|Reviews for Syndicate|
| Rouge Pur chapter 26 . 4/19
I have yet to read the previous chapters, but I am liking the suspense here! I don't really have much to say due to the lack of knowledge I have on the whole thing, but I'm going to turn back and start reading the it ;)) I just love how you made the characters of Neji and Tenten. So cool, lol. I would like to read more!
| Sayori Hollyhood chapter 26 . 4/9
Hitomi. regardless how much of a asset she could be too their mission I still feel like she is not to be trusted. I felt that way since she was first introduced. She seems to have trust issues and with good reason. But how can you exspect trust when you can barely give it.
As for Tenten, whatever distance she want to keep between her and Neji disintegrated once she took Lucia. All the good, bad and ugly moments she can't no longer escape. And Neji is her only option for comfort. And I highly doubt he will have a problem with it.
As much as a love Neji/Tenten pairing I see feel like Sasuke would be a better choice but he isn't around to be and actually option. So I kinda feel bad for him in that regard.
Thanks for writing such a fun fan fiction and look forward to your next update.
| dianalovely1995 chapter 26 . 4/7
I seriously cannot get enough of this story! I actually just finished rereading for the 3rd time I think.
| AonoKenshi chapter 26 . 4/6
It's intense and it actually makes sense.
It seems like you've done your research,
At least metaphorically...
(Or is it idiomatically I have no clue)
| Aquarius Galuxy chapter 26 . 4/5
OMG AN UPDATE THANK YOU! ! ! ! !
ahhhh noooo we don't get to see how that evening unfolded! I wanted to know what happened between Neji and Tenten on New year's! ! ! ! ! :(
Tenten's new position does seem very convenient - the people at Shinji's office think she's his fling.. I do wonder what will happen when she closes the case :P
Hmm, Daichi and Fumiko are getting married? I wonder if Tenten will get into any more trouble with Daichi?
LOL at "my cousin was prying" "my cousin was being spiteful"
Tenten is wearing Neji's necklace! ! ! ! ! OMG!
The whole Neji-Tenten-Hitomi thing was eye-opening. I assume nothing happened on New Year's day lol :P Very interesting to see Tenten being her true self around Hitomi, and Hitomi knowing that she and Neji are both agents and working on the same case. (STILL waiting for Neji and Tenten to kiss lol)
and OMG Hitomi was the one to go to Suzune's place to set things right! :O I wonder if the agent Suzu was taking care of is in any way related to this case?
Wondering if Hitomi will join the case - it sure would make things a lot simpler for Neji and Tenten lol :P Had no idea she already suspected Tenten right from the start! Well, kind of, since she did a favor for Tenten so Tenten owed her :P It feels strange watching Tenten throw herself around Hitomi's apartment though. I wonder if Hitomi suspects anything about the relationship Neji has with Tenten? Is Tenten still wearing Sasuke's necklace?
I wonder if Neji knew his father better than Hitomi did?
So now Neji and Tenten are awkward lol :P I wonder when they'll get to discuss things between themselves lol :P
... lol Tenten responded to her own name... the very thing Sasuke warned her against lol
Hmmm Tenten didn't pretend to fumble with the can of coffee, huh? :P
I wonder what Daichi wanted to talk to Hitomi about :o
Wonder what Tenten dreamed about that was so horrible? Ughhhh it was so bittersweet, the part where she wondered if this was what it was like to know Neji as others knew him :(
Hmmm - Neji's "my being there, reaching out to you" - I wonder what importance it held to him?
lol Neji's still jealous of Sasuke ;)
OH Neji changed his codename. Rising from the ashes, huh? ;) ughhh my heart. so bittersweet when Tenten was on the verge of saying Prodigy... and OH Phoenix to Tenten's Dragon, huh? oh my heart is fangirling
ahhhh Tsunade pops right out at the mention of Oracle
LOL Tsunade muttering about Hyuugas
Hmmmm so Hitomi's going to join Neji and Tenten?
LOL Tenten's email address. I wonder what the full address is?
so is Tenten wearing Neji's necklace? I see how it's helpful to the case now ;)
Enjoyed the descriptions of the love hotel :P
ahhhhh they didn't kiss :P I think it might help her nightmares if Tenten slept next to Neji lol :P
but I totally appreciate Tenten holding on to Neji's warmth.. Wonder how bad tenten's memories are :( but YAY I'm glad things are okay between them again! ! ! !
this was so bittersweet omgggg my heart! I wonder if that line "I'm not going to lead you on" was something Neji said to her? Or was it someone else?
but Neji doesn't mind being led on :( at least they got to hugg omg omg :) :) I'm fangirling with a huge grin. Tenten should just get Neji to sleep with her LOL
I can't wait for the next update omg :P how close are we to the end? ;)
Thank you so much for the update! ! ! !
- are you evening listening
- but one thing all together (another thing altogether?)
| AonoKenshi chapter 25 . 3/1
It's surprising how complex and captivating this story is...
| Aquarius Galuxy chapter 25 . 3/1
Thank you thank you thank you for the update! ! ! !
At first, I was like, Hmmm Hitomi's history chapter - wonder how you'd capture reader interest with this - and then you brought in Hizashi (omg! :O) and Kurenai! I love how you have all these little bits of sentences that show how people are trying to hide something, like Hizashi stopping himself from saying certain things, and Hizashi telling Kurenai that Hitomi is different :P
And omg Neji's mother was pregnant?!
Was Hizashi even bringing Hitomi away with permission? :o or does Haruka simply not care? (I feel sorry for Hitomi - Haruka is ugh :( )
Love the comparisons between Hizashi and Hiashi! and omg Hizashi wanting Neji to marry someone he loves - I teared up at that :( Wonder if he told Neji the same? Possibly. Actually, I wonder if Neji's change of heart, since breaking up with Tenten, was because of something Hizashi said to him?
Ahhhh so Kurenai is the one to finetune Hitomi's abilities, and teach her about the dampening stones... I loved the bit about Kurenai making Hizashi take Hitomi shopping - his heavy sigh is totally like Neji omg :P and the amount of money he makes! ;) I'm thinking Neji and Tenten have enough to retire on? :P
The tarot cards were a nice touch - but omg the death card is awfully foreboding :( and Kurenai talking about Hizashi's next child - I don't remember any mention of Neji's siblings...
So nice of Hizashi to want to help Hitomi! I can see how Hitomi was close to Hizashi in a way that Neji would later come to resent :P
And we get introduced to little Neji omg!
... something bad is going to happen to Neji's mother, isn't it? :( interesting how Hitomi was able to push an image onto Neji, and how Neji was so keen on proving himself through a game :P love how Hitomi read him, even if she can't read his thoughts :P and the bit about Neji's sister omg :O
Interesting how Hitomi altered Haru's memories... I wonder why the servants around Hitomi keep changing? Love how you likened it to a carousel and Neji to a dark, silent pool :P
Oh damn it Hizashi :( I wonder where Hitomi got that memory from - or was it just a vision? :(
Omg first Hizashi, and then Neji's sister? :( :( damn it
Need to mention that I liked how Hizashi was all "I help protect the Hyuuga clan from the inside"
Cool that Hitomi has been in Konoha and even had missions/tasks and a code name :P
Totally enjoyed the capturing scene and how you described the agents as ants ;)
And I love that Akira and Suzune are in here too (or at least, Suzu got a mention)! And omg mentions of Tenten with Neji - Tenten's aura fluttering? I wonder if they've got together yet?
I like how Hitomi is able to 'see' into rooms- kind of like the modern day version of Byakugan ;)
Hiashi wearing suits instead of hakama... I wonder if that's to remember Hizashi by :( nice too that he could tell what Hitomi thought by looking at her :o
Ahhhh so Neji's involvement with Tenten helped void the engagement... I wonder about Neji's mother - haven't actually heard much about her through the story. Wonder what Haruka was positive that Hitomi would learn one day?
Love how Hiashi is all "I don't want you living with common people" ;)
Thank you soooo much for the update! I enjoyed reading it a lot - wonder how much of this Neji needs to know. Also hoping he gets to spend some time with Tenten while she's still drugged ;)
| jazzberryjuice chapter 1 . 2/28
So I visited the Updated Stories on a complete whim, and came across this, which is, without question, the BEST thing that has happened to me all day. I am absolutely blown away, and it's only the first chapter. I loved how exciting, descriptive, and fast-paced your writing is.
Although, there's this one part in the middle when Prodigy says "I won't bite, Tenten," right before he chastises her for "protocol." Did he just slip up?
And speaking of Sasuke... I'd assumed Prodigy was Neji the very first time he was mentioned! Maybe I missed a lot of clues or I've been reading too many sappy Nejiten fics (can't be good for my health, but you know)-either way, totally blindsided.
This really deserves way more recognition; I'll see what I can do about that. (;
| Aquarius Galuxy chapter 24 . 1/31
Thank you thank you thank you for updating!
So glad we finally find out more about Lucia - I think it ties in well with the scientist party. Seems that Lucia isn't really an awful bad drug, but more of something that can lead to bad consequences in the wrong hands, like what happened to Tenten :( I was pretty surprised that Daichi and the rest just volunteered the information so readily - all Neji had to do was ask. lol Somehow it feels like things are going pretty smoothly on the investigation side for Neji and Tenten - Neji getting a sample, and even inside info on where the drug comes from, and little side details.
I am interested to know how Tenten will react with Neji when the drug kicks in - she has plenty of powerful memories with him, I'm sure... are they going to kiss? (please please please - I'm begging omg ;) )
Totally wasn't expecting Hitomi to pull the kiss on Tenten - could've been pretty disastrous in the Kazu situation... And I was wondering if Hitomi would pull info from Tenten, but it turns out that her source is Daichi (who has pretty much just childhood memories of Tenten, which is not too dangerous, I suppose).
Appreciate the reminder about the favor (does the mention mean Hitomi is going to use it soon?), as well as the kidnapping... I wasn't expecting Tenten's exchanges with Fumiko and Michiru - now they (plus Hitomi) are in on her real personality... what implications will that have on the case? I'm also surprised that Hitomi doesn't know (or hasn't acknowledged) that they're there because of the Lucia case... does she even know that the drug is being cracked down upon? I guess not :P
Also loved the insights into Tenten from Neji's perspective... I wonder what Shinji thinks about Neji not actually having slept with Miyako... And that tea sounds awesome (just not with the drug) ;)
I enjoyed the explanations about the characters too (and the new year tradition was a really great way to tie them all in) - Kazu trying to search for his sister, and why Fumi is so attached to Daichi. Is Michiru's "I guess I'm not the only one good at acting" referring to Tenten or Daichi being a good actor? :o I didn't interpret Miyako's interactions with him as flirting... kinda strange how everyone's telling her not to break him and Fumiko apart :o
Totally looking forward to Neji getting all furious about the Kazu-Tenten incident... he's not going to be happy lol ;) ;) It was really nice of Fumiko to help Miyako though - she's a deeper character than I assumed, wonder what else there is to her?
Wonder what Tenten's best and worst parts of the year are... Is Neji going to ask? ;) Wellll but then again, she's not going to be too happy with him about the fiance thing :(
Also wondering what Hitomi thinks about Neji and Miyako - she knows how Neji is... and playboy Neji is uncharacteristically? protective over Miyako... is she going to connect the dots about Tenten? She knows how Neji is very uncertain about something... and she also knows that Miyako isn't quite Miyako... of course from the reader's perspective, we all know how Neji and Tenten have a lot of history together :P
And why did Hitomi drug Miyako? ? ? ? totally curious.
I like how Tenten is all over Neji's scent ;) ;)
Okay now I'm curious about the Test - how bad was it?
Very interesting how you're tying the characters together with this new Aoki person... I actually liked how you had Tenten remember her past targets in Kazu...
Am intrigued by Tenten needing to protect someone... I wonder how this comes into play with her relationships later on? Like with Neji? :o
I liked the repeat of the "correlation and causality" thing... it's the third time or something this has been mentioned... and Tenten should tell that to herself with regards to Neji lol ;)
Surprised that Takeshi was worse than Kazu in high school... at least he's a lot nicer now, though I can't imagine having to watch people die like he did :(
Okay... that's the end of my super-long review... so many questions lol :P Please update soon, and thank you for updating!
| AG chapter 23 . 1/18
Yesss Tenten's game face!
I do wonder how they're going to close up this mission, like whether Tenten will keep her ties with Daichi, and whether Hitomi will finally see Neji and Tenten's true faces :o
Well, at least they're still going to be sharing a bed ;)
| AG chapter 20 . 1/17
Loved this chapter too. I appreciated how you shaped Kurenai into the illusionist... very fitting. Love the whole damage control in the last bit - Just noticed that Tenten mentioned changing the chain, but not necessarily the pendant... so does that mean she's just swapped out the necklace chain, while keeping the pendant? :o
| AG chapter 19 . 1/14
Prodigy is still one of my favorite chapters to date. I love the hesitancy in it, the way they know each other, and how quickly and how well they fell together. Loved the last few explanations/ descriptions... very bittersweet. And also very sensual, and full of tension. I dunno, I'm just filled with such love amd my chest aches for them :( wonder how Lee and Gai took the news when they broke up? :o
| AG chapter 18 . 1/14
Turns out that I've still been guessing wrongly lol... so Sasuke is really not part of this mission and Hiashi said all that to Neji while knowing that Neji is going back undercover. So bittersweet knowing that Neji is willing to give up so much, and pull second chances and stuff just for Tenten. Did he have control over how much he was in the spotlight before he had to quit being a spy though? :o
Lol I stilll would love to know what filthy things Neji could/had said to Tenten ;)
I wonder if Lee and Gai knew just how close Tenten and Neji were? :o
I love Neji's 'Takeshi isn't fit for a dragon', with the added layer that that's Tenten's codename ;)
Totally enjoyed their dinner conversation... all the masks and the hidden meanings ;)
| AG chapter 17 . 1/14
Lol I can't believe how off I was while speculating in my review for this chapter - Neji's code 'I'm here for you' actually really refers to the mission... he is very perceptive in a sensory way, that kind of reminds me of Hitomi... like how he senses the presence of people and stuff :o was surprised that Hitomi didn't realize Neji and Tenten were in the closet, though I guess they might not have been thinking, and were just watching instead.
Love Neji's drunken persona ;) and how Tenten didn't want him to leave - did the kiss change her mind? ;)
Still wondering about the New Year's meeting... we aren't even there yet!
| AG chapter 16 . 1/14
I forgot to mention in the previous review that I totally smiled when Hitomi told Miyako that the apple pendant didn't suit her XD the perfume though - I guess Miyako wearing it is fine, since it's not really Tenten wearing it, but her cover :P
Interesting that Tenten never found out about the engagement... I also liked that Neji saw Suzu briefly and recognized her :P
Am thinking Hitomi's apartment being on the 13th floor is a nod to her being a 'monster' :P
I wonder what Neji's taste in apartment rooms is like :P sorry to hear that Neji is scared when it comes to Tenten... but it's bittersweet and good :P wonder what he meant by Sasuke being a wild card. Also interesting that his dream was kind of a foreshadow - tenten going down wide stairs in a red dress. Guess we know why he needed to be the one walking her down ;)
Totally snickered at Neji thinking himself better than Hitomi ;)
Haha! Hitomi's remark on winning a woman who's bound to her job... that is totally the story of Neji's life lol :P
I love smug Neii lol :P
Am appreciating Hitomi's abilities a lot better now - funny how Neji's all 'who is Miyako' when he's able to read her just from Hitomi's memory of her ;)