|Reviews for Obliquely Expressive|
| LouiseKurylo chapter 1 . 2/25
Good job of Jane's utter self-deception and the extent to which is hasn't worked. Thanks.
| Lothlorien Aeterna chapter 1 . 9/13/2011
Very sweet ;)
| Anna chapter 1 . 12/19/2010
This is so good!
| forthecoast chapter 1 . 12/17/2010
Yay! You did write post-3x09/10 fic. And in Jane-first-person, too. Which is something I'm not sure I'm brave enough to even TRY to pull off. But this really worked for me. Nicely done.
Quick thing: I noticed a few typos. "Now need to sound so surprised woman," - now should be no, I think? / "I suppose I should all get back to work now." - I'm thinking either the second I should be we, or there should be no all? / And then, Christina Frye should be Kristina. Stupid woman.
Okay, more important things! I particularly liked the section about Jane's thoughts on Hightower and Lisbon. And obviously Jane's musings on Red John and revenge and why he's keeping Lisbon away/going to Minelli/trying to protect her. I'm also a big fan of the quote you used in the beginning and how that colors the fic itself. I like intro quotes/lyrics. Yay.
Also, yay for the "little lady" thoughts. Faaaavorite. I hope he does decorate her office. I've decided that needs to happen.
| Frogster chapter 1 . 12/17/2010
Ooh, so good! Lots of layers to this story, especially nearer the end.
I think, slowly, Jane's total grip on the whole Red John thing-not just that he is supposed to be totally Jane's, but Jane's understanding of it-is slipping. He's coming to an awareness of Lisbon and how much she means to him, but every time something of a softer nature dealing with her pops up, he thinks he has to squash it down. I don't think he realizes that the more cruel he is to her, the more he realizes that's what he's doing, the more he falls for her, bit by bit. And his lines here show that.
Loved their talk at the end-how Jane does things just to make Lisbon smile. He keeps trying to back away, but in the end he can't fully distance himself. :) And when they were talking about Ben and May, well, it seemed like a thin facade for their own "relationship" and their hesitations and concerns for each other. Especially when Lisbon said "Yes heaven forbid that she try to help a man she cares about work through his problems." That was a fantastic line. Here the obsession with Santa seems to be a stand-in for Jane's obsession with Red John (kind of amusing since both are associated with red).
This line struck me: He couldn't see what was real and what was just lies. I think Jane's at that point, or is almost there.
Love how Jane's last few thoughts keep turning to Lisbon, and how he wants to make her smile. Especially considering Jane's musing that Ben would probably do anything just to see May smile. That just makes the final line more poignant.
Amazing job! Lots of things to think about in this one. (I'm an English major, so I can't help it.) Write more soon!
| erica83ca chapter 1 . 12/15/2010
I really liked it - I can only imagine how hard it was to write first person for Jane who is the purest form of an enigma wrapped in a riddle.
I think you captured him well and his... relationship with Lisbon and the very fine line between manipulation and protection (of her and whatever he genuinely feels for her).
Still for all his brave talk about controlling instinctive responses and biofeedback loops he still goes out and buys a wreath for his couch - to make her smile... snerk :-)
Wonderful! If I don't get another chance - have a great Christmas!
| Alamo Girl chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
Oh WOW! Okay, I think I see why this was so hard to write. And not just because my request was a ramble, and then subsequent paragraphs were more of our own brand of ramble. But then, that's how we work, yeah?
First person is HORRENDOUSLY hard to write. At least it is for me. And then getting into the mercurial head of Jane is hard enough as it is. On top of that, you have him delving, and alternately NOT delving into the thinky-thoughts that we love.
And yes, you did so wonderfully. I completely LOVE this. Really.
I love that Jane considers his words to Todd, but doesn't completely admit that he's broken his rule a few time. I also loved the parts where Jane sorta realizes something, and then denies it in the next breath. I don't want to hurt her, but I can't care about such things.
This is SO very much Jane. Also the couch banter. Got to love the couch banter.
The ending is so awesome. Jane's pretty guilty of doing some crazy things to get Lisbon to loosen up too.
Fabulous job, m'dear! I hope I can do you justice with my fic gift!
| MeltedChoccoButton chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
This is really good and i think a very credible assessment of Jane's thought process. I like how u captured Jane's creepily impressive self-control and how it exists side-by-side with his impulsive playfulness. I can imagine his thoughts have that tone of paternal affection for the team that you used so well. Only thing i wasnt keen on was the section where u described desperate people desperate to celbrate. It was a bit repetitive, I think that was style you were going for, but it grated a bit.
| yaba chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
This one was definitely interesting. Usually I'm put off by first person fics, especially ones with Jane, because let's face it, the man's mind can be a total enigma at times. However, this is you writing, so obviously the characterization was near perfection. I could *hear* Jane's voice in my own head (heh), especially how quickly he oscillated between heavier topics and lighter, more entertaining thoughts. I particularly found him jumping from murder and revenge to making Lisbon smile a really authentic thought process for him. I feel like he sometimes has such a high level of acceptance for his plans that they are placed in the same compartment as his lighter thoughts, which is awesome.
I particularly also liked how you used the case in 3.10 to symbolize J/L's relationship, especially Lisbon justifying May's actions while Jane defended Bernard, or more like tried to be realistic. it was pretty awesome. Also Jane's thoughts on VP/Rigs were pretty accurate and overall, this was a great read. I felt like it was a character study almost and I liked how you outlined Jane's thoughts. Definitely a good way to decompress after a final from H-E-L-L.
| xanderseye chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
I really like this fic, it was interesting seeing things from Jane's point of view, I like that he considers Lisbon to be his "potential chosen companion" but is worried that by admitting it or showing her affection would effectively be signing her death warrant, but he appears to be blind to the fact that he is showing affection for her in the way he tries to please her, just little things, but anyone paying attention would notice.
Have you considered doing a 2nd chapter from Lisbons point of view, using the same time line, it would be interesting to see her perspective.
| GhostWriterLost chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
Another stellar job. I like your Jane better than that on the show. I just find TV Jane annoying, at best.
I do rather wonder if anyone sees themselves clearly. [Every time i go out in public, i know people don't see the same thing in the mirror as the rest of the world sees - why else could they wear that stuff?] Jane is no where nearly as opaque as he thinks he is here - at least to Lisbon. And i doubt Lisbon is quite as transparent as Jane pretends. In other words, a perfect couple!
| Jisbon4ever chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
You said to go ahead and get crazy reading btw the lines; so don't blame me. LOL Who is Jane trying to convince, Lisbon or himself? It seems to me that for someone who thinks he has everything under control, he really doesn't. I liked reading his inner debates, but I liked the way Lisbon is pushing back. Jane may think whatever he wants, but his words have double meanings. I enjoyed the talk they shared on his couch. They were so talking about themselves without even saying so. I find it funny how they can both be naive towards their feelings for each other. You did a great job with this one. :-)
| Kuhlama chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
Wow. Very good and Thought-through and funny and really perfect to me :)
I'm going to check your other Mentalist storys now...
| Chicklit chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
I think you've got Jane's inner monologue nailed in this story. The tug of war inside his head is exhausting, and I particularly like his insight into Teresa and how he can't ever let on that she matters. Really well done.
My only feedback is that Boxing Day isn't a holiday in America - It only exists in Britain.
| the-wayward-painter chapter 1 . 12/14/2010
I love how you wrote Jane... especially his own self deception.
I've always wondered what he would do if it came down to the showdown with Red John if Lisbon killed him to save Jane from doing it...