|Reviews for An Interrupted Monologue|
| Avengers4EVER chapter 1 . 2/14
This is really sweet!
| Kerrald x chapter 1 . 1/15
N'awww that was cute :D
| Born-Of-Elven-Blood chapter 1 . 8/15/2012
This made me cry! (in a great way). I love it! I loved being in Snape's head, the way you characterized him was spot on; I loved the way the surprise party was written, the reaction seemed just right for the situation. I love the way Snape sort of eased into falling in love with Hermione. I absolutely loved the last scene in his office, listening to the inner monologue as he was talking to her. This is just the best fic I've read in a long time, thanks so much for writing it! D
| excessivelyperky chapter 1 . 7/30/2012
Lovely! And yes, Hermione would be the first to see Snape as a person; even Lily saw him as a stepping stone more than anything else.
Happy Birthday, Severus!
| Aletto chapter 1 . 7/7/2012
I absolutely loved it form the first word to the very last one! amazing, really! :)
| BetteNoire chapter 1 . 4/30/2012
The vocabulary was most definitely Snape-like and I am envious.
| Severus Snape's Beloved chapter 1 . 3/12/2012
This is a fabulous story, a lovely story.
I love how it captures his personality so perfectly.
| tenoh27 chapter 1 . 9/18/2011
An amazingly humourous and sweet story. Thank you very much!
| cabepfir chapter 1 . 7/13/2011
This brought tears to my eyes. I love first-person stories from Snape's POV and this one had just the right tone between self-restraint of feelings and a deep, streaming flow of the same feelings. I loved the hesitations, the corrections, the fact that Hermione speaks freely about Eileen and about Lily, to boot. I loved that the new password was Giudecca and that Hermione evidently knew it without asking. I loved many wordplays and I loved the simplicity of this:
"You didn't come to dinner."
"No, I didn't."
"And you're here."
So thank you, truly.
| ofankoma chapter 1 . 6/12/2011
What a delight this story is!
Your use of quirky, colorful, expressive language is spot on:
- "Bedlam, that's what! I refuse to give the keys of the asylum to the committed!"
- "the sad day I had the misfortune to be jolted into this world"
- "ensuing decrepitude"
- "...the girl has proved, and I assure you, I am sickened by the poetics of which I am about to spew, a ray of sunshine in a rather gloomy climate..."
- really... I could go on and on with this list...
Also, there's such a playful meandering of thought from topic to topic, abruptly breaking off when Severus realizes he's going astray and forces himself back on his earlier thoughts. And abrupt interjections and repetitions - I don't often care for first person perspective, but this is so effectively written.
So effective that when we get to "You've a bit of egg on your face, Miss Granger, allow me to lick you clean..." it's quite palpable, our poor hero's longing for our heroine.
Ach! "Perhaps you had an abundance of essays to grade, a deadline for one of the journals to which you submit your writings, or perhaps you are, as I walk this seemingly endless corridor, firmly ensconced underneath a young, panting wizard with a straight nose and bulging biceps. I suppose it would make no difference." But it DOES make a difference to you, Severus, doesn't it? Either of the two former options is infinitely preferable to the third, eh?
- - - - - - - - - -
And when our heroine arrives to interrupt... ah, delightful. To be known and accepted, known and safe... with people in our lives. Is there anything lovelier? So often we only get one or the other, and the anxiety and fear that accompany relationships in which we're uncertain we have both of those... well, they're just part of the awkwardness of this life, aren't they? It's clear here that both our hero and heroine have (in such a short word count!) let one another know that they know and trust one another. That being said, this could easily have veered off into overt sentimentality and lost the classic Snape bite - but you've kept the tone just right.
|Alexa1993 chapter 1 . 3/23/2011|
| ousia chapter 1 . 3/21/2011
Great one-shot! It's really really well written. A bit fluffy at the end, but that doesn't really matter. The best part were the spontaneous thoughts of Snape... I liked those a lot! Thanks for writing!
| coffeeonthepatio chapter 1 . 1/23/2011
So, here the promised review. First of all, let me say that this story has some of the best lines I have read in a very long time. The entire story, with his absolute devoted being in love, is just brilliant. Actually, I love stories written in the first person singular. It's especially hard with Severus but if it's well done (and you topped that with this story) it's the most enjoyable thng ever!
Alright, so I'll begin...
I agree with his view on birthdays. I've never seen mine as something that needed to be celebrated but unfortunately, I've been forced year after year by birthday-fetishists. So, I feel his pain.
And yet, despite the sea of mediocrity in which these precious treasures swim
**brilliant line. How did you come up with it? The juxtaposition of mediocrity and precious treasures is just...super!
I refuse to give the keys of the asylum to the committed
**and another super line.
When I was a child, my… my mother… might have found the means to give me a sweet of some sort
**you see, I read literature and literary science at Uni. I am a weirdo wehn I read, just because I can read past the obvious what's written there. And this little hesitation - it says much more than just hesitation. There is so much emotion in those three little dots there that it's practically an entire story to themselves. Amazing!
She hasn't offered me much more than pitiful glances and solemn apologies since… well, since things changed
**she would, wouldn't she? And Severus would find it tiresome. Caught it well. And again, the entire story in three little dots. I'm sorry. I always get excited when I find a story which doesn't explicitly state EVERY BLOODY FACT! Sorry, that's just me.
Oh, and accept it I did, to spite them
**ha! That's the Snapey I love!
As the Muggle youth say, maybe I'll "get wasted" on some kind of alcohol; a bit of old port might be nice. Yes, I think I'll hunker down in my worn leather wingback with a snifter full and drink myself into blissful oblivion.
**my favourite way of celebrating my birthday. Cheers Sev!
He did, if nothing else, usually provide dinner and a show.
I assure you, I am sickened by the poetics of which I am about to spew, a ray of sunshine in a rather gloomy climate.
**that is so him. He's madly in love but he still is Severus and perhaps a little disgusted by whathe thinks about Hermione. Lovely and so in character!
In fact, I find myself searching for it much more often that I should. I have found I have a tendency to burn if left to linger in it for too long
**nice mixing of metaphors that fit. Yay for you!
**do you use Hinterland in English? I didn't know that...
What spawned this terrible lo… fondness was a thought,
**awww, there we go with the three dots again. Not an entire story there but that is rather inability to admit his own feelings fully.
You've a bit of egg on your face Miss Granger, allow me to lick you clean...
My heart however leapt into my throat and attempted to beat its way out of my mouth along with the contents of my stomach
**oh no, he's absolutely smitten. Of course he would think it's illness. I suppose his love for St Lily has never felt this way.
but I can't tell you how many times her hand has managed to find its way to… shall we say the crown jewels of the Prince?
**oh my! crown jewels of the Prince! I'm jealous of those word games.
We talk quite a lot actually, but what is best is that she listens
**how uncommon that a man would be drawn to a woman who listens. ;)
interaction on my terms that is. At least at that time, now, I would follow her to the ends of the earth, Hell and back, on any terms I might be so favoured to be granted
**oh no, he thinks it's hopeless. Idiot man.
And now I'll stop this vomitus spewing of flowery sentimentality for the fear that I might choke on my own saccharinity.
Yes Minerva, thank you. I'm glad I'm here to celebrate as well. Yes, every year is a good one. Yes, tears, wonderful.
**oh no and sans Hermione as well? Whoever will he cope? Poor bloke.
The box however will come in handy later tonight when I carve out my heart. It will make for it a suitable coffin for the useless organ.
**ah yes, he would want to cut it out, especially as he thought it non-existent a few months ago...
or perhaps you are, as I walk this seemingly endless corridor, firmly ensconced underneath a young, panting wizard with a straight nose and bulging biceps
**my poor Severus. Always thinking so low of himself. Someone has to work on his self-esteem when it comes to personal matters.
Hermione... oh gods, my heart.
**that line broke my own heart.
I love you. It, I mean... I'll love it.
**and that crack is my heart again
"NO! No... Hermione, don't go. Please, you misunderstand. This gift is... it's remarkable. My mother! I've never seen this picture before. Hermione, how did you find this?"
**oh my. oh my. if I were prone to crying, I would.
And you... I know that you love me Severus Snape. I know you. I know you."
**and being ashamed to love (on a side note, yep, I would be too) poor Severus. But he's expecting to have his heart trampled on now, right? Being laughed at - and that, he won't survive.
Yes, you, you are forthright... but, Hermione, you, you have withheld if you... What I mean, is do you? Oh Merlin's tits! Just tell me woman! Hermione, do you love me? Please, just tell me. I think I'll go mad from not knowing any longer... the way you talk."
**oh, he dares to ask.
So, you'll just have to give it to me so that I can care for it properly. It hasn't been loved back for a long time you see, and that's just no good. I've got quite a bit of love for that heart of yours, and more for the rest of you.
**that's one of the most romantic things I've ever read. Thank you!
Thank you so much for this story. Thank you!
| shemerina chapter 1 . 1/15/2011
AWWWWWW excelent one shot for Severus' birthday! 3333
I loved the way you wrote Snape's thoughts and the way you led this story flow. Thanks for sharing it with us :)
| Hannah-1888 chapter 1 . 1/13/2011
I thought this was a really great story. There were many things I liked about it, but to name a few, I liked Severus's bitter inner musings, especially during his surprise 'party.' I truly think that is how he would feel about such a thing. I also really liked the metaphor of his need for sunlight as a need for affection. The fact that Hermione already knew he loved her was a nice touch, as well.
Thanks a lot for posting this : )