|Reviews for Darkest Before Dawn|
| Sherry chapter 36 . 7/15
I really liked your story in the beginning. Especially the concept of the herai. Unfortunately ther are a few contradictions in cour story that almost made me stop reading further. First you mention that Rial is 16 in his 4th year when he participates in the Triwizard turnament. That makes him 17 in the beginning of this story and in the end even 18 and not 16 like you keep writing. Furthermor you introduced Varian as Lucius father, but later on you say that he was forced into becoming a death eater by his father Abraxas, who killed his mother Belladonna. But now when Varian dies he is calld Lucius father again. It would make sens if Lucius fews him as his father since he hate his real father but he was in fact his grandfather. But still there is a problem with the age. Since both other herai have SONS Lucius age, so all three herai had their children very late in life to skip a generation (which is unlikely) to make that scenario possible.
Those things unfortunatly kinda ruin the story...
| Shetan20 chapter 38 . 6/26
Thank you for a brilliant chapter.
| Guest chapter 43 . 6/19
| Lilith Noctura chapter 23 . 6/12
I wondered how Dumbledore connected 'I' m the one no one wants' whith the midnightsun when the line doesn't appear the prophecy?
| Lilith Noctura chapter 19 . 6/12
If Zachary turned down Draco's friendship because of his lastname why did he befriend Draco's brother?
| Lady of Moon Over Silver Seas chapter 12 . 5/31
The James Potter Theme Song wouldn't happen to have anything in common with Jaws' would it?
| Mickey chapter 43 . 5/19
I loved this story from start to finish
| Guest chapter 28 . 4/24
In chap 23 you said Fudge was already sacked and Rufus was Minister but in cap 28 they are planning on how to get Fudge removed
| Mariana chapter 24 . 4/23
I loved this chapter it was very good.
| Guest chapter 4 . 4/7
| zayla di la vera chapter 38 . 2/16
| Mindmaze chapter 3 . 1/7
I don't get why the mark would turn peole against Rial. If anything it is a sign he was tortured by the dark and should reasure everyone he is not on their side (even if they think he's not light) so I don't understand this train of thought. I anything it should remind the public that their so called savior is a coward and make them question if they should really be relying on him considering he abandoned his brother. After all he felt his blood to save his own skin why would he save them? If anything it should be the chosen one being looked at in distrust (it's not like people aren't aware of what he did) and Rial getting support. I get you wanting to stack the deck against your character to give him a hurdle to overcome but this feels very forced even by wizarding logic. I mean it's not enough for me to not like this story because I do like it but is (in my opinion) a definite flaw. I'm sure you could have focused on another reason such as his snake speaking to push this point but instead you chose the one thing that breaks my suspense of disbelief. I only point it out because it seems like such an amateur mistake which baffles me because your writing is clearly superior. Anyways I'll balance this out by admitting to finding your dialogue awesome! Just wow, you really get your characters and give them a distinct voice, I love hearing them plot and show their fangs when they engage one another.
| vampwolfs chapter 1 . 1/3
I really loved it
| Vampireking40 chapter 8 . 12/11/2017
You say Zachery is 16, but isn't he actually 17 since Rial is 17.
| Siebenschlaefer chapter 43 . 11/15/2017
I liked it. Very interesting, well written and good characterizations. I love the midnight sun prophecy. And the interactions between Draco and Harry/Rial. But the confrontation with Albus - what should be the climax - was a little bit fast and nearly anti-climatic. But still a good read, and I think I will read it again.