Reviews for Apprentices
Lady Jaye1 chapter 6 . 3/22/2011
Looks like things are heating up, with Firefly and Mindbender wanting DNA samples. The boys are being rather immature and I find myself wanting to smack them around, which is of course why they're on the said camping trip in the first place. ;)

Loved the boy-repelling tent, by the way. I was half expecting Jinx to make the two boys sleep in it and take their tent...and of course, being the sole female, she'd be more irked about the lack of bathroom facilities, even if she is a ninja.
Linuxgirl chapter 6 . 3/22/2011
Tommy really is a badass! Hot pink tent with glitter, fairies and butterflies (blargh). Was it "Hello Kitty" or "Barbie"? Gods, I couldn't have stood that even when I was around eight (pink without anything ok, but the rest :-( ).

And all the other little "roughing it" niceties are also great. Though as a girl I have to say that Jinx is a lousy camper, if she needs a camping toilet. My mom, sister and I never had problems with camping without rest areas.

Love the "masters fighting scene", especially Tommy's groan when Jinx ratted on them. What do we learn from the story more and more: never get on your martial arts masters nerves ;-).

One question though: "I've apparently already started bounding with them more". Can "bound" be used instead of "bond"? I had expected "bond", but I'm not completely sure.

And you made a nice intro for the bad boys: Mindbender and Firefly, whew! That's going to be hot. Love it.
gamingkitty chapter 6 . 3/21/2011
Tommy, I'm disappointed in you. You found a girly tent for Jinx, but put Billy and Kamakura in a plain one? You couldn't stick the two of them in a cartoon tent?

Nice characterization on Stephen Price, he's very believable.

Jinx is overstating things a bit. It's possible for a woman to urinate in the woods without "anointing" her clothing or stripping first. It's more awkward than the male procedure, but I've done it on a college trip to the Boundary Waters. And I'm putting money on Jinx being more flexible than I've _ever_ been.
general zargon chapter 6 . 3/20/2011
LOL! Are you planning to write a story where Storm finds out about Billy being a worm? I find the mental image of a kid!Billy cuddling with Tommy unbelievably cute! :D The idea of Storm being related to Hanzo Hattori is really cool! _ Please keep up the excellent work and update soon!
WestAero13 chapter 6 . 3/20/2011
Yeah! Keep it coming! I can't wait to see what happens during the night...(ex fist fights and more fist fights...)
zenbon zakura chapter 6 . 3/20/2011
which is why i am grateful for modern toilet i cannot imagine squat pooping hwo the hell is it even possible?
CrystalOfEllinon chapter 6 . 3/20/2011
Oh sweet lord.

Mindbender isolating Hanzo's DNA would be...bad. Very, very bad. Unless you WANT an evil brainwashed cloned ninja army murdering you to death.

Silly Mindbender. Of COURSE Firefly knows where you are. That's what Firefly DOES. He finds people. And blows them up.

Apprentices need to toughen up. Snake and Tommy ran LRRP's. You think THEY got hot showers? Silly apprentices.

Threatening a fast to two young men (read; walking stomachs) is cruel brilliance. "Cuddles Tommy" You're such an evil genius sometimes. And, of course, ninja fights and ninja getting smacked upside the head. Always amusing.

Ten trillion points for Hanzo. (the fact that my theory has at least one other supporter makes me a happy geek)
willwrite4fics chapter 6 . 3/20/2011
Ooooo, nicely played for the masters, and seeing threatening Firefly.. who is def over-confident thinking he's going to stroll up and snatch Storm.

Bickering boys. Sounds like a LONG week.
TinySprite chapter 6 . 3/20/2011
Great chapter! Although I get the feeling this is not going to be a simple (by ninja standards) camping trip...
Giant Snapping Turtle chapter 6 . 3/20/2011
Is it creepy that I bounced when I saw the news of the update sitting in my inbox? :3

OOOOOOH MY GOD I love this, I love the teenage boy squabbles, I love Jinx tent (and agree with her on everything. Camping kinda sucks when youre far out, squatting is highly uncomfortable), and I love the fact that Billy is a worm. I can just hear the midnight pillow fights now, although Im sure those pillows will be stuffed with rocks ;)

Oh dear...trouble afoot. I think this will end up working a little too well ;)

and I thought the fact that Kamakura didn't want to laugh at Billy's joke was adorable ;) I've been in situations like that. You know, pride does get in the way of enjoying life.

Loved it! Can't wait for more!
CrystalOfEllinon chapter 5 . 3/7/2011

Sweetness. SOOOO much potential for chaotic violence and gratuitious explosion-backed ninja battles.

And Tommy DOES love him some disguise-fueled mayhem. And he's so danged GOOD at it too. And he KNOWS he's good at it. 3

Also, having SE threaten to duct-tape gag both Billy and Kamakura...and Jinx offer to help. I giggled like a loon.
Ghanie chapter 5 . 3/4/2011
Please continu! :)
Giant Snapping Turtle chapter 5 . 3/3/2011
Oh I love this :3

I really, really love this. I think their childness is adorable ;) although probably not the best attribute when training to be a deadly scary ninja.

I forsee danger in the form of Jim Winslow...and collapsing tents ;)


I put that in CAPS to emphasize my excitement :D
Totenkinder Madchen chapter 5 . 3/3/2011
This keeps getting better and better! The mention of Jim Winslow is promising; if he knows Firefly, it's possible there could be a spoke thrown into the works, and disaster is always entertaining when there are ninjas involved.

I really do like what you're doing with Billy and Kamakura. They've definitely got a territorial thing going, competing for Top Ninja Apprentice, and the little barbs they're shooting back and forth definitely remind me of quarreling brothers. Jinx's reactions are priceless, and Cover Girl . . . well, Cover Girl said what we were all thinking, I believe. Hilarious!
Antigone68104 chapter 5 . 3/3/2011
How ticked is Tommy going to be once he finds out that Winslow saw through his disguise instantly?

I'm also wondering if Billy and Kamakura slept through their English classes. I've known people who had English as a second language who did not have the foot-in-mouth troubles those boys do. Or are they just trying so hard to zing the other that they forget about what other listeners will think?

This is looking good, you're all set for everything to hit the fan.
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