|Reviews for Raven's Fall|
| 534667lc chapter 12 . 7/31
Loved your story , now favourited!
| Onokiyo chapter 12 . 6/22
"Forgive me Sasuke..." "Again, next time."
Squeel! So does this mean Itachi is going to meet Sasuke again in the future in some way or is this hope speaking?
Having Hikari come was great fun! Poor Tsunade, having to deal with a village, a certain trouble-magnet blonde and his trouble-magnet kid and a mooching grandma. Lol. Between each of them they're certainly not making the Hokage's job any easier.
The way you write is...emotional. Your stories reverberate emotions out of the readers. Itachi and Naruto calling out Sasuke out of his darkness..this part really deserves to be in the main story. It's sad that the old Sasuke will never exist again unless as temporary appearances but he's finally chose to move on, away from the darkness and into the light.
| Onokiyo chapter 11 . 6/22
The last chapter was very disturbing. Child Sasuke getting molested always makes me uncomfortable. It's not cool making this a common occurrence with your stories. I got molested when I was 7 and reading about a 5 year old getting molested by people older than them isn't much better. I lost it when the girl placed her hands under his pants.
I know you wanted to portray that being adult is not always fun but being a kid is not always fun as well. I know I was targeted because I was a kid and didn't know how to defend myself. Sorry, I am saying too much now, but scenes like these are really upsetting to me. So writing scenes like those just to add drama to a story is just kind of ...callous unless the emotions and fallouts from the experiences themselves are properly dealt with and not treated as just tools or way to solve another existing problem but swept under the rug when they've already served their purpose to progress the story.
I also find it hard to believe that Shizune didn't leave a contact number to the clinic Sasuke was staying in case he woke up instead of just checking every few days.
Aside from this though, the story has been wonderfully written. It's not excellent as Phoenix Rising but it's a very good side story to it. Do Naruto and Sasuke every catch a break though? Geez it's like their life is a continuing soap opera.
And oh, it's not that I don't discourage the use of child molestation in a story (since it does happen in real life) but writing a single very good one that's deals with the harms and effects is more effective than writing multiples of them.
| Onokiyo chapter 10 . 6/22
Last chapter, was it the original Sasuke who was in the darkness and left? I only realized it afterwards. Damn. That makes it even sadder. It was like saying a final farewell to both his parents. :(
"Kaa-san..Tou-san.. I love you both so much"
"I wish we could be together again, but.. I'm tired of living in darkness."
Rereading this again made me cry. You're the single author in this fandom who made me cry as much as I did. You are the master writer of Sasuke and Naruto angst.
| Onokiyo chapter 9 . 6/22
While reading Phoenix Rising I always thought that Naruto love both Sasukes equally, but reading this it seems he likes the reborn! sasuke better since he seems to treat this Sasuke more fatherly. So which is it?
That kirin scene was poignant. The way you describe the storms, the reaction, Sasuke's thoughts and everything. It seems so like Sasuke to kill himself rather than let his body become a vegetable. Suicide by kirin was poetic and symbolic. Damn. Sasuke always did know how to make an entrance. Figures he'd also want his exit to be more showy as well.
Those nurses..I bet they really enjoyed bathing and dressing his unconscious form. Sasuke trying to stop himself becoming a vegetable still ended up as one. He never did have luck achieving his plans.
So..is the old Sasuke dead or in the coma? Welcome back reborn Sasuke! Although I'll miss the old sasuke, as crazed as he was. I wanted him and Naruto to have at least a final talk before Sasuke disappears again. I want to hear what Sasuke would say to Naruto after saving him from suicide.
| Onokiyo chapter 8 . 6/22
Lol. Sasuke just gave the get go to Naruto to spank him (or his reborn self) whenever he misbehaves. It was nice hearing about Sasuke talking how he only misbehaves only with Itachi because he feels comfortable enough. No wonder reborn Sasuke always misbehaves around Naruto since the blond does spoil him a lot. haha Sad to hear Sasuke breaking down and cry just so Naruto won't leave him. And with that announcement that he might die soon because of the drugs, he's probably feeling he has no more pride left to lose and just let Naruto comfort him like a father would to a son.
| Onokiyo chapter 7 . 6/22
I agree with one of your reviews. This Sasuke has become to crass and rash. It's like he took lessons from Hidan, was born with Tourettes, swallowed whatever Kabuto gave him 10x over, still have the curse seal, the chain of hatred all combined into one hot, angsty emo pot. He also lost what part of his calmness left and always talks with an exclamation. He's become a caricature of the already caricature of his psychotic avenger from the manga.
| Onokiyo chapter 6 . 6/22
Hoho! So not only was child Sasuke jealous of the original Sasuke but Sasuke was jealous of the kid as well! Maybe he just wants to be spoiled by Naruto.
So that white snake that bit him first was Kabuto's then? That bastard.
And poor Sasuke, peeing the couch at this age! Even though his body's been fast forwarded to his 16 year old self again seems he retains the 6 year olds's bodily function and muscle memory. Lol. The old Naruto would have ridiculed the teme to death, now he seems to have grown up (and possibly want to spare his son from the embarrassment. lol) Sasuke seems oc here though, even though 6 years has passed and he gained the muscle memory of the reborn Sasuke, he seems to be accepting this changes more...quietly (even with that breakdown last chapter) Maybe because it's the lack of introspection about the war and revenge.
| Onokiyo chapter 5 . 6/22
Wow! So Kabuto had a hand in this. Should have known it was him. But does Naruto really want this Sasuke to dissapear? I read Phoenix Rising first and there were little ro no traces of the old Sasuke back. So is Naruto working hard to get back his son even though this Sasuke would go back to being less than a memory? It seems at odds with Naruto's devotion to the old Sasuke during his talks to his son. This Sasuke, although he's still psychotic as ever seems to be affected by his reborn self's feelings towards Naruto. He must be horribly confused now. Haha.
Seeing old Sasuke back though, does this mean that Sakura has the chance to bring him back as well? I really hope there'd be some development to this Sasuke as well (it seems all went to the child Sasuke) before this story is finished.
| Onokiyo chapter 4 . 6/22
This is kind of pitiful...and sad. Sasuke really is beyond the point of no return in his craziness.
| Onokiyo chapter 3 . 6/22
Naruto's coldness towards Sasuke here does seem uncharacteristic of him (based from Phoenix Rising) . Sasuke deserved that talking down though. He was becoming more psychotic. So I expect an explanation would be revealed. Having Sasuke at Naruto's mercy was kind of hot though. If this wasn't a side story to Phoenix Rising I would have wanted them to release their frustration to other physical means. fufu...
But aside from that, the appearance of the old Sasuke seems to counteract against the Phoenix jutsu. I wonder how he was able to return since he shouldn't be able to right?
| Onokiyo chapter 2 . 6/22
Sasuke is really a retard.
| Onokiyo chapter 1 . 6/22
Sasuke is really a bastard here, going after faceless konoha nin's to kill them.
| bluesnowflakes21 chapter 12 . 5/29
it was awesome..
| Rain of the Forest chapter 4 . 5/8
So naruto came up with a different way of trying to get sasuke to come to his senses?
Lavi: I highly doubt it...