|Reviews for Three Years At Sea|
| Zolarix Aster chapter 10 . 12/2/2010
Lt. Jee is interesting, isn't he?
Kinda busy, not much to say. Good chapter!
| Shade40 chapter 10 . 11/29/2010
Hmm... I don't know if the violence in this warrants an upping in rating or not. Looking at the desciption for K, it seems to fit, so I wouldn't change it if I were you.
I think you captured the feeling of a sea battle, and of the hours waiting for something to happen, well. It wasn't as climatic as it could have been, and that was what made it more realistic. Everyone enjoys 'movie' fight scenes, where there are huge explosions and such, but you kept it from Zuko's point of view. And the truth is that waiting for a battle involves (probably) just as much tension and adrenaline and pressure on the mind as the battle itself. And once you are in a battle, you have no real time to think. The struggle to survive is less... epic and grandiose... than people are led to think. Anyway, I found it was real and felt right.
Zuko's offering of sake to Lieutenant Jee was cute.
| Kimberly T chapter 10 . 11/28/2010
You've obviously put a lot of thought and even research into each chapter of this story, and it shows; this is excellent work!
| Tar Irene chapter 10 . 11/26/2010
Awesome. Zuko should do more porting of pai sho strategy to real life battles - it works pretty well :) loved this chapter - you write battle really, really well. poor zuko, killing for the first time. and he's such a nice kid to have to go through that :/
about zuko and jee - totally agree. i think jee doesnt die in the mess at the north pole, but survives and comes back to teach zuko a thing or two about not acting spoiled. he probably still needs it, haha. would really love to see their relationship grow in this story!
ps. maiko forever! :)
| wolfdefender01 chapter 10 . 11/26/2010
keep it up!
| Thomson chapter 10 . 11/26/2010
This was SOOOOOO good! Great job, I can't wait to read more!
| nightpwnsj00 chapter 10 . 11/25/2010
I saw the alert for this chapter in my inbox and it made me smile. Oh, and wonderful chapter as always. :D
| AnnaAza chapter 10 . 11/25/2010
| Thomson chapter 9 . 11/24/2010
This is really good! I can't wait to read more! And I am totally a tea person so thats a plus :)
| Tar Irene chapter 9 . 11/17/2010
Gah. This is so so freaking good. The imagery is amazing, your characterizations are stunningly perfect, and the emotions of the story are harnessed better than I've ever seen in a fanfic. It's just really fantastic. I love Zuko here - usually post banishment fics make me roll my eyes - but this is so plausible and natural that I'm no longer going to be able to write my post-war adventure fic without Ozai being a coffee lover and without the drunk-with-broken-arm story playing a prominent part. I'm not kidding - this is one of the stories that are like canon to me. I absolutely love your writing. I hope you'll continue this - if you wanna brainstorm more adventures, PM me, I'd have a blast!
| Tar Irene chapter 8 . 11/17/2010
I cried during the Iroh/Lu Ten scene in this chapter. I've never, ever been that moved by their story before - not even when I watched the Tales of Bah Sing Se episode for the first time. You are incredible.
| Tora II chapter 9 . 10/23/2010
Wonderful! Zuko is by far my favorite character on AtLA, and I love seeing what he got up to in the three years of his banishment. I especially love that despite everything that's happened to him in this story, he doesn't crash into a teeming ball of ANGST and despair, he does what canon-Zuko always does; Never gives up. _ oh, and drunk-Zuko? Kind of adorkable. ;)
You requested ideas for further chapters: I'm sure not all the Air Temples are in Fire Nation occupied areas, so there's always the opportunity for him to have to encounter Earth Kingdom forces to get to a temple. And I'm sure just getting TO an Air Temple would be a bitch-and-a-half even without the Earth Kingdom forces interference. Oh, and training! If Zuko believes he is out to face a fully-trained Avatar, wouldn't he try battling the other elements, just to have an idea what he's dealing with? I can kind of see a young Zuko being foolish enough to piss off an Earthbender just to see if he stood a chance. Then Iroh promptly ripping him a new one for being so foolish.
| Stingmon chapter 9 . 10/17/2010
What do you mean I'm horribly late?
So...sorry. I think I'm doing too many things this year, and sometimes it leads me to feel cornered (frightened out of my mind, if I want to be honest, but hopefully it'll get better soon): I can't do much good as a reviewer when I'm like that.
I'll still give you a few ideas I had about what could happen to Zuko before the series (there're just so many of them ), but I would understand that you'd already planned something by now.
So, ideas: since you've such a good understanding of Zuko's character and of the emotional pressure he's going through since his banishment, I think merely writing a series of one shots would be a waste of your potential.
What I never saw in a fanfic about his banishment is simply the answer to the question: how did he keep sane? What made him hope, or rather how did he buy the time to hope for so long? Aside from his uncle, basically the whole world either hates or despises him, and once he's been to all the Air Temples he will be left with no leads at all, nothing. I think what you need is a lead. Here are a few:
-First plot: the Air Nomads. I'm guessing that, even though they're nomads, they must have at last routes, places where they used to go often...and possibly some hiding places. Caverns, hidden valleys in the mountains, things like that. Zuko might learn in old maps about those places (which means he'll have to study the Air Nomads' ways as much as possible). However, I thought he might have problems with reading said maps if the Air Nomads use air currents to situate things rather than towns or relief.
To put in a nutshell, Zuko might go to that Air temple where Teo and his father are hiding, and learn to use an airglider in order to go hunt for secret places. Which could be an awesome adventure story, and possibly improve Zuko's mood a little! (Also, it wouldn't even be unprobable: in the first episode, Zuko seems to know what an airglider is. At least, he understands pretty readily that Aang needs it to fly, and thus that he'll go look for it before escaping his ship. He also seems to know how fast it can go since he was able to stop it by jumping after Aang! Or maybe that was just kamikaze instinct...)
Second plot: the spirits. There're several possibilities for that one, but the idea is always the same: I can very well imagine Zuko becoming suddenly hopeful and even optimistic when he finds out that he will be able to go home either when he finds the Avatar, OR when he can prove that he really has disappeared. In the latter case, the Avatar should be in the Spirit world. In the former case, some spirits must know where he is, since the Avatar is the bridge between the two worlds. How fortunate, since there are legends of Iroh having traveled to the Spirit world!
Only I don't think Iroh would approve. Those plots will probably lead to more...tense stories, as far as their relationship is concerned. Either Zuko will pester his uncle about the Spirit world and be angry and hurt by his refusing to tell him about it, or Zuko will try to find spirits himself. There's that all-knowing owl in the desert whose name I forgot, and who Zuko might want to meet. I also like the idea that the Blue Spirit is actually a link to some spirit (who, I don't know, allows people to go masked to the Spirit world, and thus meet Koh without immediately losing their face, or something like that).
I...I also have a few ideas of subplots, but I think I'll stop suffocating you with my wobbly evening English prose now.
I'm not sure I still have enough room or brain to actually review the chapter. Your Zhao was absolutely brilliant: the worst damn bastard I ever met. His tormenting Zuko never felt forced: I could imagine him say just every sentence, and with each sentence I wanted to punch him that much harder.
Your description of coffee was also very vivid. The descriptions of smell and taste always add a lot of depths to a story, and you do it beautifully: do you personally have something against coffee? XD I like the smell, but often find it a bit overwhelming, and I just can't stand to drink it. So I understood poor Zuko pretty well.
Quick critique because I'm picky as hell: though funny, the part when you tell us Ozai likes coffee and what it implies left me more puzzled than anything, and I had some trouble getting back into the story after it. It just seemed...random, for some reason. Like we're reading about the hostility between Zuko and Zhao, how Zhao will torment and humiliate him in any way he can without us even knowing why...and then we have a commercial. Firelord Ozai likes coffee! Great coffee roasts all over the Fire Empire! The best coffee you'll ever drink in your life! Oh wait, this actually has something to do with the story... I got over it pretty quickly, though. Not really a problem.
Haha, are you still alive? Me neither. Good night, and thanks for this chapter!
| Shade40 chapter 9 . 10/10/2010
The idea that Fire Lord Ozai loved coffee is an interesting one. I'm not sure I like the idea, simply because (as far as I remember), there were no hints in the series of any such love, but it is certainly believable, and you played with it well.
I liked your idea that Azula will be confirmed as Ozai's heir when she turns sixteen. I can understand Zuko's fierce desire to capture the Avatar as quickly as possible, but he always seemed to me to be TOO desperate for speed. I don't know, if I were in his position, not even knowing whether the Avatar was still alive or not would quell my hopefulness. Knowing that there is a time limit to his being able to restore his position would lend to his need to search with vigor.
I also liked the reference to Mai being betrothed, and Zuko's reaction to that. Unless I've forgotten something you wrote before, it isn't as if Zuko knows he loves Mai. Not yet, anyway. His reaction seemed so cute and innocent. He might not realize he loves her yet, but being her friend and caring about her, the idea of her being betrothed bothers him, which is an entirely natural reaction. It's a sweet sentiment.
Zuko's reaction to the coffee is a little extreme, but our sense of smell IS the strongest trigger for memories. I don't think you were over the top with it. If an unpleasant memory was connected to a strong scent, then it is quite possible that smelling that scent will trigger the emotions of the memory.
Iroh's admonition to Zuko about finding a driving force other than anger was important and connected well with the series. While Zuko does always seem angrier than he needs to be, when he loses his firebending temporarily in the third series, the characters associate that with his loss of pursuing the Avatar, not due to a loss in anger. Taking that, it seems that Zuko did learn to fuel his firebending with 'driving force' more than with anger.
As for plot ideas, I'm not too sure. I wouldn't mind seeing a mild confrontation between Zuko and people who have been adversely affected by the war. But Zuko doesn't seem to show much concern or even awareness of the damaging effects of the war until after he finds the Avatar, so it would have to be something he could overlook and dismiss from his mind until later. Hmm, in the first season, we don't see Zuko and his men interacting much with non-Firebenders, and I would feel it safe to assume that people are afraid of them. Perhaps Zuko should be made to see how people fear the Fire Nation, but in a way that makes him think their fear is unjustified?
| Yogogirl13 chapter 9 . 10/8/2010
Oh My Gawd! O 3 O This story is piling up with more awesome sauce! :3 So you need more ideas, eh? Well...I was kinda thinking that Zuko would probably 'finally' cry...just a suggestion-no,PLEADING! Please have him cry, if it isn't too much to ask...!