Reviews for The War Bride
SanguisAnima chapter 19 . 2/19/2014
... It's been quite some time since the last update... I should very much like to see the continuation of this fic. I've been a pretty avid Lenneth follower since the VP, VP:L, and VP:S days (I haven't played VP:CotP yet, mainly since I don't have a DS)...
I've read through chapters 1 through 19, and I kinda imagine things going this way (alternate universes and all that). So with the challenge from no less than Lenneth Valkyrie herself, I'm quite expecting an epic battle... Oh, and where's the Lezard POV? *quietly snickers*
- Sanguis
AnonyGuy chapter 19 . 10/3/2012
Amazingly written. I crack up everytime I think of how much Lenneth wants Lezards LANCE. Naughty valkyrie... :D
Anmynous chapter 19 . 5/17/2012
While I can understand the irritation at a review like that one, I think it would've been better to just quietly delete it, since right now it's not so much a discussion as a flaming row where neither side wants to back off.

Personally I like Lezard BECAUSE he's a creep, that being such a rare character trait and stories involving it tend to contain new and interesting things.

I do agree the writing in this particular fic is a tad drawn out; you keep saying you have trouble getting them through the beginning of the 'ship, and it shows. It's probably caused by keeping them in-character... I have no advice to offer there.
TheAmethystWitch chapter 19 . 2/10/2012
I just got done catching up with this story yesterday, and I am glad that you are continuing with it. I am also pleased with how the story is unfolding, as well as the character interactions between Lezard and Lenneth. You write them so well; it can be seen that you genuinely enjoy writing them out.

After I read a particular review, I must say that compared to a lot of other villains that are overrated and loved in spite of their evil nature; Lezard is relatively unknown. Not to mention the VP series in general, sadly. So I say, let him have his fans, he doesn't get nearly as much attention as he deserves as a villain... at least in my opinion. Though I can't deny that I am biased when it comes to Lezard, obviously. XD

But enough of that. I really look forward to seeing how well Lezard holds up using a melee weapon, as well as Gungnir itself. I always wished that in the game he would use the divine lance a bit more in his attacks, but he was indeed a fledgling god, as you put it. And I can't wait to see how Lenneth adapts more to her situation, as well as her mission to woo Lezard into letting his guard down.

~Lord Lezard Valeth
A Nonny Mouse chapter 19 . 11/22/2011
(That was me below. I accidentally clicked the button before I had finished.)

Anyway, all I was going to add was that you might note that that review was constructive criticism, not a flame. I think LotornoMiko has potential as a writer, despite the fact that I took issue with her attitude toward Dropping an Anvil.
Guest chapter 19 . 11/22/2011
The Dragon,

You might have noticed that I actually said I LIKE Lezard. You might have noticed that, while I didn't explicitly say so, I heavily implied that I also like LezardxLenneth. You also might have noticed that I presented my reasons for doing so in a mature, intelligent manner, and never once resorted to name-calling. Yes, I called LotornoMiko out for getting defensive about her pairing preference, because what she should have done is DEFENDED it. There is a difference. She could have addressed Dropping an Anvil's queries, but she instead flippantly ignored them and slung personal insults like "loser," "idiot," etc. That is not the way to win an argument, nor is it the way to promote understanding between disagreeing parties. In fact, the only reason I responded to Dropping an Anvil in the first place was because I hated to think that he/she might take LotornoMiko's attitude as representative for ALL LezardxLenneth shippers.

And because you got all holier-than-thou about it, here's my review:

The premise is interesting, and the characters are, for the most part, in-character. (I could argue that Lezard comes across as too nice a lot of the time, but he WAS bizarrely affectionate toward Lenneth at times in the games, so I'm willing to chalk that up as alternative character interpretation. He's still obsessive and possessive enough to keep me on board.) However the prose leaves something to be desired. The narration is often unnecessarily drawn out, and a lot of the sentences are bad/awkward syntactically. Ultimately I don't think it's a GREAT fic, but it's good enough to keep me checking in every so often to see what happens.
Dropping an Anvil chapter 19 . 11/22/2011
I have a right to ask why people hold a certain opinion, that is all I am doing right. I have not demanded nor do I hold the idea that LotornoMiko has to answer.
The Dragon chapter 19 . 11/22/2011
(LotornoMiko, I am also sorry to infringe upon your review space for this reply but this question & answer session is getting ridiculous and taking away from the fact this space is for reviewing, commenting on the story NOT to hold a discussion!)

First of all, until now I have been reviewing on the content of the fan fiction which is the PROPER usage of this space. Secondly, A Nonny Mouse, 'no offense meant' but who are you that you reprimand LotornoMiko for rightfully (in my opinon) getting defensive over what is or could be considered a PERSONAL question? Choice of pairings is a personal choice and some people take their pairings VERY seriously as they write their fan-based works. I saw Dropping an anvil’s first post and while it may not have been the intent, based on how it was worded even I saw that as a personal attack on HER choice of pairings so I think a so-called ‘bratty’ tone (as you call it) just might be warranted. Thirdly, Dropping an anvil, it's great that you apologized for the misunderstanding but is LotornoMiko in any way OBLIGATED to give you an opinion you obviously think you are entitled to ask of her? Unless she chooses to divulge that of her own personal choice than the answer is clearly NO.
Dropping an Anvil chapter 19 . 11/22/2011
Thank you for your reply, A Nonny Mouse, it does help to clarify a few things for me. I will admit fascination with certain characters and their portrayals can be misinterpreted as fanboy or fangirl love at times. Nevertheless the whole "Lezard's THE MOST ROMANTIC" thing and the reasons you offered are drearily familiar to me, it really makes me wonder how much people put stock into appearance.

Still I do want to know LotornoMiko's reasoning on the matter as well.

P.S. I also apologise for using a review to respond to a review but I just wanted to leave a reply for A Nonny Mouse.
A Nonny Mouse chapter 19 . 11/22/2011
(First off, LotornoMiko, I want to apologize, because this isn't a review so much as reply to Dropping an anvil. As a fellow Lezard fan, I wanted to add my two cents in defense of the character, but as Dropping an anvil has no account nor any other way of contacting him/her, your review space was unfortunately my only option.)

Dropping an anvil,

I admittedly love Lezard-and when I say "love," I don't mean in the "man of my dreams!" sort of way. It's more that I love to hate him. He's a fantastic villain. The guy's just oozing personality. You said it yourself-he's intelligent, wry, witty, powerful, and charismatic in his own way. It's kind of like just about every villain Alan Rickman has played (I'm specifically thinking of his characters from Die Hard and Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves)-yes, they're undoubtedly bad guys, but because they have such personality, because Rickman plays them so well, you can't help but look forward to when they're on screen. It's the same thing with Lezard. Is he the kind of guy I'd want to meet in real life? Heck, no. But as a fictional character, he's fascinating. And yes, a lot of that fascination comes from the fact that he's so messed up, and thinks so differently from how a normal, moral person like you or me would.

As far as the LezardxLenneth shipping goes, well, shipping is a strange thing. I ship a lot of characters who otherwise wouldn't be good/healthy for each other, because for me it's about character interaction, not living happily ever after. Happily ever afters are great in real life, don't get me wrong, but I find them boring in fiction. I want conflict, I want tension, I want character dynamics; Lezard being an obsessive creep provides a lot more of that than if he was a knight in shining armor.

(As an aside, I think it's interesting you bring up the LucianxLenneth pairing. I actually wish that pairing was explored more in fanfic-because, yes, as you pointed out, that's not a healthy relationship, either. But because they're portrayed as the canon pairing (and "canon" means "boring" to a lot of people), and because Lucian doesn't have the in-game personality that Lezard has, you don't see a lot of it.)

As for the fans who GENUINELY think Lezard's TEH MOST ROMANTIC(!1!), well...that's a different matter altogether, and a lot of it can probably be chalked up to plain old superficiality: They made Lezard a lot more conventionally handsome in VP2; his voice got sexier (which is one of the things I really lament-much as I love Liam O'Brien as a voice actor, and as good a job I think he did with Lezard, I really think Maddie Blaustein's voice fit the character better). But yes, the same thing happens with villainous/evil characters in a ton of other fandoms. Take the Phantom from The Phantom of the Opera-a similarly obsessed, psychopathic murderer, but he has a slew of fangirls because he was played by Gerard Butler in the movie. Take Sephiroth from Final Fantasy 7-another mass-murdering psychopath with a god complex, but the fangirls are willing to forgive/overlook that because he wears leather and his hair's just so pretty. You yourself mentioned Draco Malfoy-again, played by a handsome Tom Felton in the movies. Suffice it to say, there's a long-standing tradition of associating "beautiful" with "good," and so people are more willing to make excuses for a beautiful/handsome villain than for an ugly one.

Another part of the phenomenon is that a lot of fans are girls who are young and inexperienced, and so often mistake lust and passion for love. I did the same thing when I was a teenager-I read romance novels and swooned over how passionate and exciting the heroes were, but look back now and go, "Wow, these guys were controlling d*cks." I mean, look at the Twilight phenomenon. It's a phase most girls grow out of (though not all, and yes, that's when I start wondering and worrying).

Anyway, I hope that answered some of your questions.

Again, LotornoMiko, I want to apologize for using your review space as a discussion forum. I do casually follow and casually enjoy this story (I'm just very, very bad at reviewing, hence why you've never heard from me before, OTL), but your reply to Dropping an anvil was, to be entirely frank, very bratty and not helpful at all. Perhaps he/she could have phrased it better, but he/she quite plainly brought up legitimate questions and concerns that you could have addressed, yet didn't, hence why I felt the urge to throw my hat into the ring. If you would prefer to keep discussion out of your reviews, I'll respect that and refrain from doing so in the future. (And before you say "grow a pair and sign in," no, I don't have an account here, either.)
Dropping an anvil chapter 19 . 11/21/2011
It seems that you have misinterpreted my review. I will admit that I was rude and harsh and had probably offended you in some way and I apologise for that if I gave the impression that I was ridiculing you for your choice in shippings, that was NOT my intention. The main issue for my review is just WHY you and so many other people just love Lezard? (I queried it both at the beginning and the end of my initial review) because he was frankly never meant to be a character to be loved to such an extent by the creators of Valkyrie Profile (much like Draco Malfoy). I’ve already listed my reasons for why I dislike Lezard, what I want to know is the reasons why so many people seem to like him.

To answer your reference to me on chapter 19, I never told, demanded, or deliberately implied that I wanted you to stop writing LezardxLenneth stories (if I did it unintentionally I apologise) nor did I assume that your story is “the perfect place for [[me]] to get on [[my]] soapbox and rant and rave like the lunatic [[I am]]”. Since you write 14 out of 20 of the LezardxLenneth stories here and have already admitted to have scores more you haven’t posted, you’re the easiest person for me to inquire this into so it is logical for me to ask here, again I will admit that my initial query was overly harsh and probably came off as being an attack on you and I again apologise for that.

So once again, more civilly this time, why do you, why does everyone, like Lezard and enjoy shipping him with Lenneth so much?

P.S. I don’t have an account or an email address (I have little use for electronic communication in my daily life) so there’s nothing for me to leave here.
A L P H A - H U N T R E S S chapter 17 . 11/20/2011
That was a really nice comparison that her body was a weapon yet untried. Of course it would be because Lenneth would normally never, of her own choice, ever choose to seduce as a method. She is honorable and obviously isn’t comfortable with her deceit.

Awwww, Lenneth’s thoughts were kind of cute. I wouldn’t call it true compassion because otherwise she might’ve stopped fighting with the wyvern but even I felt bad because even though its dangerous the monster is still a baby in mind.

Even though I know she was ‘running’ away from Lezard and the emotions they have to confront between them. I was happy to see Lenneth the Battle Maiden return. Not sure Lezard would be but then again he can provide her alternatives to pursue but Lenneth still has to be able to choose her own paths free of Lezard’s opinions and bias against the Valkyrie existence.

And with the birth of Lenneth the Berserker there is the return of Lezard the EVER WORRIER xD I know it isn’t funny but it reminded me of Lezard who is always concerned about Lenneth in OS VP. At least this Lenneth is still a goddess which is more than the mortal Lenneth can claim from OS VP.

Lenneth is SO in denial (about NOT being frightened) but not that I could blame her. If I had pride like hers on the line I wouldn’t admit anything like that to man especially one I didn’t explicitly trust YET.

THUS FAR in the fic you have made her getting closer to him VERY convincing without making Lezard get suspicious because she is giving in. Lenneth is by no means acting out of character but little by little she is yielding to Lezard (even in little agreements) and in a believable fashion that leaves nothing to be desired. We all know Freya would have her act like a sl*t from the get-go…and get it on a move on and over with but like Lezard isn’t Odin, Lenneth isn’t Freya.
A L P H A - H U N T R E S S chapter 16 . 11/20/2011
I LAUGHED at that ‘using fork to stab’ sentence. It cracked me up any would be suitor of the modern world would agree that a date (or anything like it) is a success if you aren’t stabbed during said date (or anything like it) xD No shouting is ALSO a plus, shouting and quarreling would be bad for digestion!

Amusing as heck that Lezard never-ceasing admiration of Lenneth nearly got him smacked in the face. Not because it would hurt him just amusing to imagine Lezard SO out of it over the mere sight of Lenneth.

It might be an unspoken insult but she scarcely knows Lezard to trust him to behave. The last time she woke up in the bedroom he’d put her to sleep and to use Lenneth’s words TOOK liberties. True she is playing the damn prude and it is understandable why he’d want/need something to tide him off. Lenneth sees that as a reason not to trust him or something I bet.

Poor Lezard he goes through so much to just GET TO Lenneth in this time and the very act of cross time to obtain her would displease her just like the very act of trying to bring Lenneth to a plane of existence he could share with her through use of homunculi (and what their creation entailed) displeased the Lenneth of the future. He always takes steps forward, towards her and they always seemed doomed to displease her. I wonder how discovery of the truth will later impact the story and how they (Lezard & Lenneth) will bypass it.

Lezard’s thoughts in the middle of this chapter started out somewhat bleak in thinking about the past and how it would never be acceptable to Lenneth. Like Lezard, I am hoping that changing his current behavior onward from this day hence will be enough to carry her to fall in love with him and overlook his sordid past. We all do things we aren’t proud of or can never change save in our future actions. That is the kind of hopeful vibe I get off Lezard and I am hoping it works out.

Truthfully the opinion of Silmeria being a user and manipulative was actually pretty foreign to me. In hindsight after recollecting VP2 it probably shouldn’t be. I guess I overlooked that unsavory aspect because of her fight against Odin and his wrongs committed against Midgard. True that she wasn’t using them in a villainous capacity but she did have a bit of a distance. Still Silmeria isn’t quite as bad as the Aesir who used or intended to humans and other (i.e. Brahms and the Dragon Orb) for their own aims or selfish gain. I just guess I overlooked Silmeria’s likeness with the Aesir because her aims were for the greater good of the mortals who served with her. By no means does it lower my opinion of Silmeria just was eye-opening point of view. Amusing how Lezard turned it against Silmeria and used her in turn – an irony of sorts.
A L P H A - H U N T R E S S chapter 15 . 11/20/2011
It is almost cute how nervous Lezard is in his eagerness to please her. Though sadly Lenneth won’t likely be impressed by culinary skill he is obviously glad it surprises her enough to get her to watch him intently in studious fashion.

Hmmmm since Lucian is with Lenneth in the PRESENT time era following Ragnarok it seems like you stuck with the Canon in that time period for now. I wonder if that is subject to change. Hopefully Lezard screwing things up in the past will correct the future of the time line.

I really wish Lucian lovers had to read this stuff because you are absolutely right. Lucian did nothing except act as a freaking accelerant on Ragnarok’s fire! Then they’d say he didn’t know well that’s because he a mopey moron! Come on!

I have seen that Lezard has actually matured in thinking about how he cannot stuff her into a homunculus. His point of view seems to have evolved in his understanding of how the divine perceive mortals. Nor would putting Lenneth in a homunculus be like Odin having put her to sleep because the goddess would have been aware. I think it shows improvement (even small) of his character even if it is stirred only by his love of Lenneth. Truthfully one might think after being upon the spiritual plane for so long and feeling imprisoned himself in his own flesh might have been another reason for his aversion to use homunculi. You do sense him growing because you see such a change in his thoughts on his past in Valkyrie Profile.

Ha ha, I laughed at the notion of Lenneth uncomfortably realizing that she was the feast he wanted to feast on instead of breakfast. Meanwhile not so funny is the notion of how maddening it is to rouse patience with Lenneth so close. Mind you it is obviously the most crucial that he have patience NOW at the most difficult of times because when Lenneth is before him and with him she’ll make her opinion and personal judgments of him. She has to make a good one if he wants anything lasting.

*Heavy sigh* Wow…they were having a half way decent conversation devoid of Odin and then Lezard seems to have JINXED himself because right after he said that Lenneth veered it right into Odin territory all over again. It isn’t annoying to me but Lezard must think it vexing to be like ‘here we go again’

Lezard has a point if he didn’t care a whit for what Lenneth thought of him he’d have used and abused her many times over. The fact he’d go to the trouble of trying to win her over is indicatory of an alternate agenda dependent upon her. Gods knows that Lezard would have had the strength and power to forcibly take her if he so chose.

The end of the chapter another great argument that you somehow twist into a stubborn and reluctant acquiescence. Again it is nevertheless a good one and promising in my opinion because it shows that Lezard COULD come to do good for others on Lenneth’s behalf. Maybe a bit sad it takes her to convince him to think about anybody but her but still he is in character and truthfully the other gods aren’t much better. The Valkyries are the closest to mortals and seem to be the only ones who care to any great degree.
A L P H A - H U N T R E S S chapter 14 . 11/19/2011
I like how you paint the portrait of how the Valkyries are accepted and honored yet ostracized and without place. Again it could be that maybe in causing an upheaval of Asgard’s pantheon and its traditions that maybe Lezard can make some ‘favorable’ changes. I remember how I ALWAYS hoped that Lezard could win Lenneth’s love and regard by becoming good on behalf of his Queen without totally sacrificing what makes him Lezard. Maybe I will get that EVENTUALLY happy ending I desired of Lezard’s Triumph here.

Oh good you explained it, first time I read this I was wondering why she was sleeping. Nevertheless it is an effectual way to fit in a ‘change of scene’ .

I believe Lezard has hit the nail on the head in understanding that Lenneth wants him to be WORTHY of her. Lezard might say he did that in overthrowing Odin but that hardly impressed Lenneth so now he has to win her regard in a way she’d find acceptable. Lenneth is probably so in denial because I think Lezard did understand her in that moment.

Interesting in declaring she has one reason, one purpose for existing she has opened the door for Lezard to challenge her in that and show her other reasons to exist. If she is ignorant as to other reasons to exist he’d endeavor to teach or expose her to other reasons.

Lezard’s argument is very sound and Silmeria is a good example. Not that Lenneth would blindly believe in Odin’s faults but the readers/audience all know how close Lezard is to the truth and who would know better than Lezard who knows Silmeria better than Lenneth does herself! The mage God certainly spent more time with Silmeria than the secondhand accounts Lenneth gets from others.

Wow, I am with Lenneth on this one, the notion of Lezard cooking came totally out of left field and hit me between the eyes. Truthfully I never expected him to eat anything but what he could eat WITHOUT cooking in the slightest like bread he could buy or steal or something. I suppose if he can make alchemical remedies and potions and complex spells he could easily follow a recipe to make something simple. Lezard is good with details no doubt.

Damn I just LOVE the arguments in this chapter. I shouldn’t be happy because they are fighting or disagreeing but their arguments are so good and they are BOTH right. I wish Lenneth could understand the truth of Lezard’s because what Odin gave them wasn’t much of a life. I wonder if Silmeria being freed could help him gain ground by…I don’t know…undermining her thoughts about Odin. Then again Silmeria might and likely will not want to help Lezard after what happened.

Lenneth...until you've had the chance to actually live experience the highs and lows of not discount what I offer you..." I LOVE that line. Lenneth herself has to acknowledge the truth of it which is why he rendered her nigh speechless (and it was spectacular too!) How can she judge without evidence!

You make me curious about the mistakes of Lezard’s love life. I am wondering if this is you giving this story a twist of your own plot or if you are eluding to something I should know and are too dumb to remember them.

Lezard’s declarations of faith and love at the end are spectacular. No doubt they are unnerving for Lenneth but they gave me pleasurable goose bumps because of the mere conviction. It also gave me the feeling one reputably feels when they find their ‘soul mate’ like they aren’t complete until they find the other half and Lezard has found it just has to keep that.

I love that challenge/burn from Lenneth – “That remains to be seen!” Very hurtful, very scathing but unfortunately very true because his greed is jeopardizing others, whether he wants to acknowledge it or not he is acting in a similar fashion to Odin in many ways too.

This chapter is ending out well. With all the arguing earlier I didn’t know how you were going to make Lenneth yield ground to Lezard in a convincing fashion without being suspicious or making her act unlike herself but you not only kept her in character but managed to turn their fight into a reluctant but acceptable agreement to TRY at the very least.

That was an interesting twist that the blood bond seemed to be somewhat ‘aware’ of her deception and disapproving of the betrayal in her. Interesting indeed, I wonder if you will capitalize and make it an actual magical part of the story or if its all in Lenneth’s head and she is imagining it because she is uneasy about her lying.
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