|Reviews for Dual Journey|
| Master of The Wild Card chapter 1 . 10/15/2012
Sorry, my review suddenly sent itself before I could finish, so if it shows up incomplete, then that's why.
Anyways, lets try that again shall we?
I read Green Midnight and am reading this remake, and I'm loving itso much more than the original. Your skill has improved a lot from when you wrote GM.
I'm actually curious about a few things:
First, what will Minako's (Hamuko's) Ultimate Persona be like?
Second, do you plan on giving Messiah a larger role in this story (ie. being Minato's Ultimate Persona)? Or will Thanatos or Orpheus Telos fulfill that role?
Third; will you be keeping the Minor Arcana Social Links in here? I thought that was a clever idea on your part.
Lastly; this is a bit unrelated, but do you do Persona beta-reads? I have a few ideas for a Persona fic, but I'd like a beta reader to help me with ideas and plot and the such.
| Master of The Wild Card chapter 6 . 10/15/2012
I read Green Midnight and am reading this rewrite, and I'm loving it so much more than the original. Your skills are much better than now than when you wrote GM.
I'm actually curious about a few things:
First; what will Minako's (Hamuko's) Ultimate Persona be like.
Second; will you give Messiah a larger r
| Personaddict07 chapter 1 . 6/15/2012
Is it just me or are they oblivious to the Dark Hour? I think that you forgot to mention the transition from the normal midnight to the DH. Since when they got off the station the sky was green already. I just noticed this but if it was intentional then by all means... go ahead. :D
| Mistress of Madness chapter 6 . 3/28/2012
Okay, first off, let me tell you that you're doing a great job on this and that i have no complaint about the COMPs, if you're going to change that part i guess they could be chokers, you know like the one Yukari wears.
Second, please tell that Hamuko is really just fangirling over Shinji, 'cuz honestly I'm an Aki fan. Maybe you could make Hamuko fall for Aki or something, but if you want her to end up with Shinji I have nothing against that, for you are the author and you can do whatever you want.
And lastly, the development between Yukari and Minato is waaaay to fast. I mean, shouldn't he be a bit more wary of her, after all she did attempt to shoot them earlier.
Okay that about sums it up. Hi-five for the longest review I have ever written
| ChaosRune chapter 6 . 9/2/2011
Very nice, I liked a lot the part where Minato did research in their Persona and Arcana, it was cool to read that, specially the part of Thanatos. And good job in explaining the part of the game stats, but Im surprised that no one (specially Jumpei) did any cracks or jokes about it being like in a videogame.
I have only 1 tip or advice for you, try to slow down in the romantic development, its kind of boring to read the romance parts of a story when the end pairing is so painfully obvious. Its more interesting and fun to wonder if they are really going to end together, or even if they like each others, not like here right now where nobody would be surprised if they start dating in the next chapter. Of course, all that is my opinion, but normally a slower relationship development works better for long fics like this one.
All in all, good story, so I hope to see an update soon
| ChaosRune chapter 5 . 9/2/2011
Nice chapter, I specially liked the description of the battle in the bridge, and was that the Reaper that killed their parents? Or are they only trapped inside him?
I find it interesting that you are adding "It brings thee closer to thy destiny" to the SL messages, an important plot change, or its nothing?
Also, whats up with:
The card exploded into blue light and dissipated over the group, except for Ikutsuki. 'Huh? I'm guessing this Link is for the entire group, but then, why wasn't the Chairman bathed in the card's light as well? Eh, whatever,' he thought as he felt the familiar rush and time resumed.
You would think that the son of detectives would be more interesting in stuff like that, or is this a case of PIS (Plot Induced Stupidity)?
| ChaosRune chapter 4 . 9/2/2011
Im sorry, Im still not very sure which is the pairing for Minato, maybe Yukari? (/sarcasm off), lol but seriously, its this going to be purely MinatoxYukari? One of the joys of the game was the multiple relationships you could make in the game with different females, and it would be a complete shame if you remove that completely. Also, Im kind of confused why they are that attracted to each other so fast, they have barely know each other for 3-4 days, and in that time Minato thought she was going to shoot them when they meet, so this development really comes from the left field and feels way too rushed
| ChaosRune chapter 3 . 9/2/2011
Interesting change, making them fight dragons is going to be interesting, so points for making an original fight from the 1st Arcana
| ChaosRune chapter 2 . 9/2/2011
Mmm a couple of questions, why was Minato admiring Yukari? One would think that he would be wary of her because she pointed a gun at them, it makes no sense to think like that about her at this point, unless its to point out the pairing you are going to use in the fic. Also, in the conversation with Jumpei, Yukari never said anything about "last night", so maybe you forgot to add that line, or Jumpei can read minds here lol
| Cstan chapter 5 . 8/21/2011
Nice story so far, I like it.
So, Humako has hoplophobia? Was it because of Aigis (I assume that the "person" who saved them was Aigis and not one of her sisters) or because of the Reaper? Both used guns but the Reaper killed her parents...
Hm, although I'm interested in how you'll continue this I'm most eager to read how the twins "reunion" with Aigis is going to play out.
See you next chapter.
| kingdomlily chapter 6 . 7/5/2011
Plz wright more soon I am so loving this story
| Arkshire the 11th chapter 6 . 5/27/2011
Dude,I gotta inform you that someone's been using parts of this story for their own fic,well that's what I noticed by reading it anyway. The fic's title is Person3: Unexpected Life by my-harmony4ever. You have to read it yourself so that you can judge if the author's plagiarizing your work.
| True-Oblivion chapter 6 . 5/2/2011
good story, keep it up and i cant wait til they meet Aigis
| Yunie1827 chapter 2 . 4/25/2011
hi hi :D
this story is really interesting...im sooo happy that Naoto's there :D
i do hope that if you make a persona 4 story this would be the background or past of Naoto :D anyway i just finished the game and I like how the characters are related like with toriumi..well i haven't read all but Good Job :D
| kou32 chapter 6 . 3/8/2011
I recently finished the green midnight, and i thought it was going rather well, anyways love this fanfic, you are the first person that i know of that has used the Reaper in a Megami Tensei/Person fanfiction and i thank you.
Quick question are you going to have the other characters find out about the Velvet room, I liked that you put that in there, the double date with Mitsuru, Minato, Theo, and Elizabeth was hilarious.
I also look forward to seeing what the jester has in store this time.
To Jester:Hey Jester you are my favorite OC.
Anyways i Look forward to the next chapter, see ya.