmmm...an encouraging review you want, huh?
Okay, here goes...You've started off very nicely with the dialog and descriptions of the locale. I've been in many government buildings such as you've described and you're right on the money.
In the US, we don't have Practice Nurses. They may have in Canada, but not here. Pregnant women have to go to an OB-GYN clinic or a pre-natal clinic to be seen for recommendations for vitamins, exercise, and well being visits.
Unless something special catches my eye, I'll probably only review again at the end. Oh, by the way...I like your change from saloon to sedan. Although I knew exactly what you were saying, it became it bit of a distraction. On the other hand, it was a constant reminder that although our language is often different, we are all so much alike.
Thanks for posting this.
| Mezzo Beev chapter 7 . 6/25/2011
Another fine fusion of case fic, team work and whumpage! Bravo for the Probie gut and SFA gut in harmony. Tim has learned to listen to his and Tony takes it seriously. I like how you have them respecting each other.
“He smiled, a slow, mean, schadenfreude-laden snarl that his parents would have been astonished to see on their son's open, good natured face.” Loved it! Our little Timmy is being corrupted by the company he’s keeping.
To quote a famous movie character, “I don’t know nothin’ ‘bout birthin’no babies,” but what you wrote reads as very credible. But then, having just double-checked your bio, I guess you have some personal experience with the process – I mean as an adult. I love that Tony has previous experience, but of course you couldn’t simply let him deliver a baby; you had to have him do it with broken arm, ribs and internal bleeding. I thank you for that, even if he doesn’t.
I was amused by Tim offering to tell his story of punching a sweet old lady and stealing her car to distract Tony from his suffering.
I really admire your ability to provide sufficient detail to paint a clear picture but not so much detail that it bogs down the flow of the story. For example, the description of the ESCD when the team first arrived. It’s a fine line to walk and you make it look easy.
And there you go again, educating me in the British dialect of our supposedly common language.
None...would ever pull up any trees
Belt and braces approach
“Lamp” as a verb, having nothing to do with providing light – though perhaps something to do with putting out someone’s lights.
Sigh. Reading your stories is a lot like gorging on dark chocolate...without the calories.