|Reviews for Patriot's Dawn|
| ForSer chapter 22 . 8/15
| ForSer chapter 8 . 8/14
Great chapter. I'm sad for Asuma, but it makes fic more real.
| ForSer chapter 6 . 8/14
It's got boring. What's wrong with naruto, fighting like that with some thug? Why hi didn't use his kunai with airblades or some elemental genjustsu?
| abhinav chapter 7 . 7/25
have more romance in the apart from that good fic
| SlyUzumakiVii chapter 16 . 7/3
oh my awesome... asuma' s knives as whips?! hot damn that's awesome honestly if he can do that he's beyond his teacher in the terms of wind manipulation but them again as you universe stated asuma plateau' d after the guardians and was waiting for retirement so it makes sense. honestly by far the most original weapon I've ever seen in fanfiction I literally had to stop reading and write this. Also must be a chakra heavy technique that only Naruto or people with above jounin levels of chakra or control would need. but seriously that was beastly! I may be a huge fan of kenjutsu and swords but holy he'll that's awesome... okay back to reading I really hope this story isn't dead as just wow!
| SlyUzumakiVii chapter 8 . 7/2
holy crap everything was sunny and fluffy... than woah... hard and realistic love the flip
| kindasortastantheman chapter 22 . 6/17
Can I just say, holy shit that was amazing. You took the major events of cannon, and pretty much said f-u to what most people would expect. And I absolutely love it. You didn't just copy what's supposed to happen and give him a few new abilities like a lot of authors do, you made your own story. You made a lot of interesting changes and developments take place, and I couldn't be more thrilled to get to read about them.
Even if I am still sad that Yamato died, that dude was like my favorite. Also, that cliff hanger tho. That's not right, but it's still absolutely genius. There won't be a Sasuke retrieval mission at this rate, and I seriously wonder what Tsunade will do when she finds out... If she finds out.
| Phantomslap chapter 6 . 6/16
Asuma is definitely gonna die. I can feel it. Naruto's paranoia and Asuma talking to him like that. Teaching him to not compare himself to others. At first I thought kiba or Ino, but his and Naru's conversation sealed it for me.
| Insane darkness chapter 22 . 6/14
That was amazing. I read it in one sitting. You are an amazing author, and it's rare to find that in fanfiction (it being mostly amatuers). I can't wait for the sequel!
| Kikuriki chapter 1 . 6/13
I'm confused as to why you keep referring to Sasuke as 'myopic'. Myopic means near sighted. And yeah, it can be used to describe 'near sighted' as in he only thinks short term, but most people (especially someone who owns glasses themselves, like me) read Myopic and think of him needing glassesnot that I'm against it, but... Itachi is a myopic Uchiha. Sarada is a myopic Uchiha. Sasuke is short sighted and needs to learn to think long term.
| MegaMindAuthor chapter 1 . 6/10
Romance is good in a story, keeps the story interesting and act like a rainbow after a storm. But when it comes to this show, things like love, attachment will always ruin some things during the storyline, that was why in the case of the canon, people starting pairing up as soon as it was after the war. And most importantly they are kids, like seriously, Naruto having hormones and the mindset to notice females.
| MegaMindAuthor chapter 1 . 6/9
Writing; Precis, straightforward but needs more explanations about some tidbits you wrote. Love this beginnig but would have liked the start to be canon-like.
| Katt chapter 22 . 5/27
This has been pure gold, really sad you left it at this...
| Guest chapter 6 . 5/24
Naruto sounds fucking stupid. This was "bloody gorgeous", "Here you go mate", "These kids are scrubs" like it's not even what Naruto would say it's just you incorporating shit that you probably say in real life into him. Fucking sounds like a retarded 5 year old saying scrub
| JustADamFrenchFry chapter 2 . 5/23
If this story revolves more around Naruto being more driven as a Shinobi, why are the team assignments changing so drastically? I see no method in the teams. Ino-Shika-Cho was created for information gathering, Kiba, Shino, and Hinata were to be a tracking team, and, in canon, team 7 was a heavy hitter team with the top Kunoichi, the Rookie of the Year, and the Dead Last to balance out the power. I can see why Shikamaru would be on team 7 since he's most likely dead last now, but that knocks out Ino-Shika-Cho's team dynamics and throws off all the teams' purpose in the field. Sorry for ranting. I understand that it's your story to do as you wish, but I figured it would've stayed the same due to Sasuke and Naruto's friendship and similar strive to grow stronger.