|Reviews for King of the Palace|
| Qana Luella chapter 12 . 3/1/2017
I really wish you would finish this story. Very well written and very exciting!
| Long Live BRUCAS chapter 12 . 2/23/2015
UGh So Lauren is bad. And Tom was her step brother. So she is just using Steve and Danny. I hope the Governor isn't in on this. She seemed a bit off and not to concerned.
Off to read the squeal.
| thewarpedmind1 chapter 12 . 6/25/2014
WOW! That was Epic!
| R.U. Lisnin chapter 4 . 12/5/2012
Really good so far! One thing though didn't nick Taylor call steve " smooth dog" and not "slum dog"... That's what I heard... But oh well.. Awesome so far can't wait to read more!
| Crystal Marionette chapter 12 . 4/16/2012
I just wanted to say that I absolutely loved this story! I was reading on my phone and couldn't review that way. I am a huge Danno fan, and thus, Danny whumpage. Cannot wait to read more of your work!
| JMSL chapter 1 . 1/24/2012
Please, please give us more! You can't leave us hanging! This is too good! Thanks, Judy
| ladylockern chapter 12 . 11/23/2011
PLEASE DO NOT LEAVE US THERE this story is amazing and so unfinished it hurts to think thats it please tell me there is a sequale.
| sparra-music chapter 12 . 5/17/2011
Why is this marked complete with a cliffhanger like that?
And when do you anticipate posting a chapter 13?
And please, Please, PLEASE tell me you do intend to have the evil liason come after the guys. Unsuccessfully, of course. And Steve to get the bad guys. And Danny to convince him to let him help. And maybe have a team trip to the mainland, preferably a big city, so that Danny's skill set gets a really good chance to shine.
| vampyfreak chapter 12 . 3/26/2011
Really awesome fic, can't wait to start the next part!
| lynnrxgal chapter 1 . 2/25/2011
I'm a little late to the party here but am really enjoying your story.
Do you mind if I offer a few punctuation, capitalization and grammar suggestions? These are in order in your first chapter.
he did, after all.
charges of which
As an outstanding
had to suffer, so be it.
or worse, destroy
intense, as if someone
man growled, refusing
say "rank" and "sailor"
droned replace with intoned
Bull Frog, would you
lower lip to keep (remove comma)
but rather to annoy
not puke (remove comma)
I will not puke, he repeated himself, commanding
Doherty, hissed twisting
what you want!" he yelled
Danny's pocket, pulling out his phone.
If he were, Danny (subjective tense)
"DANNO" flashed the screen of the EVO, displaying
A puzzled look crossed spread over
DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT DO ANYTHING
than done; you aren't
bag, none of
After donning Kevlar,
offices. A team of
was dark and, with the exception of Danny's office, everything
Steve told Kono (replace "told" with ordered or commanded)
the light revealed that office had been
Steve told Chin, noting that the worktop
to do, boss
"Serial killer?" Chin
bad," Steve replied.
trained on the intruder as Steve
"ARRGH!" Danny let
tearing of the flesh, he just wanted
| CMHowe chapter 1 . 2/16/2011
I don't remember the older version of this, but I loved the original series. Danny was my favorite even back then.
Just wanted to let you know that I LOVE the following from your story:
"Me?" Cough, Cough, Cough. "I'm just peachy. In fact, I'm here at the Palace spilling my guts with a buddy of yours. Say's his name is Mad Man."
Mad Man? Steve froze. Instantly, he knew Danny wasn't kidding when he said he was spilling his guts. Mad Man had been the type of SEAL who liked to torture first and ask questions later. And if Danny was with him it stood to reason that Mad Man would use him as a human filet for whatever reason or maybe no reason all at.
| angelofjoy chapter 12 . 2/13/2011
This story was UNBELIEVABLE! I loved it, you had me hooked from the get go. I loved the characterization, they were wonderful and yet you gave them your own twist and it added to the characters. Great Job!
| star trek nutcase chapter 12 . 2/8/2011
I really enjoyed this. The plot & characterizations were very good. I'm disappointed about the ending requiring a sequel, I would have preferred a conclusion or a warning at start of Chapter 1 that the story is not in fact complete. But that's just me, I chose to not read incomplete stories. But to be honest I have to admit I'm glad I read this and will look forward to the sequel. BTW, the text could use better proofreading as there were quite a few misspellings, missing punctuation, etc. which because they cause a glitch in one's reading tend to be frustrating after awhile. Fortunately, the plot was superb and made these mistakes mostly ignorable.
| ackeberlynn chapter 12 . 1/30/2011
Omg - I KNEW something was askew with that Lauren! You sucked me into this story - with Danny on the mend and Steve mentally compromised (for lack of a better phrase) - how are they going to get through this one? Can't wait to read more!
| MoonArrow chapter 1 . 1/26/2011
Interesting. Looking forward to sequel.