Reviews for Persona: The Connection
A Jack Frost Guy chapter 10 . 3/11/2013
... Okay, this is certainly quite the history screw-up. Truely. Not that bad though, just screwing up everything I know of the series history-wise.
A Jack Frost Guy chapter 5 . 3/11/2013
OMG... There's plenty to laugh at here. Plenty indeed. Nanako punching Kanji in the face, then pwning Ken in one move, Shinji (however means he survived) and how he went about his business (esp the food critcs part) and Minato's entry... Bwahahahaha!
A Jack Frost Guy chapter 4 . 3/11/2013
Somewhat crudely written, but the characters certainly are in-character.

... That said, I feel like murdering Teddie now. Hands off Fuuka, you freapin' bear!
Overlord Marche chapter 5 . 12/10/2012
Wait, their training Nanako to be Batman? That is the single greatest thing ever, make a fic soley base on that and that alone
Jin chapter 10 . 9/12/2012
Lovers was the 6th. Shinji's persona is castor, not atlas.
AlchemistofSilver chapter 2 . 8/4/2012
Stop bolding and italicizing. It's bad form.
Shikaku Zetsumei chapter 9 . 6/26/2012
I find your summaries, as well as the storytelling, rushed. While it is a personal preference, I do think summaries should be well laid out, rather than thrown purely for the sake of reader understanding. It puts gaps in the storyline and makes it seem forced, almost as if you simply wanted to write the idea down and decided against expanding on these ideas. I would like to see you slow down and organize your thoughts to make the story much more coherent. (If you've done this in later chapters, then keep up the effort)

The concept is interesting, don't get me wrong. That's what drew me to the story in the first place. However, nine chapters in and it's getting a bit hard to read. At points, I am somewhat confused, especially with the timeline you summarized a couple chapters ago. I'll keep reading this to see what the story evolves into, but I can see myself losing interest if the story remains convoluted.

Shikaku Zetsumei
Patcheresu chapter 2 . 6/10/2012
Fuuka had been in the tech club teaching some first years how to jailbreak toasters to play MP3s.

WHAT. Your AN is not a good excuse. To answer why her stuff can work without a complex explanation, generator and over 10 years of science going into bending the paranormal over the Kirijo family's knee. You could at least rephrase it to something like replacing the inner capacity for toasting with an mp3 player and screen. Because otherwise that just threw off the flow of the entire story.

Nevermind that "jailbreak" is a badly used word, the proper term being alter, reinvent, re-engineer, "change _ so that they _", but jailbreak refers to something like letting the user go to lightly toast, medium toast, dark toast, and nuked. Jailbreak being letting the consumer nuke it.

Back to the main point. It's a toaster. Sure, it could play mp3s, but you would need everything an mp3 player needs, a motherboard, rewiring the electricity input and output, and take out everything it doesn't need like heated coils that would break the mp3 part.

Now you could cut alot of trouble out by just making the toaster be a case for something else, take for example the Nintoaster, currently owned by James Rolfe. Yes, I am serious, it is an NES, fully playable, built into a stainless steel toaster. The lever locks the cartridge in, I think.


Yes, what is Yosuke and Teddie's SECONDARY OBJECTIVE. I'm being harsh here, but that was some random emphasis. STEALTH HAD ALWAYS BEEN A WEAKNESS OF AEGIS'S. See how silly I sound?


Besides this, its okay.
ChaosRune chapter 37 . 8/31/2011
Seriously, I did a search across all chapters, and Minato appears till chapter 37? What the hell? Thats not much of a Main Character at all, what a let down
ChaosRune chapter 16 . 8/31/2011
Why the heck does this have Minato as main character? I havent seen hide or hair of him
princesskisara chapter 43 . 5/6/2011
I see, well update soon...
Natzo chapter 42 . 5/3/2011
So, constructive criticism?

At first I felt you rushed the storytelling a bit, but it's working out fine. Though there are things out there that may bother some, like Yukiko using Armageddon and Naoto buffing since their powers don't match their personas, but those can be ignored.

There could be more interaction between Minato and Naoto since they are sibling.

It's nice to see more people incorporating social links into their stories and how people react to them like they are being used.

I suppose Himiko is FeMC right? I'm still used to Hamuko and Minako.

It's coming out nicely, if a little rough around the edges. I'm enjoying the story.
princesskisara chapter 37 . 4/20/2011
i get it know. takaya was the one who had freed adachi from jail and know he get new strega: takaya, adachi, and chidori. i wonder how souji would face this. and i curious about nanako's persona. and i can ├▒ot log in as a member so for a while i review as anonymous. well update soon.
princesskisara chapter 35 . 4/2/2011
I wonder what will happen to nanako... Update soon...
princesskisara chapter 34 . 4/2/2011
Poor junpei...
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