|Reviews for Faerun Tales: The Treasure Hunters|
| APen'sSoul chapter 47 . 8/5/2012
Can't remember if I reviewed or not since your last chapter. I have a faint idea that I did. But I just loved this Bishop story and didn't really want it to end - but with short stories like these, it does have to end; Though it always appears that Bishop has emotional attachment issues and puts on a tough act in every scenario in which he finds himself, he eventually gets those three words out, in his own way, of course. Well, I look forward to reading any of your future works because you are a brilliant writer.
| apen'ssoul chapter 47 . 7/29/2012
Well done, InfamousSharo. An excellent Bishop story and the ending was superb. Your writing strikes a good balance of adventure, persaverance, danger and love. I think most of us were too ensconced in each chapter to care about mistakes. Look forward to future projects!
| Gaspode chapter 47 . 7/25/2012
Congratulations to a job well done. These last two chapters were wonderful. As always your banter is spot on, especially you capture Bishop's voice so well, his anguish when he thought Jaelyn dead felt genuine and I actually felt sorry for him. There is still that with too much description and explanation at times but what the hell.
There was plenty of good one liners too, a favourite:
"Kalandiin shrugged. "Only a fool would disobey orders from Dresmor."
"Only a fool would follow orders that aren't right." Jaelyn shot back.
"Only a fool follows orders." Bishop amended."
I do admit I'm a bit sad you won't do part two but I understand, you have to go where the muse takes you so good luck with that and thank you for sharing.
| APen'sSoul chapter 45 . 6/14/2012
So sad that this is drawing to an end! But I have enjoyed your take on a Bishop story. Fantastically written. Each chapter connects and leads into the next one perfectly. Hope your laptop gets well soon in order to spit out the final chapter.
| Gaspode chapter 42 . 3/30/2012
Oh a very nice cliffhanger there. I wonder what Dresmor is up to.
Having Bishop torture that Drow is a nice touch. Once again you capture his voice perfectly. He may have gone a touch soft when it concerns Jaelyn but he’s still the same old Bishop.
Still reading, still enjoying.
| Gaspode chapter 41 . 2/6/2012
Hm, well I doubt Bishop or Quin are going to take that lying down and I sympathise completely with what Bishop feels. Besides I can't really see how Jaelyn is going to stop them from interfering, after all she'll be busy. I wonder if she realises that she's taking a leaf from Bishop's book there by treating love and friendship as if it were a weakness, something she's fought so hard to stop Bishop from doing.
I very much liked how Bishop made Jaelyn vent her grief and anger in the previous chapter. That was nicely done.
As soon as I have time I'll go back and read your revised chapters. Sadly real life is keeping me busy.
| Gaspode chapter 39 . 1/16/2012
What can I say...Yay! At last. It always amazes me how well you capture Bishop's voice. Even when you have him do something unexpected I end up thinking; but of course he'd do that.
No further comments really. You'll no doubt be pleased to hear that I finally was told to put my money where my mouth is and am helping a writer on ff to beta and co write a story. Revenge, no doubt, is sweet. ;-)
| Gaspode chapter 38 . 1/6/2012
As always I'm having lots of fun reading this and I'm delighted at getting two updates so close together.
No doubt you'll be relieved that I actually have no constructive criticism at all to deliver.
I'm glad that Quin is getting a chance to shine and sad that Feral is gone. The rangers' ability to pick up on thoughts is an intriguing one, I could imagine it's similar to how rangers bond with their companions. Reading the scene where Jaelyn tells Bishop she loves him I couldn't help but to think of when princess Leia tells Han Solo that she loves him, just before he's dragged off by Jabba the Hutt and he replies 'I know.'
It's a nice touch that Bishop handles torture so well, I always thought he'd be trained to do so when training as an assassin. Then of course he's a stubborn bugger.
I've already done a lot of fan art of Bishop and there's more queueing. This story has lengthened the queue considerably. At this stage it'll take me years to catch up on all Bishop (and Jaelyn) art bunnies. Sigh.
| AnnikaLisbethCousland chapter 38 . 12/30/2011
Oooooh! I hope it's going to be Quin, but knowing your writing style it may be a complete twist...my bets on twist. Another amazing chapter! Look forward to 39(;
| kendallvon chapter 7 . 11/5/2011
32 degrees Celsius is very warm. I think you meant that her voice froze him to the marrow? BTW... I'm loving this. Bishop is deliciously snarky.
| Gaspode chapter 36 . 10/27/2011
Welcome back! I always look forward to the next instalment of your story. I’ll get to the boring bits first:
“...wash the former native's blood from himself and his knife” – I can’t quite put my finger on it but ‘former native’ sounds wrong, as if Akereth somehow ceased to be a native before he died. Perhaps ‘dead native’ or simply ‘Akereth’ would work although doubt Bishop would ever use the man’s name, even in his own head.
“you black-hearted monster” – I can’t help but to imagine a rather prissy looking librarian (very stereotypical) saying this. I think Jaelyn would be a little bit less polished about it, surely she can squeeze in a ‘you rotten bastard’ or something along those lines, even if she doesn’t actually swear. I’d suggest something ruder but then the censuring software on ff will spank me.
“He stared into the water, at the ruggedly handsome man staring back at him” – Somehow I can’t picture Bishop thinking of himself as ‘ruggedly handsome’, no matter what the rest of us think, and since he’s alone and observing himself, as a reader, I automatically interpret what is written there as his personal thoughts and opinions. I’m more inclined to believe Bishop is the kind of person who doesn’t like looking at himself at all since I suspect he doesn’t like the person he sees.
“She was alarmed that her feelings for him remained intact, in spite of everything he'd done. She was furious with him but she didn't hate him for it.” – You’ve basically already explained this during the kiss scene, perhaps it would be enough to just say something like ‘She was alarmed that she still had feelings for him’.
Now the next one is a matter of personal opinion so it should probably be taken with a pinch of salt.
“If he did it, it would be of his own will; it would be his decision and it would not be swayed by her or anyone else.” – Whilst I agree completely with what he thinks prior to this line I can’t help but to think Bishop doesn’t believe in change at all, or rather in his mind he is as he is and change isn’t possible. I think he’s a firm believer in that people can’t change, which in turn is why he never bother wondering if he should give it a try. Somehow I think this paragraph would have more impact if it was left at “...wasn’t going to change for any woman”.
Other than my usual nit-pickings I think this is a really good chapter. You capture Bishop’s voice so well. There’s no unnecessary explaining and everything just flows nicely. The tension between Jaelyn and Bishop is delicious.
Jaelyn’s internal monologue when she tries to escape is excellent. It’s everything in a nutshell and has the more impact for it's simplicity.
| Gaspode chapter 34 . 8/22/2011
The mechanical poisonous spider is a very nice idea. Horrific in a gothic kind of way and very apt. Of course anybody but Bishop would have gone straight back to Jaelyn and told her everything, letting her decide how to deal with the trap. It would have been the logical thing to do and with any other character, what Bishop does wouldn’t have made sense. With him, however, it sadly does.
Now I do have a few bits of ‘constructive criticism’ but please don’t get me wrong. I love this story and am looking forward to every chapter. Just because I criticise it doesn’t mean I think it’s bad, I just think it could be even better.
Careful so Akereth doesn’t become merely a villain. It’s much more interesting if he remains an essentially nice man who let his feelings run away with him and got in over his head. Perhaps that’s what you intend but right now he seems very...um...villainous. Even if his jealousy has broken him I think there must be some of the nice man left in him.
A small little thing: I don’t think you need to point out that Akereth ‘feigning’ ignorance. As the reader I’ve already guessed that and mentioning it seems superfluous.
There’s a spot of over explaining in these particular paragraphs: “The long walk back to the village had provided Bishop...” to “... that there was no other choice but to go through with it.” This is already clear from Bishop’s thoughts just after the spider has attached itself to him and also from the fact that by know the reader knows more or less how Bishop thinks.
“For years after that first girl and after the destruction of his village, he had done everything he could to avoid any more situations like that...” to “And maybe he had wanted to open up to her. Maybe.” All this explaining isn’t really necessary. It feels like a recap of the story so far and shouldn’t be needed for those who have read it. Also, I can’t imagine Bishop analysing his actions like this or thinking of his own emotional defences as any kind of fortress. That’s for somebody more prone to introspection. I think he simply feels it’s self-defence and when somebody gets too close to him it’s a weakness.
At this point I’d like to make a general comment. The story is indeed great and I enjoy it a lot. It has changed character though, just like Jaelyn. It’s lost its playfulness. I don’t know if it’s deliberate or not but perhaps you, as a writer might benefit from going back and re-reading the entire story so far. That way you might get a better feel for where it’s going and decide if it’s the direction you want.
And finally “He had an alarming, horrifying thought, then. Would those strange feelings keep arising? Would they fade in time? Or was the damage she inflicted permanent?” Snigger, pure gold!
| Gaspode chapter 33 . 8/8/2011
I've been away on my tour of duty, visiting relatives and enjoying a bit of the great outdoors and it's a pleasant surprise to come back and find another chapter of this story. I'm glad to see the story moving on, as fun as it is to put Bishop through the wringer. The plot thickens and I have a feeling it'll get a lot worse for the two rangers before it gets better. Akereth need a slap on the wrist too. I'm looking forward to some Drow butt kicking, Bishop fighting nasty mind sucking spirits and lots of angst.
| Gaspode chapter 32 . 6/2/2011
As always a really enjoyable chapter. Oddly enough I seems to have missed the previous one, I got no email about it. I was getting worried you might have given up. Phew.
It's nice to see the relationship move on and I'm very curious to see how Bishop deals with Akereth, I suspect the poor native is in for a nasty chock.
Now, that said, I'm even more curious to see if Bishop really will use this little misunderstanding as an excuse to distance himself once more. Also, I'd love to see how he deals with having someone he cares for face danger and possibly a sticky end when the rebellion against the Drow begins. I'd imagine that would be a difficult thing for anybody, especially someone as unprepared as Bishop.
There were a few minor typos but seriously, there are worse things than typos out there. Other than that, just trust the reader. We're quite a clever bunch. It doesn't feel insulting when you overstate things but the story feels more cumbersome and the narrative doesn't flow as nicely.
| Mira Maerin chapter 31 . 5/19/2011
I just saw tangled the other day. Is it just me or does Flynn kinda remind you of bishop... i mean only in appearance :P
Can't wait for the next chapters!