Guest chapter 22 . 3/11/2013
Great story! you really have the characters personality's down, however. . . no offense, but the grammer was horrible. . . i would highly recommend spell check or have someone read it before posting. I just thought it was a shame to be distracted from such a great story by things like missplaced apostropese, and spelling mistakes, it made it really hard to understand some sections of the story. Again, please don't be offended, I think you have a great talent for writing, just work on the grammer and you'll be AMAZING!
Thatonegirlthere chapter 1 . 2/7/2012
Hi :3 love it so far doing a great job and I now how u felt about the putting up a story and not thinking anyone would like it hey I spell the same way :) ok well byeee

WorkingToLive chapter 1 . 10/24/2011
that was amazing! I loved every chapter, and I hope I can go as lon gas you did (22 chapters?) with my story. Thanks for the reivews you leave they mean a TON!
Esther -chan chapter 2 . 8/28/2011
To wife of anonymous: Thank you for your review it means a lot! I know there are some mistakes in this story this was the first time i ever posted in thing and I didn't think any one would like it. My second story call ed ( When the camping trip went to hell) I took my time unlike this one.
wife of anonymous chapter 2 . 8/27/2011
i like the storyline but you should edit it for it lacks proper spelling, grammar, and paragraph spacing. i dont know about other people, but it pisses me off when i read a poorly proofread story. this is not a haters comment, just giving you some pointers so the story can be enjoyed to its full content.

PS i am not even a teacher im 15 so dont treat me like some crazy old lady please
Rose Peddal Kitten chapter 22 . 5/3/2011
That story was EXELINT! You should DEFFINITELY make a part 2! And I can't spell to save my life so please don't bash me about that! Also, please check out my profile! Thanks!
SugarQueens12 chapter 8 . 4/16/2011
(sorry, I'm on my dsi's hard to log in. And I forgot how to EXACTLY spell my name. lol) Nice story, just a few mistakes I want to point out to make it better.

Wants Is that supposed to be ONCE ? I noticed in some sentences where it should have once, it says wants.

Hatrio I think that's how you spelled it.0-0. Anyways, his name is actually spelled Hatori.

Sorry if I sound mean, the story itself was great! But I'm just trying to help.
Alex-Chan 1234 chapter 22 . 4/4/2011
OMG there has to be a part 2 OR ELSE oh um excuse me im acting like kurgura oops :P
Alex-Chan 1234 chapter 11 . 4/3/2011
i love it
Rose Peddal Wolf chapter 2 . 4/2/2011
So far, the story line is great! But it's really hard to read. For grammer, I give you an A for effort, but an F for exaccution. Sorry for rudeness but there is NO nicer way to explain that!
fruitsbasket777 chapter 22 . 4/2/2011
Oh that was a good ending and I loved this story! You put everyone into character. And you became a very AWESOME writer on the way through every chapter. I could tell you were improving very much. But I want to thankyou for putting me in it for a thankyou. I read that and it made my day. But I want to thankyou for writing the last chapter. And keep up the great work! ;)
AmyNChan chapter 22 . 4/1/2011
you're making me blush~! *_*

you did the story yourself, I was just along for the ride. I really enjoyed this story and I hope that I can read more of your great work.

livelovemusic95 chapter 22 . 4/1/2011
thx for a great story!

TheOneWithNoName chapter 1 . 4/1/2011
Only one problem I have with this is spelling and punctuation. Capitals and full stops in this would make this AMAZING! Overall the idea is very good, it's just smaller things that let it down. THIS IS NOT A FLAME, I am just trying to help point you in a direction of improvement :)

fruitsbasket777 chapter 21 . 3/31/2011
This review if for all the reviews you did on my stories. Sooo here we go! You are doing a super job on this story! I am waiting for the next chapter to come out! You are doing a good job so keep up the great work! ;) And your doing a good job put the people into character. ;) KEEP IT UP! :D
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