Reviews for Living with a Star
1012ZJ chapter 17 . 5/22/2014
next chapter please :/
Im nervous because of this phrase
"What about Allen"

that phrase its really making me think a lot !
Arbitually chapter 18 . 8/24/2013
Don't worry of you don't feel like writing or if muses leave you. It happens to everyone. Just remember that no on is gonna blame you for being on haitus. It's easy to write, but hard to form beauty.

P.S. I don't see how you cringe, I say it's good. Now my waly work, that was bad! Till then, hope you get your groove back.
soulwriter51 chapter 17 . 12/12/2012
I rlly can't wait till u update this out of all the ones I read this is the best one the part I liked the most is the kiss still can't wait till u update till then
AlLenaLeeWalkerXD chapter 16 . 6/9/2012
I love your Story :)

I know all the songs that you put. I like it :)

It's your choice to improve Maricar's character but for me it's fine with it :)

I really like your story :)
Hellocloser chapter 16 . 2/29/2012
Yayy! I started reading this on the iPhone fanfiction app, and I really like it! Glad to see you've updated!
FallenKing47 chapter 16 . 2/25/2012
wonderful TT! Love it so much *sniff*! Please update soon!

AllenxME chapter 16 . 2/20/2012
Rely good but u no watll make it better? If lenalee had a RIVAL oh yea! And not just any cierra type one but and true blue sabotage I love Allen MORE type just some advice cause things hav been rather smooth latly (notthat I have anything agaist it!) Can u make Allen sing smexier song (nothing to bad!) just u no "my producer made me" songs. Great story can't wait for next update!
AllenxME chapter 15 . 2/19/2012
I red this ages ago though...:(
comet77 chapter 16 . 9/29/2011
Yay! You updated! I really liked this chappy btw. It had a great amount of fluff in in that makes me very happy.

Anyway, you still need to get a BETA ASAP. Your grammar is absolutely atrocious. If you can't get a BETA, at least have a friend read over it, or SOMETHING. You switch tenses and POVs way too much, and you said that Tyki was coming in a half in a half an hour, but he came in about two seconds.

The way you explained Allen's hair and scar was also completely impossible. There is absolutely no way that dyed hair can last that long, even if it was permanent. The hair would grow out silly, and permanent marker doesn't last that long either.

Maricar is a bit of a Mary Sue, but that doesn't keep me from liking her. She has a strong personality that is needed in a character, and she's definitely not a useless character. She's very suited for Lavi.

There were also many sayings in there that were messed up, like when Maricar was threatening Allen with telling Komui about him and Lenalee, and you made him say "Yo won't..." when it would be better for him to say "You wouldn't..."

Those are just SOME of the mistakes I found. GET A BETA!

But please, don't be offended by this. I only want this story to be the best it can be. _

tentsubasa chapter 16 . 9/26/2011
Hi, interesting chapter. Just so you know, courting is more serious than dating. Courting is kind of like dating with the intention of marrying the person you're dating. It's not something you do just to get to know someone.
TheRandomGirl chapter 16 . 9/26/2011
Well idk, I like maricar. Awesome, enters cross marian! He is like awesomely evil or crazy all the time, it's funny :D I won't throw stuff at you, but hope you update! It's okay if it's not so soon though, but I was thrilled to see an update this time!
Etcetera-etc chapter 16 . 9/25/2011
YOU'RE A FRESHMAN TOO! OMFG, EVEN THOUGH I DON'T KNOW YOU AND AM PRETTY SURE WE DON'T LIVE ANYWHERE NEAR EACH OTHER, DO YOU HAVE HONORS CLASSES FOR ENGLISH! Ah my god! I hateee honors, but I have to stay for my grades..! /3 (' Heard colleges/UCs take more Honors with Bs instead of regular As because the Honors express determination, effort and the need of a challenge... -sighhhh...-)
knightlychika chapter 16 . 9/25/2011
Yays :D Okey-day, so beta first (again):

-She didn't care whether she was in her pajamas: Changing the "whether" to "that" would make more sense, or saying "whether or not"

-She didn't tell anyone, even Maricar, that she has a crush on him: Change "has" to "had"

-"I can't control the decisions Lenalee make": Add an "s" to the end of "make"

-He knew that when Lavi is back: Change "is" to "was"

-Maricar was once a shy and timid: Adding "girl" to the end make more sense, or taking out the "a"

-The girl broke down and her poor classmates began teasing her about this: I'd take the "poor" out or move it to in front of "girl"

-They did that because they don't want to feel numb: Change "don't" to "didn't"

-Alma yawned and woke up: It would make more sense if you flip-flop "yawned" and "woke up" so it reads "Alma woke up and yawned"

-She got up from bed and heard her phone rang: "Heard" and "rang" are redundant, so you could either change "rang" to "ring" or take out the "heard"

-"Maricar isn't dating someone and so is Lenalee": It would make more sense to change the "someone" to "anyone" and "so is" to "neither is"

-Courting doesn't count as dating right?: Change "doesn't" to "didn't"

-Poor Lavi, was what Road could only say: It would make more sense to say "Poor Lavi, was all that Road could say"

-Alma faced palm herself: Since face-palming is one action, then the "ed" would go on the end of "palm" to make it "face-palmed"

-Alma always seemed to know whenever he has dangerous thoughts: Change "has" to "had"

-Because she knew that Road's negative aura isn't because of her: Change "isn't" to "wasn't"

-A few minutes had past and yet, Road and the others haven't left the bedroom: Change "haven't" to "hadn't"

SUPERCHICK! I love them! :D Have you heard their new song "Still Here"? Haha sorry, I just love them so much and it seems like no one I know listens to them XD

And I don't think Maricar's really a Mary Sue. I mean, everyone in the series is an orphan and I think her reaction was realistic.

Yay, Allen and Lenalee are courting! :D
Cupcakinator chapter 15 . 8/11/2011
Please continue this, I remember starting this story a few months ago. Or at least tell us if your not gonna continue. I love this story. I have a question about Allens hair though, why didn't he just dye it back? Anyway, love it so far
Guest chapter 14 . 6/3/2011
ca.9yrs not an author
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