Renee Aubin chapter 8 . 3/12/2012
‘When she stood to exit, all the Cullen men stood, prompting Charlie to do the same.’ Cute. One imagines Charlie might have grumbled a little under his breath.

‘"Guess what I'm wearing?" Bella's brow furrowed. Had Angela become an Alice clone?’ Funny.

‘She thought of all the knowledge she could accumulate about the French language and literature above and beyond what she had learned in her three and a half years in college.’ I'm so glad your Bella has genuine intellectual curiosity and academic interests! After a promising start, the books were a big disappointment that way.

I liked the conversation with Esme about consuming blood. Stands to reason that hemophobic (is that a word?) Bella would worry about this. Also her thoughts about wanting to delay becoming a vampire are more mature than could be expected from a starry-eyed 17 year old. Your Edward has no idea how lucky he is not to have to constantly fight that whiny tide.

“the Vultures” – snort! I wonder if SM had that word in mind all along?

Bella’s not the only one in your story who has more common sense than in canon. The Quileutes “would always welcome the cold ones who helped them to keep their territory safe." Smart.

Oh, go Bella! "The Quileutes don't get to choose who I love." Certainly a different dynamic with Jacob (thank goodness).

“I could die and go to heaven at any moment, but it wouldn't be heaven for me without you." Pretty hard to dispute. And rather than endlessly badgering him, she simply makes her position clear: “There is no way I'm going to grow old and die when we could have forever together like your parents and siblings." Hooray.

‘[Carlisle] surmised that her weakened heart muscle might not be strong enough to go through the change, but if it was, her transformation would take much longer than the average three days.’ What a horrid thought, on both counts.

Yaay, Dr. Burke and Dr. Webber to the rescue! “What he's achieved as a human physician is remarkable." High praise indeed. Hey, is it possible he isn’t human?

Seattle is a gorgeous place, especially coming in by air. Nice reference to the Wizard of Oz.

I guess Renee nagging her about birth control is better than insisting that she shouldn’t risk having sex at all. I snickered that at least Renee understood “old school”.

Cute moment when Edward is helping her unpack and gets startled by the ‘wee little lingerie”. Truly this can’t be something he’s used to. Although Bella is clearly determined to broaden his horizons!

‘He wished he had found her sooner so he could have protected her from some of the things that had happened to her.’ Aww, sniffle. Good point about money and connections making all the difference in health care.

I was so impressed that Bella mumbled “Shakespeare” in her sleep! That sonnet is so lovely, but in a U of Oregon class we figured out that the poet was saying her beauty would be immortal only because he wrote the poem about her. Sigh, it’s all about his genius. But of course that’s not what Edward meant.

Again, from the medical detail I have to wonder if you’re in the field yourself – otherwise you must have done a ton of research.

Nice description of Edward’s 24/7 attention to her welfare. ‘She couldn't refuse the forlorn, little boy look on his face.’ Yeah, impossible. And this IS big progress: "I like that you now say 'when' and not 'if' you get better." She's never had this much reason to be optimistic.

Whoa, things are heating up fast until they’re interrupted! Entirely yummy. Her setting the limit of “above the waist” probably helped him relax. Even so, he lights a fire in her that could definitely have gotten out of control.

Damn, I want to smack A&J. Yes, and thank goodness they DID get their own place.

Oh, interesting problem that Charlie and Renee would oppose the planned surgery. Understandable that her small-town doctor wouldn’t recommend a cutting-edge procedure.

Hmm, C&R would accept that it’s not their place to push Bella toward a certain medical decision, because she gets married? I wonder if they really have that much respect for the institution of marriage (although in your time line they didn’t divorce). I can see how the change in status would tend to make them see Bella as an adult. And certainly B&E are smart to establish Edward’s right to make decisions in case she can’t. OK, I’ll buy it.
Renee Aubin chapter 7 . 2/26/2012
‘Esme was to interior decoration as Alice was to fashion’ – nicely said. Almost as good as ‘Rosalie did not do domestic, she just did Rosalie, Emmett… and cars.’ Snicker.

Amusing interaction with Charlie, especially his attempt to exaggerate the Bella/Jake connection.

Interesting twist when Edward is the one who has to reveal the shape-shifter story.

Refreshing that Bella can be gracious about accepting gifts, especially when there’s a sentimental connection. Ooh, the green dress from Alice sounds beautiful.

‘… when [Edward] heard less than flattering thoughts from them, he amped up the PDA with Bella.’ Take that, Forks High! ‘…the whirlwind that was Edward Cullen’ – good phrase.

Yes, things are certainly happening quickly. ‘…he was making declarations about what was his was hers. Was she in love? She hadn't said the actual words, yet’. Kind of a surprising reminder of where they are. And we understand how important the words are to Edward.

Fun introduction of Bella and her parents to the Cullens. Carlisle and Esme are so sweet to her: ‘Edward smiled an indulgent smile and struggled not to roll his eyes.’ Then ‘Emmett's blatant familiarity with Bella’ was so in character for him. I’m glad Edward was supportive that “Bella's not your personal Barbie Doll” to Alice.

I like what Charlie says: “Convince me that you're with my little girl for the long haul”. He’s direct about his concern, yet gives Edward a chance to say his piece. Stellar answer: “I have not entertained any other scenario except the one where we share a long, happy life together." Sniffle. What timing for the first time she tells him she loves him – but truly he’s irresistible.
caz1105 chapter 11 . 2/23/2012
So much enjoying your brilliant fic , wish i could get round to your home and get you writing faster! Really love your Edward (swoon). Really love your plot. Excellent all round. Take care. Lots of love xxxx
katelyndc chapter 11 . 2/13/2012
Not sure if she's completely protected, but they've been doing a heck of a job. Just wondering what the two in the car have heard or found out...and could it sway any kind of Volturi decision.

Thanks for the update-Kate
Renee Aubin chapter 6 . 2/8/2012
A sweet moment between Bella and Alice, who she calls ‘her lethal diminutive friend’. ‘Like Edward, Alice's skin was resilient and cold, but Bella embraced her just as she would any of her human friends.’ I bet Alice appreciated that. Like canon Bella, your Bella sees right through the monster to the person inside.

How convenient having Alice’s ability to see that their walk to the ballet theater will be too much for Bella. "Is this what I have to look forward to—visions, threats, and ultimatums?" Well, kind of! But at least this Edward tries to give her choices where he feels he can.

"Really, Bella, does the idea of being in my arms appall you so much?” Good question! "I just don't like looking like an invalid." She’s probably the only one who would interpret it that way, but it’s understandable given her background. Nice that while he carries her she is sensitive to the trial that close exposure to her scent creates.

"When I said we, I was referring to you and me," he said, his golden eyes locking with her brown ones. "I have no doubt that you are my mate, so what's mine is also yours." Swoon-worthy!

Clever Bella, she doesn’t miss that there’s more going on than a stare-down between Edward and Alice in the hotel hallway. How frustrating for her that she’s not ready for the evening to end, but she assumes he could use a break from close contact with her scent.

What a nice conversation with Angela – she’s lucky to have such a good friend.

Your use of the “whiplash” comment made me smile. I like that Bella doesn’t immediately jump on the “make me a vampire” bandwagon. I never felt like book Bella gave it enough thought. “I'd probably be the first vampire ever to starve to death due to my aversion to blood…” Funny, and maybe also a little bit true.

Edward is so matter-of-fact telling her that if she dies he will too. Even if he is trying to give her all the facts for her decision, this makes a heavy burden for Bella.

‘…being near death made her devoid of a filter.’ Makes sense. She asks a good question, are you so sure about us that it’s worth all the disruption to her family’s life. Her reaction to his answer is so touching.

"I dream all the time that you watch over me while I sleep.” Ooh, shiver. She doesn’t miss much, does she?
Horizon77 chapter 11 . 1/29/2012
One thing I love about your writing is that you know how to keep the pace of the story going very well. Bella's recovery could have dragged on, but you found a way to present only the important information without dwelling. It's refreshing!

About that pair about to much up the Cullens' plans...I have no idea what's going on there, but I can't wait to find out! Love this fic!
Canuckmichelle chapter 2 . 1/28/2012
ooohhh..looking forward to reading this..grew up in Laval! Interesting twist on canon..
kmfroggi chapter 11 . 1/28/2012
huh, im a little shocked that the 2 in the car got away with it so far! great chapter, i feel like these 2 are finally moving along!
Renee Aubin chapter 5 . 1/27/2012
Bella makes big points this chapter, not only assuring him she trusts him, but expressing hope that she can reciprocate helping with his health issues. The first would have surprised him, but he never would have expected the second in a million years. I can imagine this reaching back to touch that long-buried 17 year old boy who woke to find himself not only a vampire, but also suddenly an orphan.

Oh, sad that she (of course) interprets his pulling away as rejection, especially since her experience has led her to expect it. I’m glad she let the tears out, even while drawing her own boundaries: "You don't get to tell me what my options are.” Nice variation on the “whiplash” comment too. This whole scene is so well described that it plays like a movie in my head.

Enjoyed Alice’s frustration: "Are you trying to drive your one hope for happiness in this century away?"

Interesting dynamic, Edward concealing his real intentions from Alice: ‘…she would surely alert the family if she knew his intentions were to leave her human if he could, whether she turned out to be his mate or not.’

This was funny: ‘For the second time in as many hours, he had inexplicably angered a female, and he was perplexed. Despite the fact that he didn't get physically tired, it exhausted him emotionally.’ Get used to it, buddy.

Interesting that his card with the flowers starts “I am but a shell of a man…” Literally true, when you think about it, but he means emotionally inexperienced too.

Reading his card made her feel like she had received a note from Mr. Darcy.’ Perfect!

Smart girl, she learned from his skittishness at sudden contact. Nice touch that they each take the opportunity to get a good lungful of each other’s scent.

Fun conversation about movies and TV. Edward is so out of the loop! This must be a rare experience: ‘For the life of her, Bella couldn't think of a snarky reply.’ LOL.

‘Halfway through devouring her own lunch, she became fascinated with feeding him.’ Oh, no! What a good sport. They’ll have a good laugh about this once she knows the truth. Sweet – but promising – kisses after the picnic.

‘Edward was careful not to respond to the poisonous thoughts that were very often in conflict to what they actually said.’ Grrr, what a burden.

Interesting observation about Bella: ‘It was as if she was immune to the condescension and meanness most of her classmates and her roommate felt for her.’ And he compares her character to Carlisle’s – there’s no higher praise than that.

I like how Edward’s reaction to Bella’s erotic dream is so mixed, and so perplexing to him. Yet another surprise for him.

Lovely use of the “I’d like to try something” scene. Hmm, “tasted but not consumed” – she doesn’t know how lucky she is.

Ah, so he has figured out that Bella is his mate! Wow, the family gets with the program really quickly, thanks to Carlisle. It makes sense, after Edward has waited so long for Bella.

This is a good expression of Edward’s dilemma: ‘He held his breath most of the time when he was around her, but his love for her scent and the desire to be close to her made him constantly push the boundaries.’

Great job on THE conversation. Extra tense for her since they’re isolated at his remote house, but she handles it so well. I love how she takes the time to think through her own responses to this staggering revelation, before bombarding him with questions.

"Now that you know, my fate is in your hands." Wow.

"I would have been content to wonder about you and crush on you from afar…” Her willingness to give him space has been important – but now things can be so much better!

Terrific concluding lines: ‘There had been a time when she did not believe in miracles, but then there had also been a time when she did not believe in vampires. At this juncture, she was willing to believe almost anything.’
edwardbabymomma chapter 11 . 1/27/2012
Great Chapter
amymorgan chapter 11 . 1/27/2012
Hmmm? "Red herring vampires"?

All that consumes my thoughts at the moment is Edward's tongue!

Grazie mille.
DreamOfTheEndless chapter 11 . 1/27/2012
All caught up!: )Thank you for writing this:)

DreamOfTheEndless chapter 10 . 1/27/2012
Thank you for the awesome chapter. Why did she go through with this? I still think changing would have made more sense. idk...

DreamOfTheEndless chapter 9 . 1/27/2012
Awww! The wedding:) So sweet!

Thank you!

timidvampire chapter 11 . 1/27/2012
loved this, who were the two in the car?

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