|Reviews for Precocious Crush|
| Jellolina chapter 2 . 23h ago
You won me over with your second to last sentence!
| Aronim chapter 192 . 3/12
Good chapter. Once again. To no surprise whatsoever. Great job.
"So close he had to put his arm behind me to si comfortably." That should be "sit" I guess?
"started chocking him" Don't you mean "choking"? That's the strangling thing, chocking is, well, I don't know what it is.
Third, even with Mindy going at Dave, I doubt anyone would just take that abuse lightly, particularly Dave. And not for a whole minute, that is a looooong time to be choked. I'm guessing it was supposed to be more light-hearted, or at least I hope so, but it comes across as serious abuse, not slightly too violent roughhousing. And Mindy doesn't seem that sociopathic to her loved ones.
There was one more grammar thing, but I can't find it now, so I can't quote it. It was minor anyway.
| IWishIHadWeasleyHair chapter 192 . 3/11
Let her kiss you you twit! Let her do it! Introduce Riley to somebody nice, and LET HER KISS YOU YOU TWIT! xD oh why must you do this to me author? Dave pushing her away TWICE in one chapter? That's downright cruelty! Oh why couldn't he just LET IT HAPPEN?! How you tease me;D
A-hem, loved the rest of this chapter:) Mindy's reaction to Riley finding out about costume was hilarious! I'm glad there was more Dave in this chapter (even with his annoyingly fast reaction times;))
| Hickabickaboo chapter 192 . 3/11
I actually thought that the description of Riley "de-masking" Dave was pretty realistic. Doesn't change the fact he got sloppy though.
| Hickabickaboo chapter 191 . 3/11
I know Chris is whack, but he does get kudos for sticking to the whole "drawn-out superhero execution" shtick.
| skywiseskychan chapter 192 . 3/10
Nice chapter. Poor frustraighted Mindy. She appears to have reached the trying so hard stage and if it were the type of thing one might write about in their 'journal' I would imagine it would have reams of her masterabatory fantasies by this point.
I also feel bad for Marcus. Because he keeps seeing things with complete signal crosses. I mean honestly, it's got to be nerve wracking on top of the crime fighting thing. Wondering if tonights the night that they become intimate and it ruins everything, and that he's then got to make up his mind about liking Dave or hating him.
As for Riley, it should take about 5 minutes to realize who Mindy is. So I'm actually pretty surprised that she didn't demand to be in on that conversation. She should realize that just as much as Riley.
| Mr. Atrocious chapter 192 . 3/10
This was a sweet, interesting little chapter. It was a decent length, it was nice and mushy without overdoing it, great dialogue, I liked it. :)
| KrRcksMySx chapter 192 . 3/10
Wow, I read this the day you posted it, but I'm just now getting around to reviewing it lol. Anyway, I liked the chapter. I figured Dave wouldn't shed light no much of what happened, but it's nice he's trying lol. Also, I knew it was going to be soon when Riley found out about Dave.
I'm interested to see what Mindy does to get the new facility/headquarters lol. And I understand Dave not wanting to have Mindy kiss him, but still... Sucks for Mindy.
| Lumias chapter 192 . 3/10
Their secret is not much of a secret these days. I want to see the next interaction between Riley and Mindy now.
Glad you gave us some background on what happened off screen. Though I get the feeling Dave is holding something back.
| Stygian Styx chapter 192 . 3/9
Nice chapter, though the amnesia is concerning. The notebooks were a nice touch.
| The Dark Eccentric chapter 192 . 3/9
Good chapter. I like these ones with just Dave and Mindy hanging out. They have good dynamic.
As for Riley finding out, matter of time I suppose.
Also, glad for the expansion on what happened to Mindy. Its about what I expected, but I get the feeling Dave is hiding something.
| Reader76 chapter 192 . 3/9
It's great to have two chapters in a row updated so quickly! I really like these fluffy and cute chapters in which the special bond between these two crazy kids (well, I know Dave is more like a young man, but still...) is shown. This new dynamic between them with Mindy trying to make a move on him and Dave almost amusingly rejecting them seems to be working for them, and it's probably much healthier for her than having those feelings bottled up.
The poor-detailed description of Mindy's rescue that Dave gave makes me think that he's hiding something. Maybe the terrifying experience of finding Mindy almost dead has made him change some of his views about her. I wonder If we'll get to read a more detailed recount of this event in "Only Her"; that must've been a hell of a rescue, with Dave storming in alone, kicking asses (probably shooting a gun?) and finding an agonizing Mindy.
Marcus' last line was hilarious, btw.
| 2wingo chapter 192 . 3/9
And once again Mindy tries, and fails, in her increasingly bold attempts to get a dose of Vitamin D. Seriously, I'm half expecting Mindy to actually type out a list entitled "Reasons You Should Be Dating Me And Not Miss Knockers McMelons" for him at some point.
Dave's reticence to talk about the parts of the night Mindy doesn't remember is intriguing, to say the least. I'd wager it's because he had to kill a few people to get Mindy out of there and he's still not comfortable doing that even when it's necessary. Or, maybe he's ashamed that he DIDN'T do it by himself, and he actually had help from . . . *drumroll* . . . Katie!
(Side note: It's kind of funny that, in the PC universe, Riley almost got an audition to be a Victoria's Secret model, while Lyndsy Fonseca, Katie's actress, has posed for Maxim.)
Also, Mindy's condition doesn't seem typical for victims of Carbon Monoxide poisoning. CO only has a half-life of about 80 minutes when it's treated with pure oxygen, so it must have all been flushed out of her system by now, and she wouldn't have been able to even leave the hospital in the first place if she suffered from the more serious side-effects like seizures, hypotension, cardiac abnormalities, pulmonary edema, or metabolic acidosis.
And no, I have not forgotten about my own stories, nor our bet (that you've won), I've just been dealing with a metric fuck-ton of steaming horse-crap and haven't had any time to write lately.
| Ballz2walls chapter 192 . 3/8
Wow fast update. I really love the scenes where it's just Mindy and Dave they have a special relationship that always makes me smile when I read it. I worry about the gaps in Mindys memory and how Dave seems to me to be holding back about it. Figured it wouldn't be long till Riley found out I loved Mindys reaction though. Keep up the great work!
| WhiteTigerLilly chapter 192 . 3/8
Best way to end a long day. *Sigh.* I'm glad you posted this so quickly.
Works out pretty perfectly for something you just typed out.
All those attempts at kisses. LOL! VM came to mind. Something about ignoring her and then finally not. Kinda makes me wanna reread but I'm drained.
Talking about Riley, took me back to Katie. We know she's looking for a place to train her but what's going on in the meantime?
So her birthday just passed... 14? Big year?
Ok, need sleep! GN If you see this now and GM if you see this later!