Reviews for Little monster
Ande chapter 1 . 8/8
At least try to fix your grammar. And use spell check! For goodness sake, your stories could be amazing if you used proper spelling and grammar. They're such silly mistakes too. Some of the words aren't even used correctly!
Ashleigh chapter 13 . 10/30/2015
Is it just me or are you using song lyrics in your story

Grenade lyrics

Black, black, black and blue
Beat me 'til I'm numb
Tell the devil I said "Hey" when you get back to where you're from
Erm chapter 1 . 10/27/2015
Sorry that this isn't as constructive as it could be but the style of writing is very... strange. It doesn't seem to flow right at all and is very broken making the narrative difficult to follow. There is some potential there too I suppose, and I like the plot but this is in serious need of adjusting. Practice makes perfect though doesn't it? Uploading amateur work onto the internet for anyone to read is a brave move, a skill that is highly needed in good writers. Keep going and don't let some criticism put you off! :)
Tourmaline20 chapter 15 . 10/12/2014
This is a great story, but you really need to rework the ending. I can't see Uther ever agreeing to to allow a magical creature/wolf that helped the sorcerer who tried to kill Arthur live in Camelot no matter what the circumstances. Also, I can't see Merlin asking Uther for something like that, it would make more sense for merlin to have Steallick go live with his mother or the druids and ask uther for something else. Da kids helped Merlin through everything, and you said that many of them have poor home lives so it would make mores sense for Merlin to ask the one's in bad situations to be allowed to serve in the palace kitchens or stables. Then those children could get away from their parents and live in the castle where it is safe. Or Merlin could ask for some raw goods (blankets, food, firewood, clothes, etc. ) and distribute it evenly amongst his friends. that seem far more like something Merlin would do then the ending you wrote.
Linorien chapter 15 . 6/22/2014
I loved this story! Six-year old Merlin was fantastic and Da Kids were great. I do not doubt that our Merlin would be having mud fights and telling great stories with the kids no matter his age. I love how you kept an air of innocence throughout the entire piece as well. Nice work.
Aithusa Vase chapter 2 . 3/13/2014
6 year olds, especially Merlin, don't talk like they're 2. Also, it's *deer.
adelanor chapter 1 . 1/26/2014
Nice start but too many mistakes... "Dear" is written deer and there are a few other. It could become really enjoyable without the mistakes maybe you coukd get a beta?
Guest chapter 12 . 5/11/2013
"I Morlace introduce your new King and ruler. The might sorcerer Mycroft." I read this and burst out laughing.
flora chapter 4 . 2/4/2013
this is a great story! i recon your a pretty good writer , its funny and yet when you read it you understand that its not a very good thing that merlin cant control his magic even though he,s so cute t: . you should write some more
Millythe96 chapter 15 . 9/9/2012
Soo cute! I love it!
Guest chapter 2 . 7/2/2012
!
Petrabrownie chapter 11 . 4/23/2012
Enjoying this but it's spoilt by silly spelling & grammatical errors. You obviously haven't had it beta'd. You write well so you would benefit from doing so
bluebird chapter 15 . 8/14/2011
loved it, was a really lovely story & very realistic- sounded just like the way i imagined merlin 2 be
mia-dcwut-09 chapter 15 . 5/24/2011
this was epic i loved reading it
and i adore reading little merlin
V chapter 5 . 3/29/2011
I love the concept of this story. I love how you laid out the plot of the story, but I found the lack of editing made this story very difficult to read. Spellcheck and read your work over carefully before posting if you can't find a beta. You have a fab imagination - polish would make it stand out.
117 | Page 1 2 3 4 .. Last Next »