|Reviews for Asterion's Heaven|
| Kradeiz chapter 14 . 1/6
Well, you didn't disappoint, it was a satisfying conclusion. While part of me wishes I could've seen the team reincarnated and meeting up again, this is probably the best place to end it, on a sad but sweet note.
I'm glad the rest of the team found out what Ginyu went through for them, and not surprised that Recoome was the most touched, his promotion to second was appropriate if short-lived. Jeice's break down was funny and at first surprising, but after thinking about it I realized that he probably would be the one most likely to come to tears. Also sweet.
The Reincarnation Warehouse was also a neat idea, as are your ideas about the afterlife period, that some souls are good or bad enough to get sent to Heaven or Hell, and the rest get reincarnated until they wind up in one or the other. If nothing else, it makes King Yemma's job a lot easier.
All in all, it was a charming little story that gave me what I would've loved to see from the show: a follow-up and proper send-off for the Ginyu Force. Thank you.
| Kradeiz chapter 12 . 1/5
Um, wow, that was quite a cliffhanger, the whole team back together and determined to do things right this time, only for them to be torn apart again and disappear. You've really got me curious how you end it in the next two chapters.
Ginyu's backstory (and a bit of the others, too) was a good read. I know Cooler's one soldier, Sauza, had been a rival of Ginyu, but having him be the rich boy Ginyu first switched bodies with was a nice twist (as well as the cruel irony that the Sauza body wound up looking rather handsome). Having Ginyu found the Ginyu Force after his love of a comic book hero, and only realizing long after the fact that his hero had been propaganda for a genocidal tyrant, was fitting, tragic and made it believable that Ginyu would come to reflect and regret his past actions and try to reform.
Burter's backstory was probably the most tragic though, joining the Ginyus with the intent of becoming stronger and avenging his people, but ultimately becoming the very thing he hated.
The cultural references were fun, too; my favourites being the abominable snow cone man, and the old Ninja Turtles joke, "Well, this is 'like' meditating.", was not only funny but fits with the Ginyus really well. I'm quite looking forward to the conclusion.
| Kradeiz chapter 11 . 1/5
An interesting idea for a spot in Hell: a place that forms monsters out of the fear and evil of whoever enters there.
Guldo's story was amusing, starting with your typical hideous, skulking monster and ending with its 'dark purpose' being a mild inconvenience.
I also liked the peek into Ginyu's mind and his fear of not accomplishing their task. Pointing out the team's dark past but also addressing how their punishments in Hell had humbled them a bit, too. And they did manage to avoid trying to kill Goku, other than Burter, of course, but he was a different case with his time in the Gripless weighing down on him.
| Kradeiz chapter 10 . 1/5
If you listen closely, you can hear the space duck quacking...what a majestic creature.
This resolution was a touch corny, but it's the Ginyus, corniness comes with the territory. Jeice trying to bewilder/annoy Burter into speech was kinda endearing, as was the flashback to how the Purple Spiral came to be, and, of course, that inspiring them to take flight again. It's corny, but satisfying.
| Kradeiz chapter 9 . 1/5
Seems like Burter got the worst deal out of all of them when it came to real estate in Hell; he certainly has some issues to work out. His problems with Jeice are certainly legitimate (I liked his "I died like a punk!"), being left for dead by your best friend, and his digs at Recoome, while cruel, were a bit illuminating for both characters.
Speaking of the ginger, I'm coming to like him more and more as you depict him, between the unwavering loyalty to Ginyu (despite some bitterness over Jeice being chosen as second) and that he was smart enough to know Burter's power would be diminished after getting his body back so recently.
It introduces a bit of conflict, which is good because, as Ginyu pointed out, how are they supposed to prove they're reformed if there's no one for them to interact with to tempt them into villainy?
| Kradeiz chapter 8 . 1/5
The rain dance was nice even if it didn't work, and the attempts to capture Burter were fun. I'm guessing he's angry at Jeice for leaving him after Goku beat him, although he didn't seem to have a problem with that when they arrived on King Kai's planet in canon. Mind you, this is an AU, so that little detour might not have happened here.
| Kradeiz chapter 7 . 12/29/2015
Nice to have Jeice back, and the tidbits on some of Planet Brench's culture and history was fun.
I like how you've had each member of the team remember their pasts, each one not quite the same. Recoome simply needed a few sharp reminders, Guldo needed a few hours being immersed in the familiar comradery of his team, and Jeice's seem to be eluding him other than a gut feeling that he belongs with this lot. It makes each's experience more memorable and unique instead of just checking off the plot points of each person remembering.
And it's a little thing, but I loved Ginyu's flashback to the greenhouse and all the different numbers he added to his amphibious "teammates" (Jr., the Second, Mark II and the Sequel, that last one's my favourite).
| Kradeiz chapter 5 . 12/27/2015
I like your take on Recoome. He was pretty much just the typical big, dumb behemoth in canon, so it's nice to get a little more depth and intellect from him without being out of character.
Guldo was always my least favourite of the Ginyus but then he was also the one we saw the least of since he was killed off first. Regardless, he seems alright here; he's a surprisingly nice balance of self-serving and team player.
And Ginyu's realization and reaction to what the rock spires were was amusing, as was the DBZA Zarbon reference.
| Kradeiz chapter 2 . 12/16/2015
For me, one of the worst missed opportunities in DBZ was that nothing was done with the Ginyu Force after Namek. So finding a fic that gives them a chance at redemption and reincarnation is a nice find.
And so far, so good. The seven year window between the Cell and Buu sagas was a wise choice as it gives you a lot of leeway to plot the story. And given how competitive the Kais are, a bet over whether an evil soul can change is certainly plausible. In fact, pretty much everyone's in character, from Goku and his inability to think before he speaks, to Ginyu's blunt, opportunistic nature. I also like how you expanded on the goings-on in Hell and the interactions between souls, making Ginyu's experience there seem all the more desolate and lonely.
If I have one criticism at this point, it's that the narrative could be a bit more fleshed out. Most seems to be just dialogue at this point, almost to the point of talking heads. I give it a pass now though because you're establishing everything, and unless you wanted to simply expand on what you've already said, there wouldn't be much more to say.
| MaidenOfTheLostMasks chapter 14 . 7/1/2015
Oh my god, I-I'm really trying not to bawl my eyes out, this was beautiful and amazing and so many other fantastic words that I just can't bring up. This is something I won't forget, Thank you for writing this.
| ArmCannos44 chapter 14 . 10/13/2014
can you make a squle were becease of there recainasoin they have ormal powers but some times they are able to unlock they power for a bit.
| Tepheris chapter 14 . 3/5/2014
Delightful series. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Call me an uncultured Philistine, but I'd take this over Dante's Inferno any day.
| Tepheris chapter 10 . 3/5/2014
Wow, I'm very impressed so far with this story. The character development is wonderful, and wow, you even gave an explanation WHY the Ginyu Force makes their ridiculous poses, which actually manages to make it seem somewhat dignified in my eyes. I like the idea of Ginyu being a Brench before the body switch.
So many TFS references going on in these chapters, so much fun.
| Tepheris chapter 1 . 3/5/2014
You managed to portray King Kai the best I've read in fanfiction. Consider me intrigued enough to go through your story.
| Major144 chapter 14 . 11/26/2013
Great story! It was full of action, drama, and humor! The Ginyu Force was really in character. I like the orgin stories that each member had. I liked how the Ginyus turned from villains to heroes. I enjoyed seeing how the Ginyus cared for one another. A great story with a good ending!