Reviews for Winner
Guest chapter 1 . 3/22/2013
Nice poem ;)
sfbxfcb chapter 1 . 6/4/2011
Wonderful!
skyfiresarah not a real name chapter 1 . 12/12/2010
I loved the concept for this poem: Auden's need to "win" is an important topic, and hard to write about. You pinointed her emotional state and need to succeed, as well as Eli's view of that need, perfectly. That being said, however, in both poems and stories, a point is often more effective if it is implied, rather than spelled out. If you had written about her emotional view point and her family and Eli without explicitly saying why she felt the things she felt, it might have had more of an emotional impact. At the moment it sounds like an explanation, but with just a little bit of work it really could sound like a great poem that takes her intense desire to please and drives it home emotionally. There are some great lines in there all ready: though you say you're not a poet, and although you don't seem to have taken any poetry classes or anything like that, you are naturally a good writer and poet. Just think about how to make it less like an explanation. GREAT job overall, though.

Thanks for writing such a cool poem,

Skyfiresarah.