Reviews for Jessica's Ultimate Fail
Jessica chapter 7 . 5/22
Kit.Kat.Bar.27 chapter 1 . 3/26
i loved all the author notes
Me chapter 7 . 11/11/2017
My idea is that they do a play in the cafeteria and the Cullens are doing it (as well as Bella)and Jessica makes a fool of herself
Me chapter 5 . 11/11/2017
musicaldolphingirl2011 chapter 7 . 9/28/2016
It would be awesome if Emmett started a food fight in the cafeteria and Bella threw an apple and it broke Jessica's nose or have her a black eye. It would also be funny if one of Jessica's boy toys announced to the whole school how she gave him a STD.
Snarry4life chapter 7 . 7/27/2014
First of all I love your added AN's. I love both stories, this one and Edward's suffering. You have done a fantastic job on them, they are funny!
Guest chapter 7 . 1/7/2014
Yes after they eat people food it sit in there tummy till they can expelit by vomiting:)
IvoryKeys001 chapter 2 . 10/31/2013
A terribly awful story with no plot, just rambling, and your authors notes are really stupid nobody cares whether you think she's a bimbo just don't do it
Shawna chapter 7 . 10/30/2013
Another great chapter. What if you had all the Cullens go to a school dance and Jessica came too? Jessica could see Edward dancing with Bella and she could get all jealous. She could go over and try to talk to Edward and rub her hips seductively against his and bat her eyelashes. Edward could push her away and tell her he's not interested in her and go back to dancing with Bella. Jessica could get angry, grab Bella by her hair and throw her to the ground and tell Bella to leave Edward alone, that he's hers and if she touches him she'll kick her butt all the way back to Arizona where she came from.

The Cullens of course hear this, stop dancing and surround her in a tight circle (at vampire speed, mind you,) and once again, give her the ready-to-kill looks. Jessica becomes frightened and Emmett tells her once again to leave Bella and Edward alone.

Jessica is tiered of being turned down and tells Edward that he'd better dump Bella and choose her or else. Emmett laughs and says 'or else what?'

Jessica suddenly grabs Bella, holds her to her chest and puts a knife to her throat and says 'or else I'll kill her.'

The Cullens, still surrounding her, go into protective and dangerous vampire mode, they growl viciously at her and sink into half-crouches, ready to attack. Jasper warns her to put the knife down and let Bella go or they'll kill her where she stands. Jessica reminds them that she has a knife but Emmett interrupts her and says menacingly that a knife won't do her any good, they can kill her faster than she could blink, she wouldn't have time to even lift her arm an inch before she's dead.

Jessica could laugh and say they don't have any weapons but Alice interrupts and says they do have weapons, weapons that are much stronger, much more deadly and lethal than that pathetic knife she has. Jessica laughs nervously and asks "guns?'

The Cullens tighten the circle around her, making her feel like a trapped rat, and growl again, while sinking deeper into their crouches, prepared to spring. Jessica could say in her narration that they're like a pack of ravenous wolves ready to take down their prey. She notices that their once golden eyes have now turned coal black, which frightens her even more.

Rosalie says they don't need guns to kill someone. But they do have weapons, just not the kind of weapons that she would think of.

Edward tells her they mean it and says if she doesn't release Bella by the time he counts to three they'll attack and there'll be no way she could fight them off.

Jessica gives a shaky laugh and says 'yeah, right.'

Jasper tells her they mean it and warns her not to push them. He sends out a wave of fear toward her, making her own fear stronger. Jessica eyes Jasper fearfully and narrates that all the Cullens seemed deadly right then, but Jasper seemed the most lethal of them all. She decides she'd better not push them anymore and releases Bella, who runs into Edward's arms.

Emmett holds out his hand and orders her to hand over knife. She fearfully obeys and Emmett suddenly grabs her by hair, puts hand clutching knife up to her face and crushes it easily before her terrified, shocked eyes. He holds the small pile of what's now pulp in front of her and asked if she saw what he just did. She nods fearfully and he says that's how easily they could kill her. They could do it without any effort and there'd be no way she could fight them off. He asks if she understands and she says yes.

Emmett throws her to floor and orders her to leave. Jessica scrambles to her feet and runs down the hall and into an abandoned classroom, shutting the door behind her. After locking it, she puts her back toward it and slides down door, onto floor and begins crying with fear. She begins to think, after this terrifying experience if trying to get Edward Cullen to like her is really worth her life.

And you could end the chapter there. So what do ya think? I gave you some pretty cool ideas ha? You don't have to use them all if you don't want to, but I think it would make a great, suspenseful chapter! Please consider it? Please? It would make my day to see this chapter in the story! Good luck!
Shawna chapter 5 . 10/30/2013
Another wonderful chapter. I loved how the Cullens all ganged up on her, scared her out of her wits and put her in her place! Wonderful! Please continue.
Shawna chapter 4 . 10/30/2013
Another wonderful chapter. I loved how Jessica almost crashed! Comic! Please continue.
Shawna chapter 3 . 10/30/2013
I thought it was a pretty good chapter. I loved how Emmett started laughing at her! Priceless! Please continue!
Shawna chapter 2 . 10/30/2013
Another wonderful chapter. I loved the dry ice idea! Great job!
Shawna chapter 1 . 10/30/2013
Great first chapter. This is my first time reading this story and I love what I've read so far! Keep up the good work!
Guest chapter 7 . 4/17/2013
Have Carlisle and same talk to her and she sounds like an idiot all dreamy like, Im going to be the mother of your kids. And laugh at her.
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