i cant wait under tile you do

i cant wait under tile you do chapter 11

Your story line is good... but also rambling - "He closed the door, changed, and let Elreria back in...?"

Try reading over your story. You have a lot of grammar, spelling errors (the 'Beor Mtns.', not the 'Boar Mtns.')

Interesting new character... Try to find a special thing only they can do.

Good!

Mr. Moo

I don't like Elreria, but it's good otherwise. I'd love it if you could delete her, quickly!

Interesting, if a bit unpolished. The concept has a lot of potential, and I like where you seem to be going with it, but I think that you should get a beta reader to help with clarity and grammar. Regardless, I await your next update.

i cant waith under you do chapter 9

this is pretty good, but truthfuly i'm not a big fan of your dragman character but i still look forward to the next chapter.

This is a great story. And I really like it and hope you will post soon, but I wonder where the Dragman thingy came from. I'm not sure I really like it.

What happened to Eragon? Haven't seen him since the brief unconscious encounter.

I r eager to see where this goes.

Post soon.

I really liked this story! I LOVE the Eragon series and the LOTR and have been waiting for a story that involves Legolas! I like what I have read of your story and look forward to seeing where the plot goes and how Legolas takes to meeting Saphira!

You really need to go over these chapters before you publish them.

Not withstanding the OOC of Arya, Legolas and Angela, there are also minor spelling and grammar mistakes, and you've used the right word in the wrong place several times.

Not a bad chapter though.

Not a bad chapter, but you need to go back over and look for spelling and grammar mistakes.

I've read worse torture scenes, but that was the most extensive one I've ever read.