Reviews for The Adventures of Mary Sue
Trainer Ed chapter 26 . 10/2/2017
Thank you for the guide. Really, thanks!

I'm a bit newer to fanfiction, and thus have a small problem relating to Mary Sues and whatnot. I'll try to adjust some of my characthers (I can never spell that right) in order to prevent them from becoming so.

... And not to mention my own OC is one himself. Geez!

Once again, thank you for this fanfiction/guide. I don't know how I didn't read this earlier!

-Trainer Ed
IAmUmbreon chapter 11 . 1/22/2017
Couple of other noteworthy pokemon that hardly ever appear:
Jirachi (one of the LEAST used legends)
Flareon (the LEAST used eeveelution)
Most other fish

Bye for now.
IAmUmbreon chapter 7 . 1/22/2017
Alright. I'm going to use my new OC:
Name: Airbrush Sares (Brush for short)
Gender: Male
Age: 10
Hair: Color: Purple obsidian (purple, almost black) short and spiky
Eyes: green, normal shape
Clothing: um, what Gold wears, only blue
Personality: Reserved, quiet, sort of cold but not to his pokemon, doesn't really hold grudges, clumsy
History: Abusive father, dead mother, e.t.c. I can't come up with anything
Pokemon: Litleo, Shuppet, Magby, Snivy (Litleo is starter, Shuppet he caught normally, ditto for Magby, Snivy he found wounded)
Goals: To be the best, and prove his father wrong.
Oak chapter 26 . 9/16/2016
Uhh this is just my OC (Not Pokemon) So Oak is a princess of a elven kingdom. She has a little brother Sparrow a dad named Bear and a mother named Rose (Its a custom to name elves after emotions, gems, plants, animals) when she was 7 her parents went to war with the merpeople and they sadly died. At first she was mostly shocked, then she started crying, she eventually became depressed. A therapist helped her by getting her in to music and books and just talking to her. What ultimately helped her though was her brother. So now she is 14 completely recovered and playing in the Fields Beyond when she was shot by a dart. She is taken to a simulation area called The Dome where she meets super powered teens Amy, Elliot, Simon, Jasper, Kitsune(Amika), and Todd. She appears confident because of her royal upbringing but is naturally very shy. She is down to earth and sweet and loves to sing. I wouldn't say fiercely but she is very loyal and she hates violence after her parents died in the war. Its hard to describe her flaws but she is clingy and and not very optimistic she is also HORRIBLE at archery depute it being her kingdoms chosen weapon. She is also delicate in the way that she would just crumble if someone betrayed her. Your rating?
TheSecretWriter chapter 17 . 3/28/2016
Overused: Eevee, Mew, Dratini etc.
Underused: Natu, Jynx, Slowpoke, Girafarig, Noctowl, Potato (currently writing a chapter and a boy calls a potato his Pokemon and he actually gets somewhere [ex: Neighbor's yard])
Guest chapter 11 . 2/15/2016
I have my Oc starting with a riolu. I needed something connected to aura for the plot so it was the only thing that came to mind. The setting is Johto. The riolu is stolen from scientists studying aura and she later gets caught and the riolu is taken back. The story is basically her journey with riolu before he is taken away from her. After, she is held back from starting her actual journey due to the incident. The ending is her visiting riolu with her new chikorita and thanking him for the memories.
I'm not sure how good this story is or what I should change. Any advice?
GoTheDist chapter 2 . 7/11/2015
I have to admit, I'm laughing pretty hard about this. The stupidity level is there. I think I'll finish this and it'll help me with my future writing. Thanks!
Eclipseon94 chapter 7 . 5/19/2015
Just food for thought, but to me sending ten-year-olds off on their little lonesome to jaunt across the countryside with inevitable criminal activity means that the Pokemon universe has some of the worst parents in history. Bumping up the trainer licensing age to teenage years honestly seems like a wise idea, not only because they'll have more time to learn survival skills and get better at critical thinking, but also in terms of general maturity.
jonaskeller10 chapter 26 . 3/15/2015
I absolutely adore this! It's witty and clever, and the only thing I haven't liked so far is the idea of critiquing other people's characters without permission. Other than that, fantastic! I feel like Cubone is an underused Pokémon but I'm not sure if it would be okay to give it to my character as a starter, simply because I'm not sure of the level of Cubone fic-ness. I have good reason for no one getting original starters for my WIP, though, so it's not that I'm worried about that. I just think he's either overused and I'm not seeing it or he's underused and I'm just being paranoid.
DeltaMLP chapter 26 . 2/20/2015
One of my big pet peeves with pokemon fics is when pokemon are treated just as intelligent as humans, but then they can only learn 4 moves like in the games. There is no justification as to why intelligent pokemon should have a limited number of moves, especially when moves like tackle, bite, and scratch are things.
DeltaMLP chapter 13 . 2/20/2015
Yes a ten year old could have a crush, but it isn't always very likely and it won't lead into anything deep for at least a few years. Why bother writing a time skip or something similar in your story when you could just make them the right age to start with?
DeltaMLP chapter 10 . 2/20/2015
Damn it, I want to read the rest of good exhibit A now...
DeltaMLP chapter 7 . 2/20/2015
I think that making the age limit for getting a pokemon license higher is fine in some cases. Honestly all parents in the pokemon universe kind of suck. They let their ten year olds go off on their own through the wilderness untrained on survival, and with only a weak, mildly intelligent animal as their companion. It's fine if they raise it to 12 to 14 just for realism and so they can justify the start of a relationship or feelings towards someone.
DeltaMLP chapter 6 . 2/20/2015
I like the idea of eevee as a character but almost all the examples that I see are badly written. I'm sure there's more than one good example, but the only good ones that I can think of right now is Sylvia The Sylveon and Silver.
DeltaMLP chapter 1 . 2/20/2015
This is amazing so far, Mary Sue is such a great protagonist, I can't wait to see her character development ( though she already is pretty dang great, character-wise) throughout the story! :)
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