Reviews for Revolution
Guest chapter 1 . 7/6/2012
Colonel at twenty five? You expect me to believe this kid went up 7 pay-grades in only three years? Kiss my ass, there's suspension of disbelief then there's insulting my fucking intelligence.
By the way colonels don't participate in field ops, do you research next time idiot.
wolfissac chapter 5 . 3/7/2011
Good! A piece of advice: when writing Alex during combat that is to come don't make him seem nevous or paniky. He's the team leader and can't afford to lose focus. Also I think that it would make more sense for the team to be fighting several smaller groups. Basically a scout unit can be 2-6 soldiers and generally several are sent out usually at least 3. And depending on the situation these groups could be special forces such as Spetznas or paratroopers. After that the main force of Armor and Infantry would move up.

Russian Armor: T-55, T-62, T-72, T-80 and T-90 tanks. The T-90 is relatively new and not many would likely be employed. There are more T-80's but the standard is still the T-72 and T-62. A few T-55's are still used but these are old (first manufactured in 1948). Ukrainians would have all except the T-90 and probably only a handful of T-80's. Rebels would mostly have the older tanks (first three listed).

Russian APC's: APC stands for Armored Personel Carrier. These are tracked or wheeled vehicles that are lighter than tanks but heavier than Humvees, Jeeps, etc. The Russians employ the BMP-1 and BMP-2 among others. I think I've ranted long enough for the moment. I added this to help you out for later chapters and if you use any of this I can find the specs for them. Update soon.
wolfissac chapter 4 . 2/28/2011
That was an interesting chapter. Made me laugh at the end when Alex made Darren run the course again. This story is getting good. You should probably send the team into combat soon though. Update soon.

And thanks for the heads up about the update.
wolfissac chapter 3 . 2/21/2011
Ok. Not bad. There are some subject-verb agreement issues but beyond that the structure is fine.

One thing though: do you intend for the Ghosts to be a British unit? Because they weren't in the games. If you intend on making them an American unit like they were in the games then I would suggest removing any of the British slang (sod, bolloks, lad, etc.) because we Americans don't use them and other people who read this and have played the games (which I would think they would have or they wouldn't have come to this section to begin with) might get confused.

There is something else that bothered me. John's rank is Colonel according to your story. Now the problem with that is that it is nigh impossible to attain the rank of Colonel by age 25 and very seldom are Colonels allowed into a combat situation (at least in the US Armed Forces, I don't know about Britain). Keeping in mind that a Colonel is a high ranking officer the appropriate rank for John would more probably be Corporal. Also there is no way a Lieutenant like Hansen would be giving a mission briefing, that is the job for a senior officer like the Major. In point of fact, Alex would in all probability be a Captain (this is for reference) because special forces units are structured differently than the regular army and the experience of a higher ranking officer is usually needed along with their additional authority. Also, the more appropriate term for the unit when they all were in the briefing room would be platoon, since each team that was dispached would be a squad.

I didn't mean to rant on like this but I think this story has a lot of potential and I am a tad neurotic when it comes to accuracy (especially when discussing military related topics, history too) but that aside I would like to think that this information will help you out later. And if you want I can assist you with any questions you have for me to the best of my ability.

Update Soon.