|Reviews for Harry Potter The New Marauders|
| THE CRITIC chapter 42 . 9/6/2013
the title shud have been- "lily potter ...a witch or goddess"
| Severus Snape chapter 29 . 9/5/2013
they are 12 year olds...u portray them like nymphomaniacs
| lavender brown chapter 24 . 9/4/2013
12 year olds are not that romantic ,u know
| Dolores Umbridge chapter 20 . 9/4/2013
why does every main character end up in ravenclaw?there are 4 houses...distribute evenly.
| albus severus chapter 18 . 9/4/2013
plz limit the amount of characters..
| Rubeus Hagrid chapter 15 . 9/4/2013
dude...the story is going way 2 fast...yeh gotta slow it a bit..
| sam weasely chapter 11 . 9/4/2013
| Emily Thorne chapter 10 . 9/4/2013
the chapters are nice but very dull...something thrilling would do the job
| Jk Rowling chapter 9 . 9/4/2013
plz limit the amount of characters...
| SHREWD WARLORD chapter 8 . 9/4/2013
THE STORYLINE IS VERY GOOD AND SO IS THE LAYOUT...HOWEVER IT WOULD HAVE BEEN MUCH BETTER IF THERE WERE SOME MORE EMPHASIS ON SCHOOL LIFE ,PRANKS,FUN...RAATHER THAN ONLY QUIDDITCH...IT LOOKS LIKE A LITTLE EXAGGERATED VERSION OF" THE PHILOSPHER'S STONE"...IN TOTAL THE STORY IS BRILLIANT
| Guest chapter 143 . 8/16/2013
Your stories are absolutely amazing! I loved HEA and TNM! Thank you so much for writing them!
| Tune4Toons chapter 1 . 7/23/2013
Hello! I'm here on behalf of Reviews Lounge Too as one of our members recommended your story to us. (Little tidbit, did you know your story is almost a third of the length of the longest ongoing story on the site? XD) Before I start, I would like to say yes, I did read through all the way up to when Lily read her letter from Al before I got a nice grasp on what to comment on the most, but I am big on first impressions, so I'm basing my comments here with a mix of overall.
Anyways, there's this fast paced feel to it- you just head straight into the set up, into the next scene, nice and quickly, but a couple of times, I was confused, I'll admit. Like from this chapter for example:
[Scorpius jumped slightly, and was again surprised – especially since Nick was telling his cousins something that he'd been thinking a lot about for most of the summer.]
Was Scorpius able to tell right away that Nick had been thinking about it a lot or what? The way it was here, it'd seem like he had heard Nick talk about it even though they hadn't met till now. It's just that lack of POV consistency in narration that can get confusing (the downside to third person omniscient).
I'm also not sure who the main protagonist here will be as you introduced a lot of characters in this chapter and we see the POV jump around (I know it's omniscient, but it'd be nice to get a clear idea who that one main character is). The imagery is rather limited as well due to the fast pace you have here (like is the building the same as before after the whole battle? Where there differences to Hogwarts compared to what their parents may have described to them? A lot of these little things can make a huge difference.) For the letters as well later on, I recommend Italics to differentiate them the rest of the narration.
I know you probably wouldn't like hearing concrit on the first chapter when you're over one million in, but first chapters leave big impressions, and the idea of continuing off from where HP ends is a great one, so I hope all this helps. Cheers!
| LORISCHROM chapter 143 . 7/23/2013
I absolutely loved this story and the one before it, Happily Ever After. I would recommend it to anyone who wanted to find out what happened during those "19 years later." I thought the author had some great ideas and it was truly a pleasure to read.
| CheckersChance2 chapter 1 . 6/3/2013
How the hell did you write (probably) the longest fanficiton EVER, and get less than a hundred reviews? O_O
| GarionRiva chapter 21 . 5/29/2013
Well I got really bored after 20 chapters. I miss the darkness and seriousness harry potter books had. I have no problem with your time of the story but give us more range and variety.
I like the first chapters but then romance afloat. I wanted to see more variation from your characters and more development outside all the kisses, hugs...