|Reviews for David Crowley and the Lost Runes|
| Guest chapter 1 . 5/30/2015
Sorry guys for the wait but the conclusion will be posted as soon as I return
| Ravenous Oranges chapter 27 . 5/28/2012
Definitely action packed were only a few mistakes I could spot, substituting "Here" for "Hear was one of them. I don't know if it's just me, but David seems to have matured a lot in the past few chapters. There was definitely enough development for it to seem realistic.
These chapters were, as always, well written. Enough Drama and action to keep it interesting and the quick paced nature of them helped emphasize the urgency. The whole chapter with Gawain was almost ethereal, and for some odd reason put me in mind of Gandalf from LOTR. I loved the way that chapter ended, it was really one of my favourites in this story so far. The price of power is quite high.
I also liked Snow's explosion, it definitely added to his character. He no longer seems so two-dimensional. Snow, like David, is emerging as a fully functional character. The only problem I had with chapter 27 was the rapid character interaction of David and Evangeline. I'm not sure if my memory is betraying me, but I don't recall them being romantically involved. I know it was heading that way, but I don't remember any evidence of it being set in stone.
The wit at the end of the chapter was warmly welcomed! After so much drama, it's good to get a small dose of normality. I'm interested to see what Castiel's role in the next chapter is. :)
I apologize for the delay in reviewing. Good job!
Until next time,
| Ravenous Oranges chapter 24 . 2/18/2012
I cannot express how adorable I find Abby. She's so innocent, but wise at the same time. I actually really like her character. And even in the turmoil it brought a smile to my face to see her and Davids interaction.
The action was not disappointing. Heart-pumping and descriptive as usual. If you tried to fit this in last chapter it would have lost some of its luster.
I'm curious to see how this plays out, so my eyes will be peeled for next chapter.
Ps. I see what you mean about the music. It was pretty epic how similar the theme of the story matched it :)
| Codeman chapter 24 . 2/18/2012
Hahaha great job man. Him calling forth the true form of his aegis gave me a shiver. Also liked the Abby character along with him, made everything seem more dire and intense. I will try to read more of the chapters as they come out so you wont have to remind me this time
| nickesco chapter 24 . 2/18/2012
The only thing that I noticed about this chapter that seemed to bother me was that he was saying the spells instead of making the spell circles with his other hand.
Besides that I thought it was precious that David protected a little girl from harm.
Didn't he bring the box arm thing with him? I would have thought that he'd be casting the same spell twice with that on his arm.
| Ravenous Oranges chapter 23 . 2/17/2012
...Wow! This turn of events was completely unpredictable. Congratulations, that thought would have never occurred to me. You were right, i really liked this chapter.
Those creatures put me in mind of the creatures from "Alien vs. Predator" both interesting and terrifying at the same time.
However, I found the part with the headmistress a little misplaced. She has no other interactions with anyone, so it just seems a little random. I loved what happened, but I just think it would of made more sense if there was more insight to the character and what they were looking for.
You thought right, this was an amazing chapter and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I hope to see the next chapter soon ;)
| nickesco chapter 23 . 2/14/2012
So these things are like raptors? They sound so nasty in the most good of killing monster ways. They're like a vicious army, considering they are being controlled.
I figured since you used wand ingredients to make the box that you could use it to make spells. Even though it seems he still doesn't know how to use it quite well yet. Its still cool. That box is probably on the same level as another wand. Although it uses everything that I can think of for wand ingredients and more so I'd say that its almost like a super powerful wand.
Overall. Quite enjoyable. Good work. Can't wait until the next chapter. For me this is on par with Naruto or Bleach.
| nickesco chapter 22 . 2/5/2012
I'm kinda blown away by how this chapter has progressed the story. I wouldn't have thought that david would become even cooler. Makes me wonder if he's going to start making new spells up now. Or in turn become a teacher that teaches new magic.
Keep the good work coming!
| Ravenous Oranges chapter 22 . 2/3/2012
Very interesting approach to his trance-like possession. I have to say, it was an experience reading it from that angle. It definitely captured the detached feeling of your character.
Aha, suspicions are confirmed. Professor Merlin is who I thought him to be! I love the interpretation of magic that you've given. Its such a complex thing, almost like science theories. If no body bothers to look more in-depth it eventually dies out due to lack of knowledge and motivation to uncover these theories. Simple contributions or not. They all shed light on the greater overall picture.
You definitely have an imagination. I'll be looking forward to seeing what else you have in store.
| Ravenous Oranges chapter 21 . 2/1/2012
Never a dull moment in this story. It goes from action, to mystery, to even more action.
There are only a few mistakes I can see, other than that these few chapters where well written. I have to say I loved the way you ended chapter 19, I don't know why. Also it'll be interesting to see how the revealing of identities will impact David.
The only thing I found confusing would be Desmond and David's encounter in your latest chapter. The whole bracelet thing might have been mentioned..maybe in regards to Naendalance? But I don't recall anything about them.
I'm curious about the tiles and Professor Merlin's lessons. I have a half-notion that it's some sort of mage training. But that's only a half-formed theory of mine.
All in all, wonderfully written chapters. The action and mystery never ceases. I'll be looking forward to learning and uncovering more.
| nickesco chapter 21 . 1/8/2012
Here's some things that need some corrections. Corrections in the ().
They were going to kill him, he though.(thought)
He felt a tight grip on his hair life his face from the ground.(Don't understand why you need life in this sentence.)
David spit a massive amount of blood from his blood and wiped his mouth with his wrist. (the second blood should be mouth I would think.)
"No, Mr. Crowely." he replied simply, setting aside his parchment and drawing another paper in fron og him. (front of him.)
A couple of gammer mistakes but for the most part I did enjoy this chapter. You always give a sense of conflict in your story. There's never a boring chapter.
| Kaphey chapter 20 . 12/12/2011
This story is great. It's really a shame that so few people have reviewed it. I guess it's because it doesn't list any character.
Anyway, I wanted to tell you this is really a story I enjoyed reading and I am waiting the rest of it with impatience. I really don't know where this is headed and there is also a lot of plots going on. I guess this will be massive work !
I love the way spells are represented as runic circles and what runes are used, those coming from different bits of history. I'll look forward to the meaning of maths in all this. It promises to be really interesting !
Elves, runes, maths, Merlin, new world... you have a lot of imagination and I love it. Go on writing this story, I can't wait for the next bits.
| Codeman chapter 19 . 10/9/2011
Amazing and brutal chapter, i loved how they just went crazy on each other beating eachother down. few spelling errors but a great and wonderfully written chapter for sure. Akso im curious to see how both of those characters revealing there identities will work out and to see how their paths will go from here onward, like always cannot wait till the next chapter
| Sable du Lac chapter 1 . 9/4/2011
This should be sorted under "OC" in the character thingy.
| Ravenous Oranges chapter 18 . 9/4/2011
Have I ever mentioned how much I love your description? Well, I do.
The game of Neandalance is definitely unique and incredibly intricate. You definitely have a great imagination.
There was absolutely no mistakes, except for a few sentences where words were in the wrong tense. Other than that it was a fantastic chapter.
All in all, I loved it. I can't wait to see how you continue this.