Reviews for Gryffindors Never Die
BlazeStryker chapter 14 . 12/30/2023
So, he IS a Headbastard.

Make him die.
Cool Guest chapter 14 . 11/11/2023
All things considered Harry looks very bad in my eyes by the end of this chapter. The part of Voldemort possessing his body briefly made me think he wasn't accountable for his actions, but the way it happened with Voldemort clearly stating what he was about to do to make it easy for him to be stopped in between everything else leads me to believe that was a skit, a fake performance to make Dumbledore feel bad and for Harry to get out of trouble. Every other part of the chapter had Harry blitzing through doing as he pleased without fear of consequences. Like everything was planned and accounted for. He manipulated the ministry like a fiddle a long with everyone else and then he had the gal to brag about it.

It just doesn't make sense that by the end he apparently got the good will of his house-mates and an apologetic Dumbledore. Beyond him being more of a yerk than at any point before, he was also manipulative to boot without shame.

They don't seem in the path to becoming more mature, rather is like the world around our main characters is becoming more accepting of them as they are without needing them to grow or change.
Guest chapter 12 . 10/20/2023
Fun fact: You can save big money by buying your condoms in bulk, boxes of one thousand units are cheapest. If you have about as much sex as the average American and always use condoms you will run out in about ten years.
Cool Guest chapter 11 . 10/20/2023
Harry and Ron aren't telling Dumbledore about future threats even when lives are at stake. The story doesn't even give an excuse or flawed reasoning for it, it just says they decided not to tell him.

Harry and Ron make no attempt to motivate Dumbledore to stop Umbridge from being hired, yet they do ask him not to save her life, tell him how she will be at risk, and don't explicitly don't do the same for Mad-eye. The just give a half truth, that they didn't know who killed him, despite knowing well when and the circumstances that got him killed. Why so secretive? Harry razed Privet Drive #4 already, in not like the same situation would likely come up again.

Also if sneaking out of Hogwarts was so important, why must they keep it a secret?

I also found it difficult to swallow that wizards can regrow bones, but not kidneys, sure Harry seems more noble for his donation, but that doesn't answer why that happened this time around and not previously. Even if it was indirectly, Harry going back in time somehow lead to Remus kidney failure. Harry taking responsibility is appropriate.

Then there was the pain in Harry's scar. Harry shrug off multiple Cruciatus curses that he let himself take for the sake of having Voldemort get back his body like last time for some reason that still hasn't come up. Yet it is the scar pain that shakes him deeply? That seems backwards.
Cool Guest chapter 10 . 10/19/2023
Razing his aunt and uncle's house, and then having the daily prophet release a special night issue just to report on it? Harry is insane! How is he getting away with it?

Either Harry's potion didn't last days, just a few hours. Or it lasted days but there were missing transitions for Defense and transfiguration happening on different days. Ron didn't seem to be joking about Harry being loopy for days, so if we don't do the story the courtesy of assuming those things happened on different days the story just appears to contradict itself there.

McGonagall teaching the Vanishing spells during transfiguration class... I honestly can't come up with any scenario that would explain that happening. She is not supposed to be teaching Charms that aren't related to her subject.

The narrative and world building has been losing cohesion.
Cool Guest chapter 9 . 10/19/2023
This part,

"The Delacour's of France feel indebted to you, because you rescued young Gabrielle when you did not need to. Monseigneur Delacour is a very important member of the French Ministry. If I remember his last promotion, he is now a well respected member of the French equivalent of the Wizengamot. Deeply light sided family. "

It would have been so simple just to have Fleur be with the other two champions and be indebted for the same reason they were.
Instead the story includes this nonsense. When did Harry rescued Gabrielle and why? This reads as if he went back into the lake, after he was long done with the task, a task in which he never had to go into the lake in the first place, despite the fact he knew Gabriel was never in any danger, all just because he knew that the gesture would put him on the good graces if the Delacour.

So instead of having Harry be responsible for promptly getting Fleur to safety from actual danger, Harry does something absurd off-screen for the sake of manipulating the Delacours into liking him, with the only clear reason provided been because they are influential.

He was mentioned to have fought merpeople when he in his vault. I was confused at that until I got to the part above. So that's when and why he fought the merpeople. Of course, all that was done off-screen. So we will never know how he did it, or what excuse Harry might have used for doing all that.

Why, just why?
Cool Guest chapter 8 . 10/19/2023

Harry is perfectly able to capture Peter and arrange for Crunch Jr. to not even show up to the graveyard and be apprehended, but he still gets suffered through some cruciatus curses and let's Voldemort go?

Like, was there no way to capture him really?
Cool Guest chapter 5 . 10/16/2023
It seems Harry never had an interest on anyone famous or involved in current events not directly involved with him. As he doesn't show an once of sympathy towards his well wishers or fans.

His actitude was disrespectful, it would have been understandable if he had calmly taken the stack of letters delivered in front of him and promptly dispose of them never having any interest in opening them; but getting upset at other people having an interest or opinion towards him? That's inappropriate, and something he should have learned to accept a long time ago. For his own mental health.
Cool Guest chapter 2 . 10/15/2023
I found this story from a funny collection.

The first chapter was interesting but in no way funny, so I was pleasantly surprised when the second chapter started to show this stories true colors.

I like what I have read very much.

I would have liked it better if Harry and Ron had spoken flawless Spanish, but Hermione response was priceless regardless.
SarcasticallySatyrical chapter 18 . 9/10/2023
I personally love some elements of this so so much. Finally a crack fic with internal logicHarry and co act like this because he’s a drunk 60 year old man child. But the characters never grow or change and thats a bit much for me.
RHJunior chapter 2 . 8/23/2023
What kind of idiot child thinks that executing unrepentant murderers would ruin someone's life?
Cassandra30 chapter 1 . 8/21/2023
Interesting beginning.
scareDcat chapter 18 . 7/30/2023
absolutely brilliant- thank you! can I ask, did Ron marry Luna from that 'see you at home' comment I assume so but what happened to Hermione after Hogwarts? and how did Harry rescue Gabrielle?
again, brilliant and cheered up a rainy Sunday x
Guest chapter 18 . 7/15/2023
Love it!
CharmedArtist chapter 18 . 5/31/2023
This was FANTASTIC from start to finish! Thank you for sharing!
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