|Reviews for Dominion|
| anon chapter 19 . 3/4
Love this story, can't wait for an update!
| fan1 chapter 5 . 1/3
pleas update! i really miss you a lot! i know that you would nail this the next chapter one way or another though.
| T Alana M chapter 8 . 1/2
Poor Mai. But I never really liked her anyway. You did a great job on this! :D
| JustOneMorePerson chapter 18 . 12/31/2013
Just read this story for the fifth time, I can't help it! The characters, the writing, the plot; everything is perfect. This is by far the most awesome Avatar story I've ever read and utterly the best one.
I'm dying to read the next chapter... Please, update :(
PS: Happy New Year! Wish you the best!
| PSG1JOHN chapter 19 . 12/31/2013
I hope you update this story... This is the best Azula Story I have seen so far and very sad but grabs you and keeps you in your set until the last chapter is finished!
| Clo chapter 19 . 12/30/2013
Update, maybe? :(
| malfunctionjunction chapter 19 . 10/26/2013
Each chapter is a doozy. I tried reading this chapter about twice; second time was more of a skimming. But it was on my bucket list to finish and review. This chapter is included in its doozy, but the opening is quite a breather. Personally, I enjoy reading stories of the most non-maternal characters in a series. Azula is one of those characters, and despite her unwanted pregnancy (the actions leading to it) it's relieving to an extent to see how she interacts with the spirit of her unborn daughter. And even Roku shows some promise of showing affection for the child, but I'm not sure if it's affection or pity for the child's existence. Yes, the baby's creation may be an "abomination" but the child herself is not. Azula is defiant on proving them wrong-that her daughter will rise above and will be whole, and her concern for the child's health once she's born...tear-jerking/heartwarming moment.
About Roku, I don't dislike him. I do think he's trying to lead his descendants on the right path, but when you don't know them personally things can get a bit messy. And only giving blame to one party; to his credit, he does reprimand Zuko as well when given the chance. I'm sure Azula made a mistake at the end, and I'm curious what consequences she'll have to suffer for it. From your author's note, she'll be suffering a lot more from her other actions as well. And I really do enjoy reading your author's notes; they give us a fun insight on your writing process and other tidbits we may not have noticed.
Appa lives. He's still alive so I can go with that, and despite Momo being an animal and comic-relief, I was mildly surprised to see that you killed him. The only thing I can think of as to why is to show that it 'might' be a world where anyone can die. Zuko did die but was brought back, but if that didn't happen, he would have stayed dead. The political aspect is something that I truly appreciate in this story; I don't know if I've said this already. You've given detail and obvious understanding of what you intend to do with the political setting as well as the spiritual setting in the story; they're not background aspects of the plot. Like in-universe, they play major roles and have their conflicting moments.
Katara using bloodbending to save a friend's life, that too I can see happening. It's heartbreaking and moving at the same time. And my quotes from this section are:
"You're an airbender," she pressed Aang, "make him breathe." and "You're a bloodbender. Make it beat!" For me to read it in Mai's voice was more or less, but it was much more pressing with the emotion tied in. You have to feel bad for Mai in this; trying her best to secure the throne for her son and seeing it, first hand, literally go up in flames. No pun intended.
Time to put my literary analysis skills to work; hope my modern fiction professor will be proud. I'm extremely interested in Zuko's part of the chapter during his time spent in the Spirit World. It contrasts Azula's in many forms, based on their inner turmoil and other elements I cannot define. Azula, at the beginning, is dressed in what she remembered as the best period of her life; as a princess, as a warrior, esteemed in the eyes of her nation and her father. In that form she is as so, and Zuko is the opposite. I see him only in his Fire Lord outfit, but I don't want to move away from Azula. In relations to their unborn child, I find it amazing at how they respond to (she? he?) because darn it-Azula might not want it but her actions towards the child is damn well receptive. Where Zuko, while he does embrace the dragon?baby and shows affection, only sees it as a 'beautiful monster'. Azula sees the child as a freaking child and doesn't even mention (whether she sees it as a monster as herself-I feel on the inside she does want to do better to this child than Ursa has done with her). A concern is that the child will grow healthy and whole, and I don't think it's for the reasons of bending and fighting.
And that says a lot.
Zuko is mystified and horrified by the dragon because that's what he perceives it to be. The child is an innocent, but it's manner of creation is corrupted. And Zuko recognizes it as an abomination, as inhuman. And that's depressing but you've written it in a beautiful way. "Beautiful Monster."
Azula (of all people) humanizes her bastard child, and Zuko dehumanizes his child-seeing it as a monster that kills the mother. Like wow.
There's more I want to go into with this since during Azula's time I visioned tons of snow-winter, which can mean death or purity. And Zuko is brought back to the time with Ursa (and there are tons I want to go into with that moment specifically Ursa) which is innocent but a false innocence-since what occurs is the Azula and Ozai moment-holy crap. But is this an effect of Azula's presence in the spirit world as well? How she perceives Ursa to be and almost accepting of Ozai's behavior-as a necessary evil to make her great? Oh gosh, all this speculation is making my head hurt.
Momo is still dead. Han is...I'm not going to say evil but politically minded, and I do think he has a point in admitting that Zuko is a good man but not a good Fire Lord-not as of right now, his emotions are clouding his better judgment. And I'm still trying figure out his love for his sister. It's platonic love-but it's twisted; I can't say if he's attracted to her, but attracted to what having her as a sister would mean to him. He loves Mai in the way a man should love his wife. But ah, poor Lu Ten. But the North! Curiouser and curiouser.
I don't think Azula is interested in the throne right now. Azula is interested in finding her mother and resolving her issues. Azula is finding herself, and for a moment, I thought she lost her baby. And I nearly cried. "Baby? Baby!?" I smiled and grew teary eyed. It's sweet; I love how you can incorporate heartwarming moments like this even though everything is going straight to hell right now. Will Tam and Mai's other spies reach Azula? I hope not, but I think they will.
Oh gosh, Azula is riding Fang to get to Ursa. I don't think Ursa is in the Spirit World as Fang is actually leading her to where she is in the physical world. Full moon rising-blood moon earlier. Yes, yes, this is all good, and there is so much more I want to get into but don't have the time right now. This was a spectacular chapter, and I love the parallels in the Spirit World with Azula and Zuko and how Roku received them.
Next chapter will be Fire Nation/Earth Kingdom issues? Oh snap. Giving us a writing soundtrack is no problem; I do it all the time myself. See you next time, and I enjoyed it too much!
| Q chapter 19 . 10/17/2013
You should update you know.. I really want to read the next chapter..
| Asdfg chapter 19 . 10/17/2013
I love the idea that Azula is having a daughter, but I did not like the fact that everyone thinks the baby is an abomination or the "start" of a new hate cycle. I think the baby has a great future..
Also I'm loving that Azula is developing feelings for her child.. It's beautiful.
| JustOneMorePerson chapter 19 . 10/15/2013
I fell in love with this story! Is so beautiful, well written and full of emotions! I actually read the 19 chapters in a day..
And I must say I'm eager to read the next one!
Also I love the fact that Azula is having a girl. But I just got a question, how far her pregnancy is?
Can't wait for the next chapter! Please update soon :)
| Guest chapter 19 . 10/3/2013
I love Azula having a daughter. I wish you killed Zuko; he's such a pain in the ass sometimes. Great chapter. Can't wait to see what's next!
| lemon-rind chapter 19 . 9/29/2013
Woah. There was oh so much going on in this chapter, and I don't know where to start. The spirit world seems to be fully thought out, so all of the difficulties you encountered, were more than taken care of in my eyes. Also, I didn't think you'd managed to bring Zuko back in such a golden way, but you did. Everything I could have hoped for. I could probably rant and rave about each section, but seeing as it's getting on 2 AM, I shall just leave it at the most sincerest of thanks, and go to bed dreaming of dragons.
| Vahnati chapter 19 . 9/27/2013
You brought him back to life! Of course you did xD damn that Avatar state anyhow. Well, the spirit world journey was interesting anyways, I'm glad you chose to do it the way you did. Azula's own journey was fun to read, and it was touching to see her starting to grasp the feeling of what it would be to be a mother. I can't wait to read the next chapter, though something is bugging me. Where is Iroh in all this? Did he take off or something before it all started? I must not remember that one happening.
| Meneldur chapter 19 . 9/27/2013
So, a very quick update; it has taken me time to reach here, but the holiday is finally over (and this is my last day of vacation, besides tomorrow, which is the Sabbath). You might have to start doing without me, though; I'm SUPPOSED to begin Officer's Training on the 10th, which means no internet (or time for it) communication except on weekends (which are shortened due to the Sabbath when I cannot access it), and even then, not on every weekend. If it happens, we'll see how we handle it. Given that you usually send me the first half of chapters, I should be able to get them back to you in time, especially if I give them priority over other e-mails, which shouldn't be hard... Eh, we'll cross it when we get there, I may not even get to go, or fail out due to physical issues in the first few weeks.
Looking back at the first scene in Zuko's Spirit World, it's uncanny how it combines so many things in such a seamless web that one doesn't question: Ozai was Fire Lord only after Ursa was gone, and Azula only bent blue fire after Ursa was gone, and yet that form Azula's preforming is the last one she preformed before Ursa went, in which she indeed upstaged her brother, in front of Azulon no less. Once you realize that, it forces a stronger sense of disconnect on the whole family - because it makes you realize Ursa is completely disconnected from Ozai and Azula, and this reality reinforces that. What's worse, Zuko waking up in her lap seems to imply he too was disconnecting himself from that reality, going off into a fantasy where they weren't part of the happy family. He realizes it, but only now does he realize how truly bad the family situation was, due to Ozai AND Ursa. Ursa's disappearance at the moment Zuko entreats her to prove this wrong only further drives home the point.
It's really sad that Zuko is so unaware of what his decisions mean that it takes his death and a journey to the spirit world affected by his unconscious for him to realize what his actions meant, what he was really feeling, how guilty he is, and how Azula is justified in wanting nothing to do with him. What makes it into a perfect tragedy is that we know that despite this, despite Roku reprimanding him, he's not going to stop.
The moment Zuko realized he's dead and is racing against time, not against Ozai, was very powerful upon reread.
The hallway memory scene was much clearer. Maybe it's just that I'm not tired, but it was clear the across the hall referred to the hall Zuko was currently in, and either you added lines or I missed them last time, because it was suddenly clear these memories were disappearing because he was dying.
When Azula made the childbirth noise, that was also well done. I already understood in the preview it was what Zuko remembered from Lu Ten's birth, but only now did I realize that he didn't, because his memories are gone.
"Everything that happened in the Spirit World held some significance, didn't it?"
I suddenly made a snap connection. i am convinced that this vision is what leads to what will happen in Ba Sing Se. Because Zuko will give it all the significance he can. And while he may be right about the danger Azula is in, he's wrong about pursuing her in such a way. But given the possibility of losing her again, I know this is what he'd do - chase after her to save her and their child, even if it just a beautiful monster. And knowing Zuko, he'd convince himself that Ozai's earlier statement about having made Azula was partly true, and so even if the child was an abomination, if only Zuko raises it properly, it could be good.
And Zutara shipping right off the bat, with Katara equating her pain with Mai's. You're good with this, aren't you?
Nice work on the resurrection, I liked Katara's realization she needed to help as well. Of course, it's only more Zutara shipping, and I find it highly amusing. Of course, you only let it go further, with Katara immediately thinking the worse of Mai, ready to fight her, just because she fought for Azula. Once they're out of there and safer, this'll only get better and better.
I like Han so far, he seems to be very rational and reasonable. He was even willing to let Zuko live despite the danger that would pose for a coup, if it meant Mai was helping him as part of a Regency for Lu Ten. There's a guy who knows to make the best offer he can for what he wants, and yet also knows how to get along without it. At least the Fire Nation will be in good hands during the interregnum. He really plays it off well, explaining logically why Zuko isn't a good ruler, why Azula would be a better one, and again, tempting them once more into a deal by implying Azula would be responsible for Lu Ten, and it's Mai's fault for not accepting the offer.
So, it's a ll gone to shit. Zuko and Mai are fugitives. Worst still, Hand and the traitors have Lu Ten, which gives them legitimacy. Zuko and Mai's escape with Aang makes the claim they're traitors and so forth more plausible. Simultaneously, they can't brazenly attack the traitors, because they could then threaten to kill Lu Ten - they'd have to infiltrate the palace first and assure Lu Ten's safety. Going to the North Pole only puts Zuko in a worst position - again, it's easy to believe claims of treachery, since he's going off to the place where the Fire Nation had its worst defeat in the war - and hey, wasn't Zuko there, and supposed to have worked against Zhao? Maybe he was a traitor all along, and he helped the Water Tribe defeat the Fire Nation Fleet, so they owe him a favor! Of course, the relative isolation of the North Pole won't help, making them lose even more control of the situation, not even being properly updated - if they were at Omashu, Mai's agents could still get to her, but I doubt she has agents or means of communication at the North Pole. Zuko and Mai have utterly lost this round.
And yes, there seems to be some serious damage, and Katara can't heal it. So, I guess that's what she'll be learning when they reach the North Pole, given that she wouldn't be much use in a war/policy meeting. Time will tell if the damage is permanent, as I suggested, or can be healed with Spirit Water and more skilled healers.
Oh, you will not stop with the Zutara shipping, with the hatred of Mai and 'Zuko needs you more'! They've barely escaped, and this is already high-quality entertainment! And wow, given the descriptions you used, I might think Katara hates Mai more than Azula.
Zuko tries to mitigate it, but Katara isn't buying it. This will be so much fun, even more than it was before! Meanwhile, Mai's movements were actually very justified. All the time, she was telling him to stop thinking of Azula, to do what must be done, to get a grip on his kingdom. Now they've lost their son and their power, and what is Zuko crying over? Azula. Who is the cause of all this, who as far as Mai knows, is going to usurp her place as mother to Lu Ten. When every sentiment Zuko expresses is one he should be expressing about Lu Ten. This, I think, is the point where their relationship as parents is irreparably harmed. (Also, I don't like to think of this, but I'm worried of the psychological effects of this on Mai, especially in regards to Azula and Lu Ten - I NEED that final confrontation we spoke of between Azula and Mai, because if not, I'm very worried about Azula's kid in Mai's hands, given the imaginary threat Mai imagined of Lu Ten in Azula's hands...)
"or the sun sunk any closer to the horizon since she arrived" - I think it should be 'nor'.
Huh. Fang seems a lot better at communication than Roku, even without speaking. Interesting, how he touched her womb, heart and brain...
What was that first memory? It was utterly weird. How was it meant to answer Azula's question? It seemed to be some fusion of past (and possibly future) memories of affection?
I loved Azula's thoughts on dragons and flying, as well as Sozin being a fool. I have yet more hopes for what will happen after Dominion, especially given your read of Measure Each Step, and ideas you might have picked up from there... it was a moment of simple beauty, amidst all the pain, and just Azula in he perfection, feeling her element as it is.
So, Fang is taking Azula to where Ursa is in the Spirit World. Her quest is almost at an end; her journey is only beginning. The question is, how immediate is the threat of Mai's assassins. Tam, her agent, is still in the Fire Nation; we don't know if he survived the coup or managed to get out. If he didn't, we don't know how soon he'll be able to return to Omashu. If so, it depends on how independent are his people - whether they'd attack without waiting for further instructions or no. I can currently see it happening one of two ways - either at the temple, which convinces Ursa to come with Azula, or after they leave, trying to prevent them from leaving Omashu's region and influence (since they go immediately north). In any case, it will present more of a challenge to Azula with Ursa to protect, but it may make her story that much more convincing to the nuns - not that I'm sure that is at all something important.
In any case, I can't wait for more (and hopefully soon, before I am bogged down in the training, though don't rush yourself on my account). I hope you have a good weekend, and that we can conitnue our discussions soon. Until then, all best wishes, Meneldur.
| Ecomadness chapter 19 . 9/26/2013
Damn this is an awesome chap I loved it so much can't wait for more epicness keep up the good work.