|Reviews for Half Asleep|
| MetellaStella chapter 2 . 8/18/2021
This feedback is for Chapter 3. I paused in the middle of it to sleep (heh heh) and left a preliminary comment, but I didn’t remember that you can only leave one review per chapter.
“sound like electricity”
Electricity ... doesn’t make a sound?
“scrubbed with grass and mud till it was clean” idk if this was on purpose but I found this line amusing- getting something “clean” with “dirt.”
Wait ... what use for money would Water Tribe lifestyle even have? It’s implied they live pretty secluded from everyone else (virtually nobody in the real world even ventures past a certain point in the Arctic Circle) and they subsist hunt.
I guess I might write about that myself. (Zuko wanting to help, and going about it the wrong way, it being seen as an empty gesture, stirring Katara’s ire)
This is reminding me of the Native American saying “once all the forest is gone and the rivers are poisoned, you can’t eat money.” Also of course colonizers thinking any sort of reparations is equal to the fact that they pushed them onto the lowest quality lands and territory on the continent.
Maybe the SWT was restricted further and further, too, trying to avoid them, even though there weren’t any outright colonies. FN would have no interest in settling there, but the notion of having captive healers probably forced them to brave the life-threatening conditions. Maybe the ATLA planet is smaller than earth, and it’s warmer there than here?
Buddhists definitely do often put a moratorium on drinking (in fact I believe it’s a more prevalent practice overall than not eating meat!) I’m not sure if you knew that, or if you thought it would be in-character for him.
Funnily enough, though, I seem to remember that spicy food is limited by some Vedic instruction (the Buddha was born in present-day Nepal, so not India proper, but he was an offshoot of the existing traditions) because spicy food ‘over-excites’ the senses. And milder food smooths the temperament. So it’s especially ironic that you’d choose them to have very spicy food. Secular laypeople in India of course damage their mouths (yes it lowkey causes literal damage- that’s what the pain is. It’s not a taste) on the regular, but certain serious and committed practitioners do not.
This goes for overly sugary foods as well (even the Bible gets in on warning against ‘rich foods of the opulent’ like desserts and frequent meat- like at every meal, as was very unusual for the time- as one form of Gluttony)
Indeed, people who go on plant-based whole foods diets often report their taste profiles change, and they notice subtleties that they didn’t previously register in so-misnamed ‘bland’ food.
There was a white guy capitalist who tried to bank on these ancient concepts- you know his name in the Grahm cracker.
Seventh Day Adventists like to pretend they invented these concepts, too.
Aaaaanyway, Guru Pathik would probably frown upon spicy foods, and maybe a few of the Nomads would, too. Perhaps their fruit pies were also less sugary than standard fare elsewhere!
“first girl you ever saw” This bizarre, non-canon idea is strangely prevalent in the fandom. Do people think Kuzon and Bumi didn’t exist alongside girls as Aang traveled all over the world? People act as if he’s sheltered and never set foot outside his gender-segregated Temple. Weird.
I found Aang OOC in this chapter, at least for their first argument in the past- monks would be used to solitude, and the postulation that he would be needy doesn’t fit at all. It would make /much more sense for Katara to be the needy one, but his duties and extensive meditation schedule combine to get on her nerves. She’d /want expect (maybe even demand, with her temperament) typical dating and married life, and that would conflict with his /need to be emotionally self-sufficient and positively detached. On top of that, he’s still grieving for his own father figure- he’d be all sympathy for getting to spend time with her dad. Now, /maybe/ he’d resent her for having that when he didn’t- but he’d at least make a effort to corral that emotion and not to take it out on her, per Buddhist instruction.
| MetellaStella chapter 3 . 8/18/2021
"Tell you what," Toph was saying. "As soon as you can get Sparky to dance in public, I'll be the first one doing a jig on the table. What do you say?"
My Toko shipper brain: YES YES get stodgy prince and too-good-for-this heiress to cut loose TOGETHER! Muahahaha!
| Cocofant chapter 8 . 4/1/2021
I read this fic while half asleep (get it?), but serious, I was really sick so I don't remember or couldn't understand most of it. I did get the vibe that it was complicated and that 90% of it was spirit stuff, which is engaging. Thank you for writing.
| CARO chapter 9 . 3/6/2021
MUY MISTICO, POCO ROMANCE PERO QUEDO MUY BIEN
| HinaRzv chapter 9 . 10/28/2020
This was such an incredible story! the plot is genuinely one of the best I’ve ever read. I don’t think a FF has ever made me scared before but the way you set up the spirit world was so GOOD. I was in serious panic mode for the entirety of the last several chapters lol. Aside from the plot the way you wrote the characters and the relationships is SPOT ON! Zutara, Sukka, MaiLee were all great, but I’m primarily a taang shipper, and I can confidently say you did not disappoint with my favorites at all, I loved their scenes so much (Aang’s apology? THE KISS? All wonderful) Overall I recommend everyone read this story, I LOVED IT!
| Wings As Eagles chapter 9 . 8/27/2020
When I discovered this story, I was only 19. Now, I'm almost 25. this story gets better every time I read it.
Katara's realization, about spending her life half asleep, was really meaningful to me and my current circumstances.
This story is a fantastic example of the heights that fanfiction can reach. This may sound like a bit much, but to me, this story is perfect. There is nothing about it I didn't like. Everything was just 10/10.
One day, when fanfiction gets recognized as respectable literature, this fic definitely belongs in the hall of classics. Bravo
| Allison chapter 9 . 7/16/2020
This was very lovely. I almost cried when Katara decided to choose life. Compelling, strange and an easy fit within the world's lore. Great work, looking forward to reading more
| My Bated Breath chapter 9 . 6/23/2020
I don't know how it's possible for you to write such a lovely Zutara story without Zuko even being present for most of the story - it's truly shown in the dream sequences between our two protagonists, Katara and Aang's struggle to reexamine their relationship, the Zutara interludes scattered throughout, and Katara's sheer tenacity and willpower to save Zuko. Like, if that's not good writing, I don't even know what is. And the Spirit World is absolutely fantastic in this story, truly mysterious and horrifying as the show would want it to be. The action? Yes (action is soooo hard to get right too, especially with wacky spirit shenanigans yet I am invested like there's no tomorrow). The other characters? Also portrayed amazingly, yet their interactions are purposeful in a way that doesn't detract from the story. Actually, I'm not done talking about the Spirit World, because everything with Koh and Azula and KURUK is tied in so well, it's magnificent. 10/10. Would one day read again (when I'm ready for it :) )
Oh yeah and I bookmarked this on Ao3 too, so idk if I already ranted on my feelings in a review there too :P
| Linnn chapter 4 . 6/14/2020
What an astounding chapter! The end gave me chills the way no other work of fan fiction ever has. I love your style and how much nuance there is in your straightforward way of storytelling. Most observant writers tend to get bombastic and it always feels more self-serving than anything. Your writing is visual and dynamic and exists to paint the picture and further the plot, just like the show. I’m enjoying this so much and really don’t want it to end!
| Guest chapter 9 . 6/4/2020
With the recent revival of the ATLA fandom, I saw a recommendation for this fic floating around tumblr, and I am SO GLAD I checked it out. This was wonderful! The characterization was spot on, the Spirit World was appropriately creepy, and all the emotions - good and bad - felt so real. You had me hooked from the first chapter. I couldn't stop reading, even when I knew I'd suffer at work the next day. Thank you for sharing this with us! It was a treat!
| Guest chapter 1 . 2/23/2020
You're so good. I love this already!
| Guest chapter 9 . 2/23/2020
WHAT AN ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL STORY
I read this one when i first got into atla back in 2012 and while i did appreciate it a lot, rereading and sighing over some select parts, i dont think i realised just what a...masterpiece this one is? Like you've got the characters down amazingly well, i can FEEL them saying and doing the things they do in this story, and you do justice to ABSOLUTELY everybody - including mai and aang! - and capture the beautiful, beaaaaautiful (individual and group) friendship dynamics which is exactly what ELEVATES this story to a level beyond everything else. It's so rare to find stories like this where the spirit of atla and what it was about is honoured while also making zuko and katara find their way to each other in such a poignant and wholesome way like skskskskskksksksj i can't. To write zutara and keep it anchored in the foundation of friendship and trust the whole gaang built through the series like that...why aren't there more stories like this around. Gaah. So pure.
Thank you for giving life to the essence of these beloved characters and the absolutely larger-than-life potential of this ship with your beautiful story. I hope you write more gaang and zutara and taang in the future. 3
| mannaajzi chapter 1 . 2/23/2020
(Posting again because im doubtful about whether my previous guest review got posted and yeah)
THIS STORY HAS MY HEART. ITS EVERYTHING
I LOVVEEEEE THAT YOU HAVE PUT SO MUCH LOVE INTO EVERY CHARACTER. YES ok zutara is my otp and i love them but THIS STORY. THIS STORY. it's like you held my chin through the screen and said, look, here, let me remind you why you love them so much and so painfully because they're part of a whole - a whole thats built on the guiding principles of shared love, trust, friendship, respect and total badassery. My larger than life otp in a larger than life fanon continuation of a beloved show. Your characters are perfectly written and reflect the complexities of the original characters down to their every action. I love me some zutara but what i love more is that you didnt diminish anyones humanity to build them up and said, zutara is an ideal BECAUSE of their friendship/shared pain and not despite or separate from it and thats just truly truly *chefs kiss*
The writing is amazing, that description of Katara's waterbending ooomf *heart eyes* the story is SO AMAZINGLY tightly constructed, the flashbacks are *clutches heart* the angst is so...human and *pulls hair, cries tears* the humour is HEARTWARMING but most importantly THE STORY HAS A SOUL. The most magnificent thing! THIS STORY BREATHES. The spirit of this (fan) story is the SAME as the spirit of the original canon and do you know how much i love that, how easily i can imagine this to be the natural continuation of the series (teehe with the otp i wanted) without it diminishing or divorcing from the original story or characters in any way. You have truly blessed us with this masterpiece. I read this story before (2012 when i entered the atla fandom) and i've read it again and it just gets you everytime! You're wonderful!
Thank you! Please write more gaang and zutara soon. 333333
| TheNextPage chapter 3 . 1/15/2020
You glorious creature, you added the Cabbage merchant!All the loves for that!
Iroh! urgh, my heart is all melty and warm.
i appreciate the kids drunken arguments. Whew, this is engaging.
| TheNextPage chapter 2 . 1/15/2020
I found your other work on ao3 and I was so excited to get into that... except that story follows this one and I can't rightly spoil this story by reading that one first! *le sigh*
Your pacing is excellent. We linger and settle in the places we need to, carry on past the things which are filling time.
The DragonHawk... i'm hoping it pops up later and has some serious relevance to Katara's traipsing through the Spirit World. The little details Iroh was getting into, i genuinely enjoyed that.
You are a talent and I am well pleased I've stumbled upon this, a decade later! What good fortune!