Reviews for Project H: New Moon
TheWitchOfTheSouth chapter 4 . 2/6/2011
This was a great chapter! I loved always all of it. Favorite, favorite quotes are – (first, the whole first part with Bella/Jacob)

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Bella: Say, that's a lovely wreath you've got there saying 'RIP Bella Swan'. But my birthday was weeks ago

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Jacob: *Answers* No, Charlie's at the funeral. The funeral for the person he loves very much, is very clumsy, has magnificent breasts and likes sleeping with vampires *Hangs up*. I hope it was clear I meant Harry Clearwater

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Bella: And you said you'd never leave me, but you still did

Jacob: Yes, but when I lie its cute

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Bella: *Buckles up* There. You can go now

Imaginary Ed: Yeah right. We're in Italy, there's probably mafia everywhere

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Alice: A wet young woman in a low-cut top running up and down without proper upper-body support? The shops will be closed for a week

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Edward: Again, close enough. I just couldn't stand to live in a world without you, even though I did exactly that for 109 years. Essentially I wanted to kill myself because I dated you. All of this is your fault, and it just makes me love you more

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Edward: And that's where you've been wrong all along. This relationship wasn't built on trust, it was built on lies.
Nymphadora1506 chapter 3 . 1/26/2011
This is absolutely amazing! Ahahahah...keep up the good work! :D
Hikari no Kishi chapter 3 . 1/24/2011
*The Meadow, which is now dead. Well maybe if Bella and Edward hadn't laid down on every square inch of it there would be a few flowers left*

Hehe, that was priceless. A very well written chapter. I enjoyed the sheer mockery. And the wolfpack jokes with the baby oil just made this chapter absolutely briliant!
Simply Ginger F.U.F.F.N chapter 3 . 1/24/2011
Imaginary Ed: Threaten him

Bella:...I know karate

Imaginary Ed: You're on your own *Disappears*

and

Bella: Edward's a vampire, Jessica is incestuous, Charlie likes it rough. There, everyone's secrets. Now tell me yours

were the best lines of this chapter. I'm laughing so hard I can't finish my work. Thanks for the much needed laugh.
Simply Ginger F.U.F.F.N chapter 2 . 1/24/2011
"Jacob's shirt: *Will never be seen again*" I love this story. This is awesome.
Simply Ginger F.U.F.F.N chapter 1 . 1/24/2011
THIS. IS. AWESOME. I am heading off to read more. Did you mean for this chapter to be centered?
SargentAngua chapter 3 . 1/23/2011
:D nothing but praise, the highest of praise, borderline worship.
TheWitchOfTheSouth chapter 3 . 1/23/2011
Laurent: I'm here as a favour to Victoria. She thought I owed her one since I gave information to the Cullens that directly lead to the vicious murder of her mate, James. I mean, get over it already. She wanted to know if you were still under the protection of the Cullens

Imaginary Ed: Threaten him

Bella:...I know karate

Imaginary Ed: You're on your own *Disappears*

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Laurent: *Runs, attacks, dies. In that order*

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Jacob: *Jumps through window*

Bella: Well it seems neither the dream catcher nor the pervert catcher is working

Jacob: Hello Bella. I decided to come into your bedroom half-naked and wet in the middle of the night to assure you I haven't become weird

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Jacob: This isn't like getting a girl pregnant, I can't just run away from it. Just try to remember what I told you before. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to join my pack so we can sleep naked together in the woods
CocoRocks chapter 3 . 1/23/2011
Great chapter once again.
Ryo Nightray chapter 3 . 1/23/2011
You, my friend, are a legend!

This was awesome beyond words!
Hikari no Kishi chapter 2 . 1/13/2011
Now, if Jessica was anything like this in the movies, I might have enjoyed myself more!

Bella: The love interests are cousins

Jessica: WHY WERE WE NOT IN LINE OPENING NIGHT?

Had me in stitches, I was laughing so hard! A very well done chapter, and I liked the Bella and Jacob scenes, because of how well it really did paroday the movie!
CocoRocks chapter 2 . 1/9/2011
oh my goodness. What a funny chapter.
Ryo Nightray chapter 2 . 1/9/2011
Funniest. Parody. Chapter. EVER!

Seriously, this is probably the best chapter you'vr written of anything so far :)
the-cereal-killer22 chapter 1 . 1/5/2011
Please continue it soon, i have always loved parodays.
EverlastingTopaz chapter 1 . 12/30/2010
Hahaha. Really funny so far. Your Twilight parody was absolutley hysterical, and I'm sure that this one will be even better :) Great job.
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