|Reviews for PKMN2K10|
| Aiselne Phoenix Nocturnus chapter 23 . 3/3
Greetings and salutations, Dynasty! I return (at last!) with another lengthy review for you. ;)
First, overall, let me tell you I had a blast reading this chapter, especially whenever Ash, Roxie, Holiday, and Doc were concerned. They’ve made quite a quartet in recent chapters, so much so that they’re almost like a new “Ash n’ company.” Not that I’m expecting the four of them to suddenly up and travel the world together, but they’ve certainly had one hell of an adventure across Saffron City (going on Lavender Town). And so far it’s only been one night, too!
We’ve gotten to see different sides of Ash’s adolescent personality throughout this fanfic already, but daaamn, this chapter was a whirlwind! In one episode alone, Ash gets drunk, high, undergoes lesbian fantasies, cross-dresses, and…oh, yeah, becomes a pastry-prophet (THAT was a hoot)! *applause* You pulled out all the stops, Dynasty! XD It has been such fun reading about Ash’s deviant side lately. Sure, much of the stuff he’s tried has been under Roxie, Doc, or Holiday’s influence, but Ash hasn’t exactly been adverse, either. In a way, I think Ash is welcoming this rebellious, teenage stage in his life, and I’ll bet it’s a release for him, too, considering all the depressing shit Ash suffered through earlier in this fic.
I do wonder how this chapter might’ve transpired if Ash hadn’t been quite so wasted (probably a lot less hilarious, hehe). But I can’t badger the boy’s behavior too much; there were plenty of times throughout this chapter when Ash’s good-boy conscience broke through, remembering his mom’s teachings and such, proving that Ash is still Ash no matter what mischief he gets into. Yet, as this chapter transpired, I noticed Ash became less and less worried about Delia, until the ending when “She didn't stand before him in his minds eye with conscience in one hand and guilt in the other.” Granted, Ash was totally high by the end of this chapter, but hey, he’s growing up and in the long run I think this episode will prove to be yet another learning experience. And I am curious to see how Ash might react to his behavior once he gets all this craziness out of his system. Woo boy!
Moving onto other characters, I couldn’t help but notice Domino’s cameo in this chapter. I’ve always been fond of her for some reason. And since I’m such a sucker for psychologically-ill characters, I loved the spin you took with Sabrina’s mental attack on Domino’s mind, completely ruining the young Rocket’s sanity. Don’t ask me why, but I always suspected Domino was a little unstable to begin with, but in this story Sabrina definitely nailed put the nail in her coffin. I loved Sabrina’s last words, too: “Please, never send me flowers again.” Despite Sabrina’s friendlier personality change after meeting Ash and friends, Domino’s demise proves that Sabrina can still be a dangerous psychic who should never be messed with.
Max, Dawn, and Brock had brief roles in this chapter, but I found Dawn’s portrayal pretty damn impressive. She’s grown quite a backbone and she’s not afraid to even put Brock, her elder, in his place or boss him around. This is behavior we’d expect from girls like Misty, whereas I always found Dawn to be a tad more girlish, polite, and less confrontational than tomboys like Misty or May. But now, seeing Dawn’s temper and her determination to help Max, I rather like seeing her spunky side.
Finally learning about Roxie’s past with Billy, I’ve grown a new appreciation for the girl. For the past few chapters we’ve seen her as a wild punk-rocker, and it’s been a blast to read, but I like the extra layer you’ve given her personality—specifically the more serious, hurt side thanks to Billy. I’m especially pleased that, despite the intense pain Roxie obviously suffered/suffers, it doesn’t stop her from being herself. You’re great with developing multi-dimensional characters, Dynasty.
Probably my favorite part of this chapter was Holiday’s backstory. Again, I’m fond of characters with psychological issues, and I’m very intrigued by the concept of Holiday’s Aura being “dead.” It explains a lot about his personality we’ve read throughout this story. And, of course, I admire your handling of his personality, Dynasty. At first glance, a person who’s Aura is dead might be assumed to posses a “dead” personality, yet Holiday’s anything but boring, monotone, or dead. Yeah, he can be a total douchebag sometimes but that’s part of his charm and I know I wouldn’t want him any other way.
Oh, and the Rhyhorn gag had me rolling in stiches! XD I love Holiday’s poetic irony with “situated atop the Rhyhorn.” Yet, when the time comes to tweet a selfie (with puckered lips and smack-dab in the middle of being chased by bouncers, no less), Holiday texts: "Chillin...with...my...boy. Finna...ride... his...big...ol'...Rhyhorn” – the precise wording he was so hell-bent on Doc NOT saying! I think we need to start issuing Doc some awards for being able to put up with this guy.
So again, such fun with this episode, Dynasty! Such fun! What a trip this chapter was for both the characters and the readers! I enjoyed every moment and can’t wait to see what goodies you’ve got in store next time.
P.S. I’d love it you went through with writing about J’s history, either part/separate from this fanfic. Already, I’m very fascinated with what you’ve done with her character, and I can see you doing great things with her as far as the pre-anime storyline is concerned. No pressure, of course, but just so you know. :)
| Roogs chapter 23 . 2/21
Wow. I started reading this fic this past summer, and just now got caught up on it (and, consequently, try to not be lazy and actually give feedback). I gotta say, this is a heluva story you're writing.
Your characterizations and dialogue are very entertaining, and spot on for the most part. Ash is consistently someone who you want root for, because he's a good guy who doesn't cave into the pressures of the world, which is partly why I think your story works so well. You're throwing so much at the guy all at once and he hasn't cracked. Okay, I guess he has a little sometimes, but he's persistent and determined. The anime, for all its flaws, has kept those two things intact throughout its run, and so have you.
And you also make sure to give focus to the Pokemon! You'd be surprised how many decently written fics out there completely forget about the Pokemon, with only the occasional mention of Pikachu. World Building is important, and I've enjoyed what you've given us so far (I liked the detail about the guy in Vermillion city with the Machoke).
Silver as Ash's dad is an interesting interpretation (one that is apparently kinda popular, as I discovered after doing some more reading), and the scene with him, Delia, and Ritchie was adorbs. Poor Ritchie, by the way. I like this little sub plot. Uranium is an interesting, if enigmatic, character. I'll be honest, I was a little "eh" about Roxie's introduction into the story, but the way her backstory was expanded actually made me like her, something I didn't think I would ever feel towards a stereotypical "rockstar" character.
I've had mixed feelings about Doc and Holiday from the get go. On the one had, they're assholes. But on the other hand, they function better in this story than Team Rocket would because the TRio is goddamn likable. Don't get me wrong, I think you've managed to make the both of'em sympathetic, but at the end of the day they're bad guys, the antagonists of the story (obviously not the "big bad"), and I wanna see their asses get kicked.
Speaking of the TRio, I'd like to see them appear more prominently at some point, but that's just me. Now, Dawn, Brock, and Max have veeeery interesting story, and I really like this whole thing where we get to see Max progress as a trainer. I hope Dawn and Brock don't get into too much of a tiff with each other! And, y'know, I wanna see Max live too.
I realize this is a haphazard review, but I just wanted to voice my support and admiration. Good stuff, and please, keep it up!
| Aiselne Phoenix Nocturnus chapter 22 . 1/30
I thought it was rather sweet of Ritchie to seek Silver to discuss his sexual encounter with Uranium. Regardless of the significant age gap between the two characters, it’s proof that Ritchie trusts (and respects) Silver for matters outside the realm of Pokemon. Delia’s little reactions to their talk was comical, too. :)
And (I think) it’s so typical of Ritchie to take his relationship (for lack of a better word) with Uranium to heart. The start of this chapter listed all the reasons why he liked her: as a battler, as a person-aka. reasons *aside* sex, which tells me that Ritchie is definitely looking for something more between him and her. Uranium, by comparison, seems content with things as they are; casual yet spontaneous. She’s an enigma, and you can’t blame Ritchie for wondering, especially if he’s worried about being used. And then there’s always the question about “who” taught Uranium those moves in the first place, and it’s no wonder why Ritchie feels intimidated. Poor kid. Adolescence is tough enough, yet Ritchie’s case is compounded by his attraction to such a complicated person.
I was also impressed by Ritchie’s forwardness in asking if Silver played a part in the boy’s new Gym Leader position. Ritchie’s the kind of person who wants to do things right—to do the right thing with Uranium, as well as doing the right thing with his career. But Silver’s right, too. In reality, raw talent and good intentions aren’t always enough to succeed. But like Ritchie, I am glad that Silver’s recommendation wasn’t the “only” factor taken into Lance’s decision—and I’m even gladder that Silver was honest about it, too.
Delia’s comment about Silver’s teenage naivety was cute—reminiscent of our dear Ash, naturally. Evidently, Ketchums have been “fighters not lovers” long before Ash’s generation. ;) Some things just run in the family.
Roxie’s concert was fun to read (and I regret to say I did not catch the Point Break or Mastodon references, so please bear with me). I absolutely loved the gritty imagery of drugs and sex used to illustrate her inner angst. And I liked Roxie and Holiday’s relationship, how it offered some interesting tidbits about Holiday’s past (and the later mini-flashback about Doc and Kazuo was nice, too).
Ash’s opinions of the concert were amusing, especially for somebody so unaccustomed to music, never mind metal of all genres. It brought out Ash’s innocence, but his boyishness didn’t last long when Dan’s statistical graph came into play. Bravo to Ash for not being intimidated. “Nothing was going to stand in his way; not this Aura crap, not predictions, and certainly not some stupid guitar playing douche-bag and his bullshit graph.” Not that I’d blame Ash if he did slip into gloominess after being told so bluntly that the odds were against him—the poor kid always seems to be taking one step forward and two steps back lately. But instead, Ash isn’t allowing himself to get bogged down by such factors, and that really is worth commending. He really is learning how to roll with the punches now.
But after everything Ash has undergone in this fic, and all his mature changes, it’s nice to be reminded that he *is* still young at heart. I melted with adoration at the scene where Ash and Pikachu ogle the pizza-train restaurant, opposed to the clubs, tattoo parlors, and other nighttime hangouts where teenagers would surely gravitate. Ash isn’t quite into that stage just yet, bless him. Best of all, he’s not ashamed to admit his interest in holding onto his ever-shortening childhood, either. :3 Now that’s the proud Ash Ketchum I know and love, always sticking up for himself, even amidst the most trivial of matters.
Ash and Roxie’s second-hand clothing venture was a hoot, especially how Roxie kept encouraging Ash to loosen up. Figures, after all that time in the Corps, learning self-discipline and control, Ash is probably wound a bit too tightly for a girl of Roxie’s comfort. One extreme or the other. Even funnier was Roxie and company’s little toast to “Haimon” (especially Holiday’s “left nut” comment. XD Eloquent, isn’t he? “Mad fancy” is right, Holly). I’m not naive enough to think that Ash, Doc, and Holiday are becoming BBFs here, but it’s nice to see them on semi-friendlier terms (and it reminds me of those instances where Team Rocket and Team Twerp would work together and so forth). Perhaps I’m just a sucker for these types of relationships, but as you know, I do prefer “gray” characters who aren’t 100% “good” or “bad,” and they can have their moments of leaning towards both sides of the friend/enemy spectrum.
J’s return was explosive in the literal and metaphorical senses, a terrific action sequence for sure. Although I feel kinda’ silly for admitting that my personal favorite part of J’s segment (in this chapter) was the mentioning of Miyamoto being her ex-partner. Makes me wonder how Jessie might react if she ever knew. But as I mentioned earlier, I really enjoyed this chapter’s small insights into the antagonists’ pasts—Holiday’s, Doc’s, and J’s—not full-blown explanations of how these characters came to be, but tidbits to satisfy the curious readers whilst keeping them wondering what we might learn next. Again, it gives these characters more dimension, and makes them all the more likeable (yes, even characters like J who are extremely cruel).
Overall, another fun chapter, Dynasty. :) Roxie was definitely the highlight and I’m looking forward to seeing what she’ll do next in this fic. Until next time!
| PolarDawn chapter 23 . 1/2
I can't tell you how many times Doc and Holiday have made me laugh. This chapter was no exception. I am also interested to see how this whole thing with Roxie turns out. Keep it coming!
| Bittersweet Romanticide chapter 23 . 12/31/2013
Sorry I haven't reviewed much. I'm not very good at reviewing, really. I mean, not unless I sit down and do it like an essay.
Anyway, these past couple of chapters have been kind of enjoyable, but it's a bit weird having this much filler in what has previously been a tight, well paced story. It suddenly came to this grinding halt when it was moving so quickly before. So, I hope that it picks up again soon! I'm still very interested in the plot, after all.
| Nauran chapter 23 . 12/29/2013
Thought for sure this chapter was going to open with Ash waking up in someone else's bed... Ah, well. This was way more fun!
So this time we get a little deeper into the plot and what the heck we're doing here. Doc and Holiday's bizz and Ash and Roxie's bizz. And Sabrina's.
Not bad for his first real night out, eh?
And, not gonna lie, that stuff about Holiday is actually pretty saddening. I kinda wanna see a heel-face turn from him now.
Thanks for this closer so close to 2014. See you on the other side!
| wheathermangohanssj4 chapter 23 . 12/29/2013
...No...just...no...*sigh*...why did Ash have to do drugs?...it's...pointless...and wrong...he's just straight up not Ash anymore. He was already Drunk he didn't need to be high...That coulda just been how he was when drunk...but no you decided to write a sceen where they get kicked out so you could get him to do drugs...everything after the bar is pointless. Holiday's backstory could of been said there too...I'm just hating this Arc...end it already and stop with the filler of pointless scene changes. I don't want to read ash doing these things...THESE PEOPLE ARE VILLIANS why should I care why? You beat the team and save the day...I want to see them get their comeuppance...but you're never gonna give me tat because you just have to keep those two idiots in this story...oh and Holiday has Aura problems...great he's gonna be redeemed...fuck him.
| Aiselne Phoenix Nocturnus chapter 21 . 12/23/2013
Uranium’s situation was one hell of a way to kick off this chapter, and in a very good way, too. I’m glad she didn’t back down to Giselle, but at the same time I’m glad she chose to be the better person and not start a fistfight (even though Giselle damn well earned a few punches as far as I’m concerned. It didn’t surprise me that she and her cronies sought revenge against Uranium, but the vandalism felt a tad too excessive—overkill, just like Giselle’s haughty personality). Based on Uranium’s court history, I’m quite proud that she restrained her urge to fight, proving she obviously learned something from her therapist. The best part was her giving the club keys to Joe, too—maybe it’ll teach the boy to finally man-up to Giselle once and for all. *Somebody’s* gotta knock Giselle off her high horse.
I have to say I appreciated Ritchie’s musings about the differences between “talent” and “connections” when it comes to League successors. It’s no different than real life careers; in many cases, career placement is dependent on recommendations by certain people, not necessarily the applicant’s abilities. Anybody who’s job-searched in this day and age can easily relate to Ritchie’s wonderings, and misgivings, about whether or not he belongs amongst the League’s crowd. *raises hand*
Ritchie’s battle against his “little voice” was a hoot, too, something I’d expect from such a conscientious (never mind pubertal) boy like him. He’s always such a “nice guy,” not that what he’s doing with Uranium (or rather, what she’s doing to him) is necessarily bad—and based on Ritchie’s little voice, I’d say it’s anything BUT bad! ;) But it’s so in-character for Ritchie, I think, being riddled with so many sex-related concerns—self-consciousness, wondering how many other guys Uranium slept with, wondering “where” their relationship is going (if it *is* going anywhere), etc. Whenever the anime compared Ash and Ritchie as trainers, Ritchie was always the wiser, rational, and better-prepared boy, and I doubt he only acts that way around Pokemon. Of course, leave it to a girl like Uranium to completely turn Ritchie’s world upside-down. Opposites attract! Uranium is something else, alright.
Everything Ghestis believes about mankind’s success being credited to Pokemon is 100% true. They *are* the dominant species, and it’s rather hilarious to think that humans, the technically lesser-species, ignorantly believe that they are superior to (never mind “equals” and “friends” with) the creatures. And great irony with Ghestis and Max unsuspectingly crossing paths like that. Even better was how Ghestis corrected Max, telling the boy his Onix was female, not male—I adore Max, but the boy being so observant/studious as he is, I figured he might’ve been sharp enough to notice his Pokemon’s gender sooner. It’s an innocent (albeit rookie) mistake, though, considering Onix doesn’t exactly fit the stereotype for “girly” Pokemon like, say, Jigglypuff or Clefairy. But I was surprised that Max went through with releasing Onix, though less surprised that Ghestis suggested it in the first place—but like Brock said, it *was* Max and Onix’ joint decision so I can’t point the full blame on Ghestis for merely offering his “advice.” I am glad that Max came to the realization quickly (and of his own accord) that he has to return to Union Cave and undo his mistake.
If you ask me, it’s high-time Delia was given the opportunity to voice her grievances (outside *and* inside canon). She always maintains a smile and stiff upper lip—that’s one of her many admirable attributes—but she’s only human, too. I love Delia for never standing in the way of her family’s dreams, for never putting herself before others, but in no way does her selflessness insinuate that she’s oblivious to the loneliness. For that reason, frankly, it would be less natural if Delia were 100% okay with her husband’s (and son’s) careers 100% of the time. And I’m glad Silver doesn’t begrudge his wife the opportunity to vent her frustrations, either—not to mention plan a little trip for the couple. :3
Ash and Misty’s day together was a blast to read. Although both characters have changed with age, the playful dynamics of their relationship remain intact; teasing each other, and so forth. I got the biggest kick out of Misty’s sisters ogling Ash, though. XD I can’t yet decide who was more embarrassed by that escapade: Ash, for being near-molested by Misty’s fangirlish sisters, or Misty, for bearing witness to the entire thing. Either way, it was hilarious! And it figures that Ash would be totally oblivious to his becoming eyecandy for the ladies (and typical of Misty for trying to ignore her hormones, no less).
Doc and Holiday are always a pleasure. I love how crudely honest they are with each other, especially Doc in this chapter listing Holiday’s finest attributes: "Poor taste in clothing." / "Being an impossibly huge douche-bag." / "Eating. Napping?" / "Stop me if I get it right: Whining. No?" – The guys call each other “bro,” but they could easily be mistaken for actual brothers, too, and I’ve immensely enjoyed that aspect about their relationship.
I really applaud Sabrina in this episode, having the (literal) foresight to know Ash needed a meal first before his badge. It’s nice to see the more “human” side of Sabrina, considering her change of heart after she met Ash five years ago. Not to mention, it’s nice when her supernatural abilities are used outside battle for everyday—yet still important—needs. Don’t get me wrong; I like it when Sabrina acts like a badass psychic gym leader, but I also know my heart melted the moment she grabbed Ash and ordered supper for him. I leads me to believe that Sabrina would be a fine aura mentor for Ash who would both teach him, and perhaps understand him, too. I’m really looking forward to how Sabrina’s mentoring will transpire…after Ash’s little obligatory mission with Holiday and Doc, of course. ;)
With that, thank you again for another fine chapter, Dynasty. Thank you, as always, for your patience with me, too. A very happy holiday and new year to you and your loved ones, my friend!
| PolarDawn chapter 6 . 12/21/2013
Normally I wouldn't review a chapter of a story that isn't the newest, but I just have to say that I don't think I have ever laughed at a fanfiction as hard as I did at the end of this chapter and the beginning of the next. Thats some damn fine comedy right there, my friend. Kudos!
| Nauran chapter 5 . 12/9/2013
Sorry, didn't have time before, but this is just a bit more I had to say on Chapter 22.
This was what I was talking about! The original ideas for these situations! I mean, everyone loves "the night out" and the situation is definitely ripe with opportunity for laughs and drama; beer, parties and whatnot. But the fact that all these characters have played off each other so well (heck even Sabrina got in on it and that part made me laugh quite a lot!) shows that more than anything the characters are what drive the story.
Even if this was a "filler" chapter, it was no less entertaining than if it weren't.
I've just gotta ask; where do you get these characters? Their personalities? Their attitudes?
| Nauran chapter 22 . 12/9/2013
Oh, god the entire thing with Ash, Doc, Holiday and Roxie was beyond perfect! I can't get over how enthralling and hilarious it is! Love her characterization by the way.
This story takes me back to the days of little Nauran Jr being impatient for the next chapter.
| wheathermangohanssj4 chapter 22 . 12/4/2013
...*sigh* is it too much to ask for the Story of the main charecter to actually be progressed...? and you have failed as a writing to make me care about the OC of Doc and Holly so when they go off I can't even be bothered to remember what they're doing...I feel like even though I should like the length of this chapter...I didn't get anything out of it... and lets face it, you do not update enough where Filler is a good thing.
And no Danimal that is not they way math works expecially SATS, expecially not the way it would work in Pokemon Anime, where training is more a sport then a game.
| 26Naruto26 chapter 8 . 10/29/2013
Could be a good story, it jumps to much between points of view,
| Nauran chapter 21 . 9/30/2013
Huh. Ash has got game. Must be the corpsman abs. Either Sabrina's messing with him or that was an... elicitation? Let's go with that.
Oh, man, I can't believe these three are gonna be grouped together for a while. This is just priceless! Please let the shenanigans between these three roll on and on like a Goldenrod Gym Miltank.
Do you have the entire story all planned out?
How do you come up with these dramatic and comedic situations? Character driven? Or do you have a source for your ideas? (That egg thing was hilarious)
Looking forward to the next instalment!
| wheathermangohanssj4 chapter 9 . 9/29/2013
Okay ... I haven't activly watched the pokemon Anime in years...so I don't know who this paul guy really is...but...reading that Ash lost to the contrivance that you wrote, which I don't mind it worked to set up the story, and that Ash's Rival for that season when on to win it all, just entesifies how much of a contivance it was and just makes me wanna roll my eyes. Other then that I've enjoyed this story so far, and will continue to read to see where this is going.