Reviews for Deflection
Eleri McCleod chapter 6 . 9/15/2013
A good read here. I enjoyed the different perspectives of the battle and aftermath. I also enjoyed the open-ended questions you left us with. Maybe one day you'll continue where this left off.

Keep writing!
Tisley chapter 6 . 10/28/2012
I didn't realize you'd finished it! I came over here looking for something to re-read and found it. You're right - I never saw that ending coming, and I think it'd be a great idea for a new story...hint, hint... :) Great wrap-up!
Anon chapter 6 . 9/26/2012
I like closure. And this was very satisfying closure. Thank you for that.
Dana Hale chapter 6 . 9/26/2012
I loved the conflicting views of Scout and Tank. For Scout to distrust the Captain's leadership- wow- there's a cool story line waiting to happen. But it was nice of him to notice the Captain's inner pain and not mention it yet- unless Pilot died, then we would see just how protective Scout was of Pilot. Hawk's point of view was also very heartfel and understandable considering his past losses. The start of this chapter was neat in that I had no idea who the voices were in Captain's dream, but like you said in your note, if you stop to think about it, there are several options. So the way you started and then also how you ended it, you made us think with this one. Great story!
Anon chapter 5 . 9/22/2012
Absolutely awesome. As usual.
Windjammers chapter 5 . 9/22/2012
You've got to love those muses. Usually, the muse and the gut are your best writing barometers. When your head wants to go one way with a story, and they want to go another, all you can do is buckle up and hang on. :)

I think you did a great job with the Captain's story. Angsty, guilt-ridden, self-doubting, you've got Jon running the gamut of emotions. And you brought up a GREAT story plot about how unnecessary the wars have been. How pointless. It was all Dread's fault that they lived and survived and died and fought the way they did. One person put the world to the torch, and even with all the fighting everyone was doing, they just weren't making any headway. That had to be discouraging. How many times did they want to give up? How many people did? Was Dread such an insurmountable force that no matter what anyone in the Resistance did, it wouldn't matter in the long run?

There are a lot of POVs that could chip in on the next chapter. Blastarr? Soaron? What about Dread? Or someone on the ground who witnessed everything that happened? What about Stuart Power himself in the afterlife thinking about the situation? Rotating POVs? Whatever the muse hints at, you'll do a great job fanfictionalizing it. :)
Tisley chapter 5 . 9/22/2012
I enjoyed reading the first several chapters when I first found this forum, and I'm so glad you've continued. Your characterization is really spot-on; I could completely see him berating himself like this. It'd be interesting to see why he agreed to go in the first place and if he really made a bad decision or it's just his guilt and fear talking. Looking forward to more!
Dana Hale chapter 5 . 9/22/2012
Oh but I love reading CP fic containing a "tormented, guilt-ridden, self-doubting Jon when Jennifer takes the brunt of the injuries!" It's nice to see too how the whole team comes together when that happens. I really enjoy your writing. My vote for the that you've told about the explosion/trap from all the guys' point of view, I don't think it's necessary to do it from Jennifer's view. I think it would flow well to have the next chapter be set at the Passages and expound on each of the guys' reactions while they are waiting to hear on her condition (because you've established in the previous chapters that they all care for her) and then of course have some heart-felt Jon/Jennifer interaction when she wakes up...because I wouldn't think you're killing her off, right? :)
KTarra chapter 4 . 8/13/2011
Did I miss the Captain's POV? Please say there's more! Loved it!
MzSnowleopard chapter 1 . 3/20/2011
very intense. I think the other reviewers said it all- we want more, we want to know what caused this incident.
jhsads chapter 4 . 3/8/2011
Fantastic Story! Please don't stop! I can't wait for your update! I love it!
Windjammers chapter 4 . 2/26/2011
Excellent! Hawk was right - they did have a duty to get the team out of there, but it had to be tearing them up inside that they couldn't tend to Jen right then and there the way they wanted to.

Keep 'em coming!

Just out of curiosity, will we get to see a POV from Blastarr and Soaron?
Windjammers chapter 3 . 12/24/2010
Oh, boy, Scout and Jennifer are buddies - he is NOT going to take what happened to her well. He's blaming himself for not figuring things out sooner.

And the grim thought of what they would do if they lost Jennifer again has to creep into their thoughts when things like this happen. What happened to her and the base must have forced them to re-evaluate everything they took for granted. If one had to die for the others wasn't an academic debate any longer. It was reality. What would happen if something like that was needed again? Or if they lost someone in a battle again?

There's one thing we've never really known. How many of the team can fly the jump ship? We know they can all fly sky bikes (reasonably sure, anyway), but is flying a jump ship as ordinary to them as driving a car is to us? Are they all capable of it but only Hawk and Pilot are the Mario Andrettis of the group?

This story is definitely attention grabbing. :)
Windjammers chapter 2 . 12/24/2010
I just know Tank would rip apart absolutely anything and anyone that hurt Pilot. She can take care of herself, but I always got the feeling that she and Tank had a lot in common in their backgrounds. It bonded them together in a way the others couldn't share.

The idea that Tank sees himself being there for one reason - that is an incredible insight. He proves the complete opposite of everything Dread believes. No matter how Tank got there, he chose the path he walked even though he couldn't choose his past. Still, what he chose to be, what he was designed to be and how he got there walk hand in hand. It's a matter of using those abilities in a way to do good, not the evil Dread wanted.

Also, leaving proof behind that he had been there - that is a great plot bunny to pursue. What does each person leave behind when they're gone? What does each member of the team leave behind?
Windjammers chapter 1 . 11/28/2010
Your muse can't be so cruel as to take off for parts unknown without giving you the next part. It can't be the end for now. This one had me on the edge of my seat!

Whatever your muse wants, tell it we'll get it. Chocolates? Caramels? Three Musketeers bar? Snickers? A puppy? We need the next part. Maybe send it a telegram asking for the next chapter?

This was incredible!
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