|Reviews for A Christmas Suprise|
| Guest chapter 1 . 8/24/2014
I liked the story but you gotta make ash more excited to see his friends other than that it seems rushed a bit but I liked it keep up the good work (sorry if this is late lol)
| Guest chapter 1 . 12/20/2013
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/27/2013
now thats the ending i wanted to see
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/19/2012
WTH it is sooo long(sarcastic)
| ArmoredDragonite chapter 1 . 12/27/2010
that was really sweet :D short and sweet i really liked it :D please update a new region anew love soon :)
| Gerbilftw chapter 1 . 12/20/2010
It was a nice one!
But I would like to come with some advices:
1. There's other words than "said" and "asked"; "Stated", "laughed" and "Smirked" is other perfect examples on how you can put it otherwise(since it gets kinda annoying to read it over and over).
2. Don't rush things, this stuff could had been about 2 chapters, everything you actually need to do is to try and describe it a little better.
3. You need commas here and there in the story, not so important, but necessary(if that now makes any sense).
Anyway, it was a nice one! I wish you good luck in your future stories!
| seanzilla115 chapter 1 . 12/20/2010
VERY VERY NICE ADVANCESHIPPING STORY