... For fuck's sake, you just HAD to make the snow mission 200 times harder, didn't you?

Wasn't Moso apparently looking for something and found it? What the hell happened to that? I was half-expecting another necklace for Naruto...

Okay... so apparently he has eternal longevity, not immortality... still, he would eb able to make great use out of the 1st 7 gates.

Wait... Naruto is immortal now right? and he heals all damage to himself rapidly without repercussions right?

Couldn't Naruto technically open the 8th gate and survive? and couldn't he technically just open his gates, tear all his muscles and bones to shreds, let the youki do it's thing, then do it all over again to gain strength and muscle-definition extremely rapidly? And keep doing so until his body has adapted enough that he can have all 8 gates open permanently?

1Why even give him immortality of you are trying to show how ficle life is in naruto.
2. Makeing him half demon is pretty much just an instant power boost. Which i know the clones are basically the same thing but yoi wrote out some of the training so it didn't feel instantaneous and felt like he was actually growing.
3 you keep saying your trying not to be cookie cutter, and you're sorry for someof the cookie cutter stuff you wrote in for the story but you just did like the biggest unoriginal thing (comes in 2nd to the whole abusive childhood mob chasing intro chapter cliche )in naruto fanfic and made him half demon.
4. Sorry i will not continue reading this story. Though i do hope you finish it for your other readers. And keep trying to become better at writing. If you want a recommendation to read some pretty original naruto/other fan fics check out Kenichi618 (he is in my opinion the G.o.a.t. fanfiction writer)

The conversations between Kyuubi and Naruto need to be rewritten. Her tone, vocabulary, and choice of words just don't fit. Perhaps reading up on some well written female characters would help. Naruto here is truly out of character, and not in a good way. Naruto is known for looking for the good in people's actions and having a big heart. He rejects common thought and comes to the core truth of matters despite being slow-minded in canon. Kyuubi is too stiff and long-winded, smirking too much, and does not come off as attractive at all. I liked Haku, am hoping that Anko gets better, and am tolerant of Tenten. Maybe our ideas of what make a woman attractive are far apart.

You have been using the japanese word 'teme' incorrectly. "Teme" is another way of saying 'you', like 'kimi', 'anata', 'anta', 'omae', etc. Try doing a google search or download the jwpce application and look up the definition.

Oh no, not another one who believe that "fanfiction" is the true canon which it isn't. You need to read, real true material of naruto canon and ignore the fanon. I recommend to check on "tvtrope" *fanon* where you can correct what the fandom did wrong, also an true author need to be neutral and not let the emotion get the better of them, and please no bashing. Some of the naruto characters in the fandom where portrayal occ not like in the canon, try your best to do research.

I really wanted to enjoy this story after Naruto went half demon I really did I was having so much fun reading this story your take on the characters were perfect and Naruto was just the right level of skill I was sad when haiku was killed and was hooked. But then you ruined it by making him half demon, from the way you wrought the early chapters I have no doubt you will be able to make it work but it's just not my thing I could have tolerated a Naruto having a. Good relationship with the kyubi but the half demon route just bores me.

I honestly did believe this was going to be one of the best fanfics I've ever read and if you'd have kept the tone from the early chapters it might have been. But you let yourself and I can't bring myself to read past chapter 20. But you did have Naruto react well to find out about his immortality so that's a plus I guess.

Literally only started reading this today and I'm in love with this story, sooooooo good

I get guys not liking guys if your not bi or gay, and I get being teased for having a crush or acting like it. What I don't get is how being gay is insulting to ones sexuality. I liked this fic and was really starting to get into it, but it's sutble homophobia like this that ruins the magic of a well written fic for me and I won't be reading any further. Thank you for the read so far.

"That wasn't very nice Naruto-kun," Tenten said, though she could not help but let the small giggle escape, finding what he had said and the insult on the pair's sexuality to be hilarious."

Epic chapter and fight! This next one should be even better! Wonder if he'll have enough energy to fight Gaara at this rate though.

why can't u just wright everything in english

Why in the world would Orochi allow one of his best and strongest spies to be be found out by actually fighting in the tournament.

So wait Sarutobi still ended up dead? Are you serious? He had a kage and the second strongest junchurriki there. He could've wiped the floor with Orochimaru if he could focus on him alone and not have to worry about the two kages. What the hells the point of all the big flashy changes if you're not even gonna change canon. In the summary it says it'll create a totally different outcome, but I still have yet to see anything change at all. Haku still died, Sarutobi still died, Orochi still got away, nothing changed at all except Naruto getting a couple girlfriends. You even gave yourself two extra kage level fighters and still didn't change anything; that's utterly redundant. Despite the awesome fights, I'm still disappointed in this chapter due to lack of meaningful content.