|Reviews for 5 Dear Friend from Sukima|
| SynchroXyzStriker chapter 1 . 6/20/2014
This is SynchroXyzStriker and I’m here to review this story.
You decided to focus on a character like Nitori Kawashiro. The main original character is a villain protagonist and it’s quite enjoyable seeing how the plot unfolds. Guzman has guts to face his fate on his own, despite being judged severely by Shiki Eiki.
Overall, this story is great, and you dedicated much of your time in writing this. This is one of the best in your Sukima series and my favorite so far.
But I'm also here for something else; I am on a "writer's block" and I really need ideas; I was wondering if you can try reading my fanfic and giving out your thoughts on this? Granted, my story isn’t exactly a crossover, but it’s a Science Fantasy story nonetheless; my fanfic is called “Touhou Strikers – The Silver Lining"
Trust me; it's a lot more awesome than it sounds; I know my fanfic isn't that great, but I want your honest opinion on this one. Please reply back. I appreciate your reviews. It helps motivate me to write more chapters. :)
| sairentio chapter 21 . 8/6/2013
Damn, even if you prefer writing random light-hearted stuff, you're real good at doing a serious atmosphere, too. And Guzman was well written, especially his last moments, I would have never expected that he'd do that, impressive Willie, impressive!
But now to the light-hearted pieces: "Rika smiles and gently scratches the back of Momiji's left ear, causing Momiji to squeal softly" *hnnnng* you're trying to kill me, aren't you? No, ignore that, give us more Momiji! Just kidding, however I could imagine some more interaction between Kyo and Momiji, as they had quite an impact on each other as they trained together (was it in the first or second book/fiction/whatever-you-call-it-here) and set their goals quite higher. But maybe I'm just misunderstanding/imagining things here.
You're humor is of course priceless as always and I've noticed that you've upped your joke-repertoire quite a bit, from the classic "disturbance in the faith"-joke over that awesome mental image of Mima wearing a pair of stupid goggles and her ghostly tail fluttering like a windsock during the snowstorm at the shrine, to which I laughed way more than I should have xD ... oh, and of course the MANservice.
And besides those not that much to say, what I haven't said earlier, sorry that I didn't say so much about the serious parts, but I'll be honest I just didn't find the words and I didn't want to say something like "poor everyone", I hope you can understand that
I will start reading the last two (until now) soon, I'm very excited about those and after those I can finally devote myself to another bigger story :D. I just hate reading two bigger storys/series parallel, because I just can't get properly into the atmosphere like that.
Keep going on like always, stay awesome and I will be always happy to see more of you, bye
*snicker* Ail-kun, hehe xD *sound of opening gap* oh-oh *PAWNCH* ouch, sorry Ail...
| Ciruno Rowe 'Augmented Conduit chapter 1 . 5/16/2011
Auto fave. This is heading to an epic story
| Lester Wilson Not signed in chapter 21 . 12/2/2010
Heheh...Washtub hell. And Cirno beats flashlight? Lolwut
Dude, this is the best story you've wrote! Could you send a message to my inbox?
| The Hexagonal Donut chapter 21 . 11/24/2010
Hey, couldja define normal? Seriously, I don't think that's ANYWHERE in Gensokyo.
I was waiting (im)patiently for this final chapter, and now we have to wait to see what chaos occurs in your next Sukima story.
And now that I officially have all of the Sukima stories read, I can actually get back to work on Coming of High Danger... Hopefully. Yes, I put that on hold just to read the whole Sukima series. There a problem with that? I don't think there is.
All in all, words cannot describe how awesome the whole of the Sukima Series (so far) has been. You start with Maribel and Renko trying to get into Gensokyo, but Ail and Kyo go in instead, you get a shadow problem, Ail and Maribel get stuck in Makai, a living gap starts eating people, shadows of the people who've been eaten start running around, Marisa almost gets Gensokyo destroyed with a portal to the Dragon's Paradise, and then, an asshole named Guzman decides to start being a real asshole and kill everyone. Quite chaotic series, wouldn't you agree? And you know me, Chaos Awesome.
Overall score so far: 9001/100 (Pun intended)
| The Hexagonal Donut chapter 20 . 11/23/2010
The insanity finally comes to a close. How unfortunate. Can't wait for the extra chapter!
I also can't wait for the next chapter in the Sukima series.
And now I get the title too- Dear friend from Sukima refers to Guzman. (I'd give him a title to describe just what I think of him, but I'm not gonna bother.)
And don't go thinking I don't know what's going to happen next. Have fun trying to figure out what I mean.
| WillieG.R chapter 20 . 11/20/2010
Hmm, how to say this... First off, this is a Gensokyo universe. Idealism is the main course, as magic and faith are the stronghold of this world.
Second, I can clearly see you merely glanced around the chapters. Really, I'm a bit disappointed. Two examples of this would be what you said about Ivan in your latest comment. His soul is no more. He jumped into the Sanzu River and got eaten by one of the larger fish in there before drowning. His soul is no longer part of the rebirth cycle of that world.
Second example is what you said about Aya, and what our friend, mister Guzman had done to her. If you had read through, you'd know he completely destroyed her, not just cut off her wings as you said. If you had read through, you would know he literally opened her up, stabbed her heart directly, and even destroyed half her face. Really, it's rated "T" so I couldn't go into full gory details; not that I would anyway.
Life is very different, it's true. Ideals are fleeting dreams that vanish into thin air, but these fictions are not real life, particularly concerning Touhou Project, which, again I say, emphasizes on magic, faith and dream-like ideals sometimes.
I am also posting this reply in the review section to defend my story. Really, some people read the reviews first, and what you have written as reviews (comments) here would discourage others from at least trying to read this story.
Anyways, take Ivan. I don't really mind, and honestly don't want him back in my Touhouverse (Touhou Universe), other than possible referencing. Change his family name as I'll be using it for possible future reference, if you want. From what you have told me, I'm sure you'll make better us of him than I did. Then again maybe not. The future is never written in stone.
You take care, and really, thanks for your suggestions and for trying to help me, but I said it before, I'll say it again, and I'll keep saying it to all that want so hard to change me, probably for the better, probably not. I am me, and will continue to be, no matter where I am.
Take care, and good luck.
| Heraklinios chapter 20 . 11/20/2010
So you chose Idealism over Realism...huh.
Well, it's your choice. No matter how hard a human can try, he can't change other's will, as much as he may try.
*sigh* Well, guess I'll scanvenge Ivan since you won't need him anymore. His soul's still there, in hell...or whatever hell he ended. There's lots of hell since many people are evil...
Hey, hell needs a break sometimes!
But anyways, it's good to see a pure idealist here...I just hope you don't get dissapointed in life. Good luck, partner.
Raim: Too cheesy...it tastes like diabeties.
Oh, shut up.
| Heraklinios chapter 19 . 11/16/2010
Even though I'm not so much fan of Moe Blobness used in excess, I think I can praise your efforts in humor.
Now, it needs to evolve. How?
Bingo. You really know what to say sometimes.
Raim: Ah, shut up. I mean it.
As I was saying, you need to snark. Snark is the future. If you keep using the same style, either people will like it(who are loyal to the story) or get bored. That's dangerous, you know.
Raim: Well, at least, this was more cynist than before...but failed in that too.
True. Your series is just...well, too idealist. I know you tried to make it dark and cynist...but, the lines that Ivan guy said...were too cliche. Instead of feeling angry, I was laughing my ass off. Seriously, instead of cutting Aya's wing, I would instantly striked the guts, moved zig-zag while singing Bohemian Rhapsody, ignoring the screams (PINEAPPLES!), and then...
Raim: WHOA! Whoa whoa whoa, don't scare the guy! Seriously, humans are the true monsters here...
...You know you're insulting yourself, you know?
Meh, at least I wish to live to see the world burn. It's fun!
Raim: Jesus hemorraging Christ, are you really my creator?
...Ask yourself that.
So well, what I'm telling you is to evolve your ways of writing. You seems to be inmersed in your world. That's bad, for me that is. Feel real life. Just saying "X character was raped. X's angry and wants revenge" just doesn't cut it anymore. You need to expand. Or even better, have no reason at all and want to watch the world BURN! Burn I say!
Raim:...Did you smoke something?
Ah, shut up. *ahem* So, I await for an evolution. To be honest, I think Ivan has potential...as a recrutable de-
Raim: Hey hey, no. No. No no no no... there's NO WAY in hell...or hells, that you wil-
Relax, will ya?
Raim: I know you're lying.
Raim: Goddammit, stop acting like Louis!
...*sigh* Fine. Just seeing your face in disray was enough.
Aw, you know me too well. Besides, the dimensions are interconnected, you know.
Raim: ...I know. Louis showed me. But still, there's under the rule of Law. Those conniving Lawful bastards...
I know. Little does everyone suspect that Shikieiki is being used by Law as a moderator.
Raim: Yes. I noticed. So, two Shikieikis, huh?
That's the only explanation. What's Metatron planning?
Raim: If he intends to use Ail and the others to invade this dimension with a fake story via Shikieiki, then, we'll have problems. They won't believe an outsider. Even though she has a will, she's too Lawful and their influence is enough to attack us.
Well, that's for you to deal with. Bye!
Raim: ...*mumble* Heartless prick...
| ShimmerMist chapter 18 . 11/12/2010
Psh...Don't worry so much!
I believe you portrayed Eiki well. I feel that if she ever lost a soul like that, then she would be just as distraugt as you wrote her!
Washtubs...um... *grabs an umbrella*
| Heraklinios chapter 18 . 11/11/2010
Well, this was a fun chapter and all. But again...I'm very obliged to...snark! (I'm Raim by the way).
Shikieiki: "court is now in session. Sinners are not allowed to speak while I rule out their judgment!"
Raim: "Hey, where's the defence attorney? Or the prosecutor? Don't tell me you're actually doing the procedure alone?"
Shikieiki:"Ivan Guzman; in just a single lifetime, you took more than a staggering number of lives, tortured said souls before finally finishing them off, raped, stole, lied, destroyed lives, families, broke minds, abused those weaker than you, and still, here you are, not feeling a single ounce of regret."
Raim: "*whistle* Take a long shit list. If you were a demon, this is a good curriculum!...Except for the rape part.
...Hold on, he's human. How can he break minds? Is he a freaking psychic?"
Shikieiki: "you were happy with such a simple life, and so you constantly ignored the call of life. You were a very strong soul, and you had a very important task, so life had to take away that which stopped you from moving on."
Raim: "Really? Then life's a douche. Wait, why didn't life leave him alone? If he didn't wanted to, why press him? Seriously life, sometimes you screw things up. Big time."
Shikieiki: ""what would she think if she ever saw you now? See what you've become? What do you think your mother, Ina, would say if she knew about all the things you have done."
Raim: "Either she could say "What an asshole!" or "Good job! I was so idiot to raise a child like that, that I ended dead. Yay!". I'm dead serious."
Shikieiki: "that fool forgot he broke the gas pipes and shot that brave woman out of rage. Don't worry about her, though. Her soul has been reborn already, and she's doing just fine... But we're not here to talk about her, are we?"
Raim: "Uh, question. How the hell do you forgot shooting a gas pipe? Hell, the smell only would alert that! Seriously, he could've avoided death by picking the knife from the dead body and stab the woman? Geez, people don't know how to kill!"
Shikieiki: "you started hating life, and so you bullied all of those weaker than you... and as you grew, you aimed higher, and higher, making all that surrounded you fear you, even those that tried to help, and not just those at school. You even managed to break that kind neighbor woman that tried to befriend you. You even when as far as to take her by force, then tried to make her commit suicide..."
Raim: "Higher on what? To be the greatest assassin? Suicide? This reminds me of Johan from Monster. But hey, at least he had a style. You, well, you're just a pussy."
Guzman: "here. You're ruined for marriage now. Go ahead. End it all now."
Raim: "Or alternately, run to the police station and order them to arrest this motherf**ker, saving us from all the events that would happen afterwards..."
Shikieiki: "what is the matter with you? How can you not feel even the slightest bit of regret? That child, that woman..."
Raim: "...Eh, they're dead already. Give them a rest."
Shikieiki: "and for the first time in so many years of your 'miserable' life, you felt your heart beat once more. Life gave you a second chance, but it saw fit to hit you hard in order to calm you down."
Raim: "Apparently, life knows how to bitch-slap people."
Shikieiki: "Ilia Melendez, the spitting image of your mother. You couldn't believe your eyes. What surprises us most is how quickly you changed when she came into your life. She scolded you constantly, and you even glared back at her... but you followed her every command to a fault."
Raim: "Wow, your badness decayed harshly. Seems she had the pants there. Wait a sec, those last names sound spanish...or mexican at least. Question, HOW THE HELL SOMEONE FROM THOSE PLACES GETS TO GENSOKYO?"
Shieiki: "that boy you bullied on a regular basis came across you while you were at work. He couldn't forgive what you did to him, so he plotted to take revenge on you. Did you know he had gone mad for what you did to him? Such a pure soul, gone to waste because of YOU! He was supposed to become the world's most integral leader, but because of you, he had become a madman, and died as such!"
Raim: "Okay, how the hell do you know that? And how do you know that was a pure soul? Nobody can know what one is. Not even with your accesory there. And, the world's most integral leader? Bullshit! Fate isn't set in stone. Learn that already!"
Ivan: "please! I'll give you whatever you want, just let my daughter go!"
Raim: "You know...you could've just shoot him. I'm sure you had weapons with you."
Boy: "yes! You do remember. How many times I begged you to just... leave me ALONE, and yet... you went on to beat me to a pulp! My father called me WEAK, my mother got SICK of cleaning the blood off my uniform, and you kept going on, RUINING my life... Well, it's time to pay for what you did, so..."
Raim: "Well, then your parents are dicks. Instead of supporting you, they treated you like crap. Hooray for parenthood!"
Shikieiki: "such a terrible thing. It was painful, yes, but what you did afterward was NOT the right thing to do! You mutilated that man before you finally killed him, desecrated his body by performing black magic on it, he couldn't even make it past the Sanzu River because of you, and you weren't done there, weren't you? After that, you declared that life was a farce, that happiness was just a distraction to reality. You infused a gun with a very dark spell and started hunting humans, running from the law while taking lives, and if you couldn't kill someone with several shots, you'd torture them to their deaths with that dark spell, making the experience the same bullet wounds over and over until their minds broke, and THEN, you finally killed them. You managed to escape here to the east, keep yourself unknown, only giving out your family name, renouncing your given name, hunt down more humans and killing them with a smile, as though you were doing good, you became a real-life monster! You even looked to women as things, and used them as such, even those you hunted down! You defiled their bodies and spirits and then killed them in a most horrifying way!"
Raim: "Okay, how the hell you mutilate a person BEFORE killing it? It's impossible! They're already dead by that point! And, black spell? How the hell did you learn that? There's no books of magic in the outside world if I remember. Chanelling dark enregy into guns?Again, how did you learn that? Also, how can you declare everything an ilussion? Dude, your conceptions of reality and fantasy are completely screwed. So then, your daughter was an ilussion too, eh? Nice! And no, Shikieiki, he was no monster. He was a human. There are WORSE monsters, I'm sure. Yes, we're bastards. And I think we love that."
Shikieiki: "so, you ran away from the west after you became a wanted man for all the countless crimes you committed, and somehow landed here over the east. Well, I'll let you know now it was not by chance you ended up here. You see, you were fated to come. Life knew your potential, and knew the great good you could do. You are a genius who regrettably undervalued everyone, yet you never underestimated them either. You treated everyone you hunted as equals to you, even when they were weaker in strength. You knew, and you still know that what one person lacks in one virtue, he or she makes up with another, to the point of rivaling yours! This is a great wisdom, yes... but you used it for all the wrong purposes!"
Raim: "Fate my ass! Well then, if "Life" knew so much about him, then it must've noticed he was a COMPLETE deranged motherf**ker. Seriously, Life, what the hell? What were you smoking?"
Shikieiki: "however, YOU came across none other than one of your daughter's bodies, saved her and cared for her without her knowledge, but you also USED her to your fulfill your misguided needs! You hunted Ail and made him and ALL around him suffer, but thankfully, fate intervened just in time, and you came across the angel that was to help you on the way to the light! Yes, that woman you called a devil, was actually your guardian angel, and she wanted to help, but all you wanted was to kill her, all because she made you remember! Well guess what, that is how you were supposed to heal, and she would have gladly guided you through it all, but you resisted and attacked, and attacked, and attacked, and you hurt her and those around her!"
Raim: "IRONY! *laughter* Man, that's hilarious...What the hell is worng with me?"
Ina: "I'm sorry my son, but you just can't see the light. You'd go blind. I'm afraid all that is left for you, is to listen to this kind enma. She will do what is just and fair for you."
Raim: "Wow, you're a worst mother than I thought, lady."
Shikieiki: "it's no use! What's the point of this? If I send you to hell before you repent, you'll never learn your lesson. What am I supposed to do here?"
Raim: "Uh, I don't know...perhaps KILIING HIM? Use your head, for god that-is-not-YHVH sake!"
Shikieiki: "you FOOL! What have you done! You completely reversed your purpose! You were meant to lead the people free from the oppressors of the outside world, no turn your back on life!"
Raim: "Uh, no. That's Louis' job. But since you're sided with YHVH, you wouldn't understand..."
*sigh* Ah, that felt good. Sorry, but your story is a fountain of snark bait. And I love every second of it. Hehehe, well I'm outta here. Good luck.
| The Hexagonal Donut chapter 17 . 11/8/2010
I'm trying to figure out if this is the final chapter. I imagine it's not, but I can't be sure.
And also, at some point you should make a sixth Sukima story. Oh yeah, that's right. I need to finish reading Another Misplaced Sukima.
| ShimmerMist chapter 17 . 11/6/2010
Is it bad that I actually pity Guzman for the lecture I assume he will be recieving in the next chapter?
And did Reisen honestly sugguest what I think she did?
| Xoverguy chapter 13 . 11/6/2010
Ok, im submitting this review since your last comment in this chapter hit me. I felt kinda offended when I heard that we were too lazy to review, but just a little. However, the reason I haven't reviewed? That's just how good your fanfic is. Can't stop for a moment, no sir. At the same time, I find myself reading it while doing university homework and such. Nice plot, good use of english, you balance out the foes, essentially eliminating mary-sueness.
Sincerely, personally speaking, I felt that Marisa losing her magic in the previous Sukima was more of a big deal than this Gusman character. Don't get me wrong, he is the hellspawn he is, but he's in for a karma backlash, especially with seeing evil as good and good as evil. Sad, but he dosn't seem to have redemption. There going to take him out seems. Somehow, its so satisfying when the gang adapts and gets their hits in.
And about this guy that was gunning for Ali and Kyo, and taking over the alternate Makai, is that forshadowing for the next Sukima? Is there something worse than Gusman? LOL. Can't wait to see that.
This is why I don't review much. They are well thought out and written. Not just a "nice chapter". Seeya!
| The Hexagonal Donut chapter 14 . 11/5/2010
I can only imagine how chaotic this story would be with Henix in it. If you WANT me to go into detail on how that would be, just ask.
Either way, MAGNIFICENT story. And you know what's hilarious? When I first read this and saw the name Rika I was thinking of Rika Asakura. .
I need to read your other sukimas now. .