|Reviews for Desert Winds of Change|
| Vishisht chapter 27 . 5/28
I've spent two weeks doing nothing but reading your story. IN BETWEEN EXAMS. so I know who I'm going to blame should I fail. It was simply brilliant! Also, I absolutely loved your disclaimers, they're the best I've ever come across, and I could spend many more weeks just reading them. Thanks for the excellent story :D
P. S. I'm going to favourite this as soon as I remember my password :P
| Certifiable Genius chapter 27 . 11/1/2013
... I have no words that quite describe how much I loved this. I, quite frankly, think that any word I DO come up with will put the story to shame by not complimenting it enough. My only regret is that you didn't take it to Shippuden... That would have made my day/week/month/year/decade/life! Maybe you could do a sequel about Shippuden? Please?
| Guest chapter 22 . 6/3/2013
To you, EVERYTHING IS A HORSE!
| Shade40 chapter 27 . 3/10/2013
Seeing as how this story was completed a year and a half ago and also seeing as how you've gotten plenty of reviews already, I'm not going to go all out in commenting on the smaller details. I'll just comment in a broader manner.
This story had things I liked and things I didn't. Giving negatives first, I was hoping for a lot more new material. The large percentage of canon events being described over again - though not really hindering or taking away from the story - made me impatient and didn't add anything for me. Although you showed things from Temari's perspective as a way to mix it up, I don't feel that anything new was revealed by going over canon events again. I respect that you wanted to keep your plot as true to canon as possible and that's all fine and good, but I feel that you could have just had time gaps in the places where you were rehashing events and it wouldn't have made any significant difference to the quality of the plot.
Having said this, in almost every place where you introduced new ideas, I was pleased. There were smaller parts where you added new events that, although not really important, fit in nicely. (I'm thinking specifically of the three Sand ninjas listening in on Shikamaru, Ino, and Chouji in the restaurant when first entering the village.) Such an event isn't much when all is said and done, but it felt natural and was easy to imagine happening and for small additions like that, I feel you did a very good job. I wish there had been many more of such additions. The way you fit them in and made them flow meant that anyone who couldn't remember the anime/manga or hadn't watched it recently might not be certain what was from you and what wasn't, and when a reader says they can't tell what's canon or not, that's always a compliment for the fanfiction writer.
In terms of your larger new ideas (the Sand siblings' early years and throwing down council members in particular), I have no objections to what you portrayed. That said, I also didn't feel strongly that the events would have happened as you portrayed. I would have been more satisfied if something more interesting was put into the in-between times, even if canon-wise such events might not have had any drama. I feel that the timeline perhaps went too quickly, but I'm fairly new to Naruto and I can't be picky about how much time passed between events. I don't feel that it matters too much for this story anyway.
The caring that Temari in particular shows was, in my eyes, a bit too strong especially near the beginning of the story. I wanted to see all three Sand siblings slowly change. I think this was one of the main points for you as a writer: to show how the characters changed from their childhood through to the beginning of Naruto Shippuden. I begrudge how easily Gaara changes from when he's defeated by Naruto to when we next see him saving Lee and this comes because he changes too much and too quickly. My biggest hope when starting to read this story was that you would give events that helped 'ease' Gaara into changing in a less-dramatic way; that you would fill in the gaps so that he doesn't just go from 'evil bad guy' to 'reformed good guy' with no accompanying difficulties in making that change. Change is hard and it doesn't happen overnight. Because I feel that this was your main purpose, I don't think you hit the mark that you wanted to hit. Or you didn't hit it as much as you wanted to. You did a bit to ease the transition, but to really achieve the effect you wanted, I think a lot more needs to be added to the time between Gaara's defeat by Naruto's hands and then their coming to the rescue when Sasuke defects.
In terms of your writing, I have no particular complaints or praise. Errors were few and far between. Sentence structure was good and solid, if tending on the side of caution, and pacing was fine. The only real comment I wanted to make is that I disliked the excessive use of Japanese words. This is just a personal preference thing and I wouldn't expect anyone to change what they've written based on this, but I've always felt that overusing Japanese in English writing is an elitist thing. Some people act proud or better because they prefer the original over the 'dreadful dubs'. Everyone's entitled to their own preferences - I watched the show in Japanese with subtitles and I don't like dubs - but it can ostracize readers who don't understand the words. My rule of thumb is to only use terms that aren't translated in the subtitles themselves. Words like 'baka', 'bakemono', 'sabaku', 'gaki', and 'okaa-san' can all be easily translated into English without losing any meaning. Therefore, the only real reason to keep the phrases was to emphasize that you watched it in Japanese. At the very least, an author's note at the end of each chapter giving the translations would be helpful to your readers.
Anyway, I guess my overall feeling is that I enjoyed the stuff that was new and I wanted even more new stuff.
| woodlandfairykirk chapter 2 . 8/12/2012
I live this, and how you have the household makes sooo much sense! I am about ready to murder the Kazekage though, cause Gaaras just too cute(:
| mistykasumi chapter 27 . 2/16/2012
I really really enjoyed this fic! I loved seeing Temari grow in here, along with her bonds with her siblings. You've done a really great job writing this :)
| mistykasumi chapter 7 . 2/15/2012
I just want to say that so far I'm really enjoying the fic. You've fleshed out Temari so much, and I especially love what you've done in this chapter because yes, Temari does seem like a cold-hearted bitch when we first meet her in the anime, but here you've made what she did fit perfectly with her character. I can't wait to get through the rest of the fic!
| Ascaisil chapter 27 . 2/6/2012
I'm both happy and sad that it's over...but I did think it was a nice touch, having the last chapter be a letter from Matsuri.
And, (or course,) I loved the bit about Gaara being the kazekage so he had to approve of all foreign marriages. :P
Altogether this was an awesome and wonderful story, and I'm still completely jealous of your talent. :P
| Ascaisil chapter 24 . 2/6/2012
Yay! I'm so glad you decided to add them being teachers and Matsuri. I know it was filler, but I thought it was cute, and also a good way to show how Gaara has been changing. You've done a wonderful job with it too. :)
| Ascaisil chapter 23 . 2/6/2012
Okay, I'm not really politically minded, so I admit this didn't all make perfect sense to me, but at the same time it was still intriguing enough for me to TRY and make sense of it. :P
Again, I'm having a hard time finding anything I could criticize, but I did notice that when they were breaking in to the manor you referred to Kankurou as a brunette; which, to my understanding is a term only used for females. I could be wrong, but that's really the best I can do in finding anything wrong. Sorry! xD
Also, this was your First story? I...am so jealous. You are totally awesome, and you shouldn't even think about taking it down because it's great. :)
| Ascaisil chapter 21 . 2/6/2012
rofl at your disclaimer! xD
So, again, I loved seeing the events in the hospital from Temari's pov; especially the comments about falling for a weakling. Ha ha ha! And then when Kankurou showed up I started laughing so hard my hubby had to some see what was wrong with me! xD
I continued to giggle maniacally throughout the rest of the chapter. I liked that they taught at the academy, and thought it was cute how they interacted with the kids. And, (of course,) I got a HUGE kick out of the dinner with Shikamaru's family! :P
| Ascaisil chapter 20 . 2/6/2012
Yay! I LOVED this chapter! :D
Okay first, I thought it was great that you had them stop for both Chouji and Neji; and when Gaara put the sand barrier around Chouji I was like "Aww! Gaara!" /pet, pet, pet
It was a great way to show his "softer" side without making him out of character, and I loved it.
Second, I was wondering how you would get Kankurou there, (given the distance and time it takes to travel,) but as soon as you brought up the reverse summoning it all made sense, and I thought it was a great idea as well.
Third, Shikamaru...aww, adorable Shikamaru. I liked seeing her rescuing him from her point of view, (especially with her feelings of proving herself,) and I got a major kick out of her thinking about being teased for it later too. :P
Altogether I really enjoyed this chapter; just because you're covering canonical events doesn't mean it has to be repetitive, and I think you do an awesome job with that. :)
And also, yes, I am back! I've still got Tales of the Leaves bookmarked at where I stopped and I'm excited to go back to reading it; things got in the way for a while but now I'm back. :D
| Ascaisil chapter 12 . 2/5/2012
Ha ha ha! I loved this chapter! First, I was looking forward to her reaction to Naruto and the nine tails, but you also did a great job with the way Temari was analyzing Shikamaru's attacks. It was very enjoyable to read; even though I knew the outcome I was still on the edge of my seat. :)
| Ascaisil chapter 7 . 2/5/2012
I thought it had been six years since the last time skip? Wouldn't that make Temari 17? I thought you had said she was 11 at the time, but maybe I was mistaken.
Anyways, I enjoyed this chapter as well. The lead up to cannon events were interesting, but I want to see things from her point of view. Like her fight with Shikimaru. :P
Great job so far!
| Ascaisil chapter 3 . 2/5/2012
I'm enjoying this story so far; their interactions are sweet, and I like seeing things from Temari's perspective.
I did notice, while she was serving breakfast you used "than" when it should have been "then." But that's the only thing I saw. I'd LIKE to give constructive criticism, but I'm not finding anything to critique! :P