|Reviews for Mass Effect: Going Dark|
| thedude19859 chapter 2 . 1/30/2014
Just got finished reading the first chapter and I'm already hooked i really liked it can't wait to read the rest probably gonna have a few sleepless nights
| Ozymandeos chapter 39 . 10/27/2013
Very nice run so far, though I probably did way worse on my ACT than I should have due to reading this when I should have studied. Worth it though.
Something tells me that this suggests a sequel.
| AlsoKnownAsMatt chapter 39 . 10/24/2013
I've just caught up this story and like it quite a bit. You've got good characters, an interesting side-plot for the main ME timeline and although things move a little too slowly at first, the action wraps up nicely. I assume there is to be a sequel and if so, will definitely look forward to that whenever it appears.
Thanks for your obvious hard work on this story.
| DragBahamut chapter 39 . 10/17/2013
Great chapter, I've been looking forward to continuing the story. Keep up the good work.
| Progman chapter 7 . 6/3/2013
I really like the ending here. Makes me curious about what happens next.
Much better than previous chapters, but still needs a few tweaks. A lot of your narrative description reads very flat, while the events are rather interesting. It also might be a good idea to separate all of those little internal moments Kevin has in their own line, with italics. Helps humanize him. I'd also advise you to make more us of italics for word emphasis in dialogue. Really helps the reader, and makes the characters more lively. That, along with some not dialogue qaulifiers would be great additions.
There was a moment where you switched to Ralik' s POV randomly, and it was rather confusing. If this is Kevin's story, stick with him. I actually developed a very effective technique for stories with a mostly singular character focus, so let me know if you want to try it out. It's a small change, but it works wonders.
OK, so it was my understanding that sensors were not FTL, but comms and travel are. In space combat, the defenders can't see the attackers until they're already there, so the Kellius couldn't know the geth are there before the geth detect them. If it were in civilized space, you could use comm buoys for detection, ala wolf pack frigates, but Kevin's in the space boonies! D:
And wouldn't it just be "Captain blah blah vas [ship name] nar [BIRTH ship]"? Seems odd the quarian captain wouldn't address himself like that.
| Bler chapter 38 . 3/22/2013
Here is the promised review. Enjoy!
To be completely honest, I was a bit dissapointed with the ending. Not as much as the ME3 ending, but still dissapointing. It felt rather obvious that you set up Arla and Kevin to split up, only to reunite in the future. Some things just didn't make much sense, like why Kevin didn't search the wreckage for Arla's body or search the surrounding area, and why Kevin didn't try to contact the Migrant Fleet, and why Ralik didn't further pursue contacting his brother when his first attempt failed. Couldn't he just visit him on the Citadel? How will Kevin explain himself to any quarians he meets on Omega?
Just the fact that the story ends with both characters tragically separated from each other is disappointing and leaves me desperately hoping for a sequel.
Despite these examples, I very much enjoyed the story. None of the characters were Mary Sue, the plot was good (though it became a bit incredulous with the "undead" quarians and Kar's transformation), the concept was great, the combat seemed to actually be written by someone who knows what they're talking about (as a third degree black belt, I enjoyed the accuracy of the CQC and the training), and the romance was very well-developed (it wasn't the central pillar of the story, and it wasn't rushed or felt fake).
The character development was good, though some characters were more developed than others. Kevin, obviously, was the most developed (especially with the excellent use of the research logs), followed by Arla (big surprise). Other characters, like Ralik, Riik, Tyr, and Siri, failed to become full dynamic characters.
Overall, it was a very emotional fic. I smiled, frowned, laughed, sighed, cheered, and all those other emotions. Most stories never even cause a twitch on my face. But here, I'm hopeful for a sequel.
Keep up the good work!
| Progman chapter 2 . 11/22/2012
Bullet time and biotics? Sev would have a FIT if you used those in RP-oh wait...crap.
SRS REVIEW: Ship is cool. I saw it in my head. Credit symbols for a passcode...hysterical. Linus is just the worst kind of person, isn't he? Hes dead, and hes still fodder. Endless fun... So we have a ship, a VI and a man. ONWARD!
If I were a writer...I'd say you planned to use each one of those amenities during this story. :P
| Progman chapter 1 . 11/22/2012
An Udina, Futurama/KOTOR and a DBZ reference in the same chapter? You cheeky bastard.
Serious Review: You got Kevin established pretty well, and I was overjoyed when he killed Linus. And you managed to make Linus MORE unlikeable than Kevin! Though, objectivley I had no opinion on Kevin one way or the other just based off of his actions here. Pacing was rather perfect, and I was just as surprised as Linus was when he started slicing. I'm not sure if that was the point, but if it was good job! Oh, and no wasted space. Very tight and focused.
I feel cheated by Kevin's lack of fonzie pointing. "Stasis AAAAAAYYYY!".
| bale626 chapter 38 . 7/19/2012
Loved this story. Out of curiosity, when will the next installment be coming out? Anytime soon? (I hope)
| DragBahamut chapter 38 . 7/15/2012
Finally got a chance to read this new chapter. Great job, relieved to see the others survived.
| Moofis09 chapter 38 . 7/11/2012
I made an account just to comment on this. I tip my hat to you sir. This story was a wild ride from start to finish. For being your first project, I am amazed. All the characters are flushed out masterfully and the plot twists kept me on the edge of my seat as I read. The scene with Bela at the end made me shed manly tears. You definitely left an opening for a sequel too! I'm interested to see how that turns out if you go through with it. Easily one of the best ME fanfics I've read. Bravo.
| Falcon777 chapter 38 . 7/11/2012
Hooooooooolyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy craaaaaayaaaap. Dang man, you deliver again. Simply amazing. lol, and here I had thought you had killed off Arla and crew, but this is so much better. Dang, I hope you do a sequel, this story is crazy good!
| Falcon777 chapter 37 . 6/30/2012
Simply brilliant. I've been following your story for a while now, and I find it quite interesting. One of the things that makes it somewhat attractive is the fact that it doesn't follow the canon story. This of course makes it YOUR story, but it also makes it harder for people who want something familiar. The characters are very well done, though I must admit that I'm a hopeless romantic; I am very sad to see Arla die. I had honestly hoped that you wouldn't do that, however, you clearly know how to write a compelling story. Thus, I am going to continue to read your chapters. Please keep up the good work.
| CobaltAC chapter 37 . 6/30/2012
Wow. You just jossed everyone all to hell, didn't you?
That's not to say you're a bad writer or anything, it's quite the opposite in fact.
Your story is great, but that's a lot of characters to kill off in the span of a few paragraphs.
| DragBahamut chapter 37 . 6/30/2012
Another good chapter. Shame about Bela though, I liked her... tough little minx.