Reviews for Soliloquy
Bananafrak chapter 12 . 6/13/2011
This is such a deep story. All I can say is thanks for creating a sort of guide on how to help someone to deal with alcoholism and a fanfic rolled into one it will prove very useful someday and for many other readers too.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 12 . 2/5/2011
And now the last review I'll make for this story, well seeing as it's the last chapter. In contrast to the seriousness of just about all the other chapters, I found this one to be refreshingly light-hearted. Lyn punching Hector almost seemed playful to me. Sain's teasing was another humorous moment that I liked to see. And you ended it on a really sweet note with Kent and Lyn together. It's always hard to find a way to bring a story to an end, and I'd say you ended it well.

Great story. :D
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 11 . 2/5/2011
I found it somewhat humorous when Lyn handed Kent the bottle and let him take her back to her room. I could just visualize it, and it struck me as funny. I know the situation isn't, but even so I found the image funny. Even though I've read this story through once already, it's bittersweet to come close to the end, especially when it's a good story. I really like the scenes with Kent and Lyn, but I think this last one was one of the best ones. It's short, yes, but you still paint quite the picture, so much so that I would've liked to have seen it in-game.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 10 . 2/2/2011
I rather liked Lyn's bluntness in this chapter. It was certainly a question I never expected her to ask, and it was just, as you put it, a shock. I also liked her heart-to-heart with Kent. I once wrote a scene very much like it in my own FE fic, and I can tell you it's not an easy thing to write. So give yourself a pat on the back because I'd say you accomplished it perfectly. It's, as Billy Joel once said, sad and it's sweet. It was a great scene to read.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 9 . 1/24/2011
I'm probably going to miss out on those bonus points, so I'm not going to take that guess. XD

In all seriousness, this was yet another great chapter. Even though I'm fond of longer stories, it still impresses me that you can pack a lot into so little. It's a story with few words, but I still think you make your words count. It makes me feel sorry for Lyn, not that I haven't already, but the way you write it, I can just about feel the bottom she's about to hit. I really don't know what else I could say that wouldn't be repeating myself.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 8 . 1/22/2011
I enjoyed reading this chapter, well I've enjoyed the all. I like how you portray Kent in this, unsure of what to say or what he can do. The way you paint both him and Lyn is very good. Both of their struggles are heart-wrenching in their own way. I may have said that before, but it's still true. I also liked how Lyn's flash of reality came in. It seemed almost natural the way it happened, and I thought it was really well written. Great work as always.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 7 . 1/18/2011
I still have a lot of praise for this story. It's a fine read. But there were some things I wasn't sure about, and maybe it comes from not having played FE 7 in such a long time. For one, I thought Sain wasn't all that serious, but then again this is a serious situation. Like I said, it probably comes from not playing the game for a long time. I also can't comment on Farina's character because I don't remember ever seeing her when I did play. Also, in the second part, I got lost a bit on whose point of view it was. At first I was like, is this Kent and then I realized it was Sain's perspective. Although I think it's because I left part of my brain back in my bed when I read this, so it's no fault of yours.

I did like the little glimmer of hope you put in that second part though. With how serious it's been, I liked seeing that little bit, "Maybe they could bring her back." Sometimes the most simple sentence can speak volumes, and I really thought that did. And it's sad to watch Lyn do this, especially in front of Kent. You paint it all quite well, especially in so few words. Great job.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 6 . 1/15/2011
Not much I can say that's new. You'd think as a fellow writer, I could come up with some more creative praise. You paint a very clear picture of Lyn's slow decline and how it affects those around her, and you still choose your words well, so give yourself a pat on the back for that. Aside from the abrupt ending of the first and last sections, there's really nothing for me to critique.

I sometimes go on YouTube, so if you wouldn't mind telling me your user name there, I'd seeing your video if you posted one.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 5 . 1/14/2011
Very good. I know I probably sound like a broken record, but I'd say praise is due. Despite the length, which seems almost ideal for these past two chapters but I still would've liked to see more. Still, that's a minor thing. Lyn's struggle is very real. Even though I've never faced a struggle like hers, it feels very heart-wrenching to read, especially from Kent's perspective. The moment between those two was, I think, very well written. It was such a sweet moment between them. Excellent work on this story.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 4 . 1/12/2011
Once again I have little to say about this fic that doesn't amount to praise. Firstly, I enjoyed what you did with Kent. In the game, he seemed a bit overly-noble, and while I'm sure some people can be that way, I like seeing a bit more dimention. Seeing him almost snap and saying he'd like to shake this out of Lyn adds that dimention to him. It also makes his fear for her seem more real. Lyn's section was small, yes, but I would say you said what needed to be said. And then the last part where Kent finds her in her mother's room, I thought you wrote it very well. You captured his feelings well. And while this isn't a romance story, I thought there was a subtle infusion of it when Kent found he couldn't be angry with her. I'd say it's easy to write a love story, but not so easy to capture that the way you did where it's not at the forefront, but still there, even if you didn't intend that.

I'm rambling now, so I'll simply add that even though I think your chapters could have used some expanding on, this one I thought was just right. I'd say it was a balanced chapter: not lacking anything and not going on and on either. Well done.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 3 . 1/10/2011
Once again, your work is great. Though the chapter was short, I think it was a fine length for this one. Though I write longer chapters, I do enjoy an author who can say what needs to be said and move on. Lyn's decline is certainly detectable and I find it amazing that you can cause us to feel for her in so few words. It's hard to find anything to critique, but I suppose my one thing would be that I didn't see too much of the avoidance on the part of the knights. What I mean is you write about Lyn avoiding them, and I wouldn't have minded seeing their reaction to seeing her often and then not seeing her at all. But still, you've done very well and far be it from me to tell you how to write your own fic.
Sardonic Kender Smile chapter 12 . 1/8/2011
It is late, and my brain is dead, but I have to review. I think you pulled off breaking it into smaller chapters to show the passage of time...because you posted them all bit by bit, I was literally following this story over the course of weeks. (And, you know, I'm the world's slowest reviewer.) But it was like a serial-because time was passing in my life, it felt like time was passing in Lyn's also.

I really liked the bittersweet goodbye. I'm sure Lyn will miss everything, but if she has *KENT* she doesn't need anything else!

["I am terrible with goodbyes," he said, and he could not help the soft quiver that invaded his voice.] THIS. THIS WAS SO SAD THOUGH. I can definitely see Sain being bad with goodbyes. I always saw him as more of a "see you later" kind of guy.

I wished for a happy ending to this one. It could really easily have swung the other way, to make a point...and although those are great, and you're capable of doing that well, I'm glad that this ending was happy.

Good job, Mannadon!

TheFreelancerSeal chapter 2 . 1/8/2011
I must say you write well. Like I said, I've enjoyed this story, keeping my eye out for every new update. It's still sad to see Lyn doing this, and I figured it was a matter of time before someone found out, and at least it was two friends. And I liked Kent's inner struggle I guess you could call it, with him defending her even though he knows the truth. I think it really fits his character. My one complaint with this chapter is that it seemed to go too fast, and by that I mean there was no build-up to their discovery. Maybe it's because my own work tends to be longer, but I think this element could have done with a little more building. But that's probably just me. Your work is still great.
TheFreelancerSeal chapter 1 . 1/6/2011
I've been lurking about keeping an eye on this one, and now I've finally gotten around to leaving a review. I must say I enjoy your work, and I've read quite a few of your Kent/Lyn stories. I've enjoyed every one I've read, and this one is no exception. Though I've read the whole thing, I plan to leave reviews for each chapter.

This is an excellent start. The picture you paint of Lyn is quite in character I have to say. The way you present the things she has to deal with makes it seem like anyone would succumb to this sort of thing. And even as a starting chapter, you already make me feel sad for her not only having to deal with the affairs Caelin, but being as alone as she is. Well done in this chapter, and your story for that matter.
Harukame chapter 12 . 1/6/2011
Wonderful, I loved every moment of reading this.

And the power of addiction (though specifically alcohol) is terribly strong. After having it once it's strange to not have it again.

I regret that this review is not much, but I just wanted to say I'm glad to have read it.
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