|Reviews for The hard way|
| yellow 14 chapter 1 . 11/9/2010
Sound like she was far too good for him, whoever he was. Keep writing
| Schermionie chapter 1 . 9/16/2010
I was expecting femmeslash due to the genre, so I was a bit surprised by this - but I read to the end, anyway. Susan's line of thought was interesting, and I wanted to see where it went.
To be frank, I don't think the flashback worked at all. The place you put it in was very awkward - rather than augmenting and backing up the story, it actually interrupted and overshadowed it. You described the first time Hannah found her ex cheating in the normal narrative, which worked just fine, so I'm not sure why you changed the tone so much and put the next account in a flashback. It wasn't particularly polished. Furthermore, the content of the flashback was rather predictable, and in my opinion it was unnecessary to have it so long, not to mention it unbalanced the story. You could have used that space to develop the actual story of this more, but instead, the narrative abruptly cut off and then resumed and it was a bit awkward.
A minor nitpick is with the title - all the words should be capitalised.
I do think you worked pretty well with first person, which a lot of people struggle with, and I liked the theme of learning things the hard way. It seemed appropriate for Hufflepuffs above all to understand such a concept. I think you definitely chose the right characters, and I found myself considering the strengths and flaws in both arguments they presented.
Keep writing. :)