|Reviews for Stolen Kiss|
| Anni chapter 1 . 12/23/2010
Hardly loquacious you have been busy. Thanks for that.
This story is absolutely wonderful. I am out of words :)
| Lizicia chapter 1 . 12/22/2010
Oh, wow. Blimey, what a great story! I really loved the prompt and how you used it because you could've taken the easy way out and simply given us a stolen kiss but you made it into a great story. I enjoyed the story-teller's bits about the heroine and the sorcerer, giving a nice background to everything that was happening, especially the part about Jane having two conflicting quests. And the Red John plotline was very nicely handled, too, and the ending was just perfect. They probably would live contrarily every after, like you say.
| waterbaby134 chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
Another top-quality one shot from you. I loved the way the story kind of played out like a fairytale. It was a really excellent story. As always, your Jane and Lisbon characterization was spot-on, all the elements of the story, the plot, the characters all fit well together. And I loved the last line. "And they lived contrarily ever after."
In a nutshell, great story, loved it, you're a fabulous writer. Need I say more?
| information specialist chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
This is fabulous! I love fics that play around witht the narrative, and the last line was perfect: contrarily ever after :) the perfect happy ending. Thank you so much for this. It was a fun read.
| chocolatefan chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
This is the perfect fairy tale, The story came to life. You are an amazing writer! I loved the line: "In fact, she was far more likely to save the Prince as well, if he happened to run into a spot of trouble on his quest" yes it is Lisbon's story and she does not need anyone to save her, she will save you! Also the confrontation scene was magical. This is definitely going into my favourites ;) Xx chocolatefan
| jasadin chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
awesome~! loved it so much
| forthecoast chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
Basically, you are magical, k? I'm still basking in the afterglow. It's rather distracting to the other things I'm supposed to be doing right now.
Everything about this is perfect. I have no idea how you took the prompt and turned it into this, but it is seriously awesome. Particularly because you wrote it *for* Chibs. I think I may have been on a fairytale kick recently anyway, and this just worked for me. So well. Especially because Lisbon wasn't a typical princess and instead was an actual heroine, and because Jane (pretty as he may be) was not the Prince Charming. Charming? Yes. Prince, probably not so much. I like him as a sorcerer. AND, I have a particular soft spot for Lisbon making the first move, especially when she pulls one over and has the advantage on Jane. I enjoy that very much.
I love Jane's conflict once his priorities get split. It makes perfect sense that it would happen that way, and you didn't gloss over it. I like that a lot. I also really like your convenient but also unique way of getting rid of Red John (WHY? WHY CAN'T HE BE HIT BY A BUS? WHY?). And sigh, their fight. So real, and also kind of sad. :( Lisbon collapsing on the couch. That image stuck with me. It feels like what I imagine her reaction would be.
A big fan of Lisbon-takes-a-vacation post-RJ, too. I may abuse that trope a bit, but whatever. I like it a lot. I'm glad you used it too.
I'm still pretty :D :D :D from the "How many?" / "All of them." thing. And them living contrarily ever after. Heeeee.
I feel like baking you a pie right now. Would you like apple or chocolate? Those are my specialities :P
| watchyouwalk chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
Oh my fluff. There are so many things to love about this story, seriously.
The fairytale perspective is definitely an original approach, and it worked really well - almost in narration, but still involved in the story, if that even makes sense.
Bonus points on the awesome scale for Lisbon getting her time in the spotlight and being the one to initiate something - that doesn't happen very often in fanfic while still being so perfectly in character like it is here.
It was interesting, the way that Red John was killed this time around. Personally, I've never given any thought to the families of RJ's other victims, but this now seems like a very plausible outcome, and it makes a lot of sense that a scenario like that would really push Jane over the edge.
All of the dialogue was amazing, from their very cute banter in the beginning to the extremely intense (seriously, on the edge of my seat) argument toward the end.
I'm sure you've probably heard this a lot already, but Jane wanting all of Lisbon's kisses? Squee, so cute! And contrarily ever after is just too perfect for them, heh. :D
Awesome, awesome piece! /favorites
| LittleMender chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
I liked both stories told in tandem. My favorite lines:
"...he knew exactly how warm she'd be in his arms. It made him so tired of being cold."
And this whole exchange:
"'How many are you asking for then?' she asked, resting her hands on his shoulders for support.
'First of all, I'm not asking,' he assured her. 'You didn't ask for yours.'
'How many?' she gasped as she felt his nose trail along her neck. She arched back and it was followed by his lips.
'All of them', he whispered, before claiming his prize.
I can almost hear the predatory note in his voice. Thanks for such an enjoyable read!
| Jisbon4ever chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
That was beautifully written. I have to say this has got to be my favorite story from you yet. :D It has it all. What I most liked about it was that Lisbon had the advantage in the beginning. I love when she gets one over Jane. He can be suck a jerk but we love him too. Loved the kisses and the fight. You always know how to write their relationshing while staying IC. Seriously, I love your writing.
| yaba chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
OMG this was so lovely. I cannot express to you in words how amazing this one shot was. I absolutely loved it! I think it was creative with your own brand of fairytale and real life interwoven so perfectly together, I cannot stop grinning. Seriously, this was sweet and real and just wonderful all wrapped into one and it has the potential to infuse even the most unsentimental person with warm and fuzzy feelings. It certainly made me smile like an idiot (though I am easy to please in that department ;)).
First off, I'd just like to say that the mark of a good writer is knowing one's audience and o my gosh do you know! Chibi probably loved this SO much, which is awesome since it is her gift. This was doubly lovely, because you made changes to the "fairytale" part of it to fit the characters, especially destroying the boy saves girl troupe from the very beginning of the narrative. That was probably what reeled me in right away. Add to that, their lovely banter and Jane's somehow misguided thoughts and you have yourself a winner, dear. Also, I think the plot here, the whole "stolen kiss/theft" idea is absolutely fascinating and worked well with the theme of the story. The only real gripe I had is with Jane deciding to leave and come back again, it's quite annoying when he disappears, but in this paricular story it worked, so Kudos to you for knowing when to put something like that in, and when to keep it out. I especially found the last part very sexy and sweet and I like how you ended it with the fairytale part.
My favorite lines in the whole oneshot were definitely the ones below, because they just describe perfectly J/L's relationship both inside this story and in canon, if it ever happens :).
It would seem our heroine had her own particular brand of magic, one her sorcerer was ill-equipped to deal with.
Because somehow she'd stolen more than a single kiss.
P.S. The song "Stolen" by Dashboard Confessional was totally playing in my head as I read this ;)
THIS IS SOO GOING ON MY FAVORITES LIST :P, because everyone needs a great Xmas story on their rec list :).
| Afterglow04 chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
This is beyond amazing. How you even managed to come up with ALL of this, after receiving a prompt like "stolen kiss" leaves me in awe. I absolutely love what you did with this prompt, it could not have been interpreted in a more perfect way. The fact that one stolen kiss ultimately led to Jane being saved from his own stupid ways. Thank God you're writing romance :D
My eyebrows shot up when I read the beginning and saw you were writing it as a fairy tale, but it works wonderfully well. And I'm a sucker for fairy tales.
I like that he's torn between Lisbon and Red John, since that's how I always like to think of it when writing Jane in fic. If there's ever anything that can come between him and his insane quest for vengeance, it is most definitely her. And the way you approached it here, how you showed us his growing dilemma, left me smiling.
And, you've managed to kill off Red John quite easily once again. In quite an original way, too, might I add. I am jealous.
I really, really loved how you described him suddenly noticing different things about her. It was very in character without even being the least bit cheesy or cliché. It was all kinds of perfect.
"He didn't have a white horse to ride up on, he wasn't pure and good and noble, he wasn't… alright, he was incredibly handsome." LOL. Hands down, funniest line of the story haha!
"No matter how long she'd been considering Patrick Jane's skills in that particular area..." HEE. I don't blame you, Lisbon.
Dear God, their entire fight nearly had me gasping for air.
That was so incredibly well-written, the whole of this was.
Thank you for a great read!
| Arcadya chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
This is so freaking cute!
But totally believable...
I love that Jane gets angry at her for 'ruining' his chances of killing Red John. Especially the reason for it too!
This was great, loved it.
| Chiisana Minako chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
OMG, I don't even know how to begin this. For one, this was loooong. I'm a BIG FAN of that. Especially if the story is awesome! -which it absolutely was, if you had any doubt.
The format you used was super original and delightful, not to mention slightly sarcastic and parody-like. And the descriptions of our main characters? Spot on. I was grinning from minute one, because dammit this is HER story and Lisbon just RULES DA UNIVERSE.
Bonus points for this being a party on her (and Cho's) behalf. I think that's the first time I've ever read that, and they certainly deserve some more attention. The both of them could be King and Queen Tackling -which I admit, is the way I imagine them preventing the murder of the major. And some super ass-kicking as well.
"In fact, she was far more likely to save the Prince as well, if he happened to run into a spot of trouble on his quest."
OMG, YES. You read my mind. How many times has she saved his ass in canon already xD?
""He's upstairs," her subordinate informed her slyly.
"Who is?" Lisbon asked innocently."
Heeeee. Aah, denial, me loves Especially if it's got company :p and well in this case, Van Pelt's push. Without her this whole story might have turned out differently~ *Suddenly has a flashback of The Butterly Effect*
When the fairytale-like story signaled Lisbon's time to shine and change history forever, I swear I got just a little bit nervous. And anxious. And wanting to read. And OMG, I was so curious how it'd all happen. When he started being a major pain in the ass, I thought she might either hit him or kiss him to shut him up. I was silently hoping it was the latter.
Oh, and it was
HEE! You totally should involve more kissing into your stories ;p. I like -scratch that- LOVE how you write it. It's not too descriptive but not so simple either. It's got a very good balance on making the reader giddy, eager to read and get some butterflies flying around.
All that, and he barely got to answer it.
Lisbon winning an 'argument'? ABSOLUTELY FREAKING RULES.
You took the Stolen Kiss concept and developed it into a whole new level; in importance, in what it really meant for someone -aka Jane- and.. and.. *bounces* yeah. I'm feeling so articulate right now :p (And happy you loved my prompt )
I am so tempted of drawing Jane as a sorcerer right now. Although Lisbon is the heroine, what would her costume be? IF she was a princess, she'd be a warrior princess :p a kickass one. Hm. I'll have to ponder on that one.
Aaanyway, back to the story!
The changes in him noticing her were subtle, in a way. As you said, it's not like he had never been paying attention before. After the stealing, it was just *another* kind of attention. UST, anyone?
"Because somehow she'd stolen more than a single kiss."
I can't tell you how much that phrase makes me swoon *3*.
Jane wanting to play Lisbon while Lisbon knew it and used it to play him... *grins* I just.. can't help myself. I might be super biased, but I am SO on Lisbon's side. Mwa-ha-ha.
The confrontational part was so intense I couldn't stop to pick up a line to quote later. I can totally see Jane using some kind of twisted logic -that we do get thanks to the fairytale-y thingy in italics, but Lisbon doesn't know that- to blame it on her, where she didn't even *actively* had nothing to do with Red John's death (also: something I had never read :P someone beating Jane to the punch, AND being a fellow widower).
He definitely needed some time down to think, alone and away from everyone after such conflicting events. I kinda knew you wouldn't make everything be okay right away, but I'm still glad you did give him his much needed time to mull things over.
"Which meant that it was the perfect time for a mysterious knock on her front door."
Aah, the sarcasm Ilu.
Then? OMG, bring it on! :P I've said it before and I'll say it again.. you're the UST queen. You just do it so well
"You want... You want a kiss?" Lisbon asked, resisting the urge to lick her lips.
"*A* kiss?" he asked, against her ear, clearly scandalized by the idea.
"How many?" she gasped as she felt his nose trail along her neck. She arched back and it was followed by his lips.
"All of them," he whispered, before claiming his prize.
Definitely, one of my favorite parts of this. I'd say THE favorite, but it's seriously too damn hard to pick. The imagery was so good all through this! I could practically picture stuff happening, and I'm always a fan of subtle, well-written pass of time. Oh, and romance. Like I needed to say that, right :P?
"And they lived contrarily ever after."
You just couldn't help yourself, could you? I actually chuckled at this one xD.
Summing up -ahem- this was such a perfect gift for me :)! I love romance. I love how YOU write romance. And UST. And our heroine and sorcerer. And narrate just with the right hint of sarcasm -or my kind of sarcasm, anyway :P, because I've found that sometimes it's rather annoying- and refreshing originality.
Did I mention I just LOVED this?
Maybe this will send the message then ;)
*Adds to favorites*
| In The Name chapter 1 . 12/21/2010
Oh I absolutely loved this story! What a great, unique idea. Wow. Great job! I really liked how you wrote it with the narrative bits in there. I'm going to read it again now :p Happy holidays.