|Reviews for Poké Rangers: Forever Red|
| Pink Lightspeed Ranger chapter 28 . 7/10/2011
Like the Forever Red episode in Power Rangers Wild Force
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 28 . 3/18/2011
"Um, please comment and critique… it could be of good use."
Well, if you insist.
"...the red ranger zords materialized back to where they were meant to be in the world, no matter the time or space."
Very lame, and dull. You didn't even need to mention what happened to the Zords. Why did that happen? How? You'd have been better off not mentioning them.
You know what the U stands for, right? Unidentified. But his ship was identified.
"The Arcanine Zord disappeared into Kris's Neo Phone"
Wrong in so many ways.
"Orion, Kyle, and Kris were heading back to 2108, while David and Shapp were also getting ready to head back to their own times."
How are they going to do that? They got their because Chronos & Stryker had messed with the dimensions, but now everything's back to normal they're stuck.
"You guys have… really helped save your dimensions from trouble."
They're all from the same Dimension. The Pokémon World. Different times do not equal different dimensions.
"...although I wasn't sure what type of Pokémon you liked."
Growlithe never crossed his mind?
"As Frank opened the Poké Ball, he was surprised to see a fiery pig appear in front of him."
Yeah...it was Mary Sue-ish when Starfighter did it and it still is now. Although you've gone further than he ever did, he never created an entire movie just for his self-insert to be the big hero, outshining the team-up that's been coming for five years.
"The Dimension Holes are ready to go for you guys"
How? Does Frank also now magically have all the powers of Tina Rage?
"Why?" asked Danny.
Uh, because he's in the wrong flaming dimension?
"TV series? You mean…?" asked Jack.
THEY ALL ALREADY KNOW THAT. There was an entire chapter explaining that to them!
""Yeah, Mighty Morphin' Poké Rangers is a TV series in Japan," said Frank."
No it's not, it's a TV series internationally. Poké Sentai is the Japanese version. Of course, some series of Power Rangers have been dubbed back for Japan, but still...
"You know… you remind me of me…"
Not gonna point out how Eddie's based on Frank?
"Hey! The world is saved. I guess you're not dead."
Yeah, Jack would have realised that when he was NOT DEAD. Also, what the hell, Frank didn't go back to the Hub first? What a complete git! Not only that, but he doesn't give Jack the chance to meet his characters, which they all wanted. Why have those lines at all if they come to nothing?
"Jack went to make a cup of tea"
Jack doesn't like tea.
"... his namesake Jack..."
You clearly don't know what namesake means. I am Jack's namesake, not the other way round. The Yellow DW Ranger wasnt named after the Red MM Ranger, it was the other way round.
Liking the foreshadowing.
And of course, drinking...rather glad none of my characters are around now...
And...oh my...really...you're ending this...our big anniversary crossover...with a lame parody of an awful song that everyone will have forgotten about in a few years time?
...And vomit. Great.
Not to mention how incredibly irresponsible that is of Frank. How about all the actors that play the Rangers meeting them, or just any given fan seeing the characters for real? Ridiculous...
So...it's over...final thoughts...
It had an ok, if slow start...I liked the first few chapters, but the recruitment dragged on a bit...when the fighting started towards the end I really got into it, it was actually pretty well written and intense. Then you combined all the Zords and ruined it...but the final fight was great, and you had an incredible plot twist with Frank seemingly dead...then you crapped all over that with such a miserable resolution...and this final chapter...oi, vey...
And that's not even going into all the plot holes and continuity errors.
All in all, it was fun, but it certainly isn't canon.
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 27 . 3/18/2011
Yay for me showing up again. Although I hope the praying comment isn't an allusion to my Christianity. Jack the character is based on me from four years ago, he's completely different, which is why people call him Jack, one of his two closest friends shown in No Place Like Hoenn is someone I've not seen in years, and why the love of his life is someone he's not seen in years. He's not Christian, like I am. If he did have my faith then he'd have been praying that whole time. However, as the character, that's fine, he might make a jokey comment like that.
""Cool, you said tarnation. That's such a British word."
No it's not. I know Bongo's seen this and approved that - perhaps he recommended it, we all know he has differing perceptions of British slang, but I've never heard anyone use that word, ever. Again, maybe people use it where Bongo lives, but the only people I've ever heard it used by are southern American fictional characters, such as Yosemite Sam. American. Not British, in any way.
That said, I might use it personally.
"Jack answered, his next words calm at first, before growing more frustrated."
I'd want to talk to Kyle as much as he would to me, but we'd both appreciate that it wasn't the right time. When it gets down to it, Kyle's serious. I guess you have 19 other characters like that though, huh...nice to have something different.
The point about my name and your Red Ranger's has to be made.
"So, I decided to do a search…"
How? He was dead. And that would be impossible, he'd have to have broken through dimensions.
"...when I found out that you created me, only to then destroy me, it made me angry."
Best. Motive. Ever. Of course, rather similar to another character we both know Yankee (spoilers, of course, to anyone else reading this...), but brilliant. Of course, we already know the character was already evil...but still, nicely done.
""Why did you morph out?" asked Eddie, surprised and worried.
Frank looked at him, not giving an answer because there wasn't one."
That's just stupid. I mean really, REALLY stupid. You can't do that Yankee, that's just pathetic writing. Sorry, but...what? Is it supposed to be impressive? It's fine with a reason, but that's awful...
"... Kyle let out a yelp and covered his head..."
Kyle is anything but a coward.
"GUYS! DON'T INTERFERE!"
Tell me you're not doing this, Yankee. Disney ruined Forever Red by making it all about their current Ranger. Tell me you're not pulling the same move, only far worse as it's your own self-insert character...
"I do believe that I just killed you!"
"Damn you, Yankee Blaze!"
So yeah, you've done it...you've turned this into a giant fanwank/ego trip...but the story can still be saved by this incredible plot twist...
"He could be dead in a matter of minutes if I don't do something, but I don't know what!"
This is actually amazing...seriously dramatic...epic...
"I'm not letting you die," said Jack, "Not today."
Yeah, but what can you do?
"Taking out his Torchic Coin, he placed it in Frank's hand."
"Closing his eyes, he felt a red beam of energy shoot out of the coin, surging through Frank's body."
"Katie watched as Frank's body began to levitate."
"I think the Poké Coins have a power to revive or give people the energy enough to survive."
NO! PLEASE tell me you aren't using such a lame, lousy, cheap, cop-out deus ex machina that you didn't even come up with yourself, but once again, stole from Power Rangers!
"I'm alive… thanks."
NO! You did it...you actually did it...
*Sigh*...one more chapter...then I'll give my final thoughts on the fic as a whole...
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 26 . 3/18/2011
And here's the chapter where this officially stops being canon to Johto...
""Let's do this," said Kris, placing his Neo Phone in the cockpit."
I'm sure I've told you this before but Neo Zords don't have cockpits. Only as Megazords. Otherwise they ride on top of the Zord.
Nice to see the Aerodactyl Zord getting a line or two though.
"Dusclops Zord, power up!"
I was about to comment on how wrong that is. Then I remembered I actually told you to include that...it's the Zord in the past, before it evolved...kudos for getting it right...Golem probably would have been safer, no confusion over the form, but never mind :P
""FOREVER RED FUSION!" yelled Frank."
Yeah...like I said...here's the chapter where this officially stops being canon to Johto...
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 25 . 3/18/2011
"Forest Fire Slash!"
Ow. No. Eddie has Forest Fire Double Attack, which requires him working with someone else. Come on man, I based the Forever Red art on that very attack!
Beyond that, why do they keep needing made-up moves? My Rangers don't use made-up moves, they use real ones, except for the JE specials.
And as I keep on reading...it keeps happening...and always slash...there are other words... "X Scissor Slash"? X-Scissor is already a slashing move, that's just redundant.
"Ready," said Danny, activating his new morpher.
"Alright," said Tara, taking out her ruby key.
"Let's do it," said Felix, opening his Astro Battlizer.
"YES!" both Eddie and Kris said.
"OK!" exclaimed the rangers of Verger.
"Let's do this thing," said Jon and Jake.
All of that was utterly pointless, just wasting time.
Could have at least had Kyle in Superpower...sure he felt like a right lemon with all the other Rangers attacking, him just stood there...
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 24 . 3/18/2011
"I might be a rookie, but you are not going to be a great musician."
Right, but I think in the middle of a fight like this I'd personally rather be able to fight than play music.
"FOREVER RED OVERTECH DYNAMITE ATTACK!"
"What the hell?" asked Groutron.
Yeah...I think my thoughts on that title are voiced in-fic by Groutron already...
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 23 . 3/18/2011
"We were transformed into data cards and never to be found."
Wait, what? Why? The whole point of that happening on Power Rangers was to build up to the LG crossover. If you weren't planning on using them in a crossover, why copy that?
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 22 . 3/18/2011
"Is it me, or do the henchmen of the villains in Johto have better names than the ones in Hoenn?"
HA! Ok, that made me laugh. It also makes me feel somewhat guilty about all my criticisms of you, but fortunately I'm laughing too much to be bogged down by it XD
"Screw him, he's not my creator."
That's a bit harsh...Orion's too polite to say something like that...also, you've got a couple of unnecessary speech marks in there.
Hang on...what's going on with Kris' Legend Armour there? He's summoning it! He ALWAYS has that armour! That's why the art has him wearing the armour, it's not something extra he summons. Even Rocket Red has similar armour. It's like Tommy's chest plates. It has nothing to do with his Legend Staff
And those attacks...is Kris supposed to be using "Flame Wheel Strike"? Why does he have a made-up move?
"I will not allow morons like you to destroy what Chronos and Master Stryker had made!"
Rocket Red wasn't loyal to his creator, why would have be to these guys?
"You've been stopped before"
Yes, more or less, he's been held off, but never actually defeated. Last time Kris saw him Rocket Red was vanishing in blue electricity.
Really? Another made up move?
"Cobra Blue was tougher"
I'm not surprised. Rocket Red would never be defeated so easily. And if he was really struggling, why wouldn't he have used his Battlizer? I've got to agree with Bongo, these must be mere copies of the actual evil Rangers, rather than the real deal. Imperfect copies at that, which would explain the lack of Rocket Battlizer.
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 20 . 3/18/2011
"Chronos stood outside the MegaShip"
On what? Aren't they in space?
"How are we going to defeat them. There's 20 of us, and 2000 of them."
Surely they must have fought more than that before? Doggy Kruger fought 100 in his first fight on his own.
"They're probably stronger than grunts."
Gee, ya think Eddie?
Ok, you've now had two role calls and I was bored before even the first one ended. Largely because I know another is coming up. You only needed to list them all once. Specifying their order here and all those goofy one-liners a few chapters ago add nothing to the plot.
"Jack, do you know what time it is?"
Yeah, that would only really work if the answer is morphin' time. So Kyle probably knows it best, though Frank should still know it thanks to Power Rangers.
"His visor was made of two overlapping triangles; the base was flat, as were the two sides, at right angles to the base, but at the top corners, it looked as though a triangular piece had been cut out."
*Sigh*, second time in the same fic you've gotten that wrong. And wasn't this written & posted AFTER I'd already read the other chapter? And yet neither of you spotted this...
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 19 . 3/18/2011
"Frank nodded, looking at the other rangers"
Kevin, Kris, Eddie & Aliesan must feel so good about being completely ignored.
"...the Human Solar System..."
Which is inhabited by a lot more than just humans.
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 18 . 3/18/2011
"When I wrote it all, I put this in just in case something like this happened."
Really? I don't remember reading about that. Funny.
""Already did," said Frank, taking out some of the coins"
What! So he just had some random off-screen meeting with them at some point, did he? And when? What!
"I'm from Johto. We don't go in for all that."
He's saying he doesn't believe in witchcraft when the first enemy he ever fought was in fact a witch?
How convenient that it produced the exact right number.
Yep, all the Zords combining...I feel queasy...
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 17 . 3/18/2011
Why? He'd probably be in awe of the size of a normal spaceship, his shuttle was about the size of a bus, normal Earth rockets are huge. What's your logic for have him so indifferent?
"...there's a hole in one of the pipes..."
So just to be clear, the antimatter was leaking? Yeah, I'm no particle physicist, but I'm pretty sure that would cause a black hole.
"Last time I checked you're not Claire Springfield."
Just to be clear, does every single Ranger inexplicably know about every other Ranger in the world for this fic?
"Anyway, we're not even close to doing it."
Is there some sort of measurable scale? Does Kyle know how many episodes there are? For all he knows they might stop the Dinosians in the next fight.
Seriously? Katie's continuing the conversation? She's that stupid, risking huge time paradoxes over idle chit-chat? Kyle's comments are slightly understandable as here he personally has had no experience of time travel, he might slips up. Katie should know a bit better what she's doing.
Do you realise how much storage space 1000 torpedoes would require? Seriously, 1000 torpedoes, dozens of Zords including a Zord designed to carry other Zords, this thing must literally be the size of a planet, all filled with empty space for no apparent reason. It's structurally impossible.
And this chapter really throws off the pacing off the story...the whole team is united, ready to head into battle...but first they have to make a bunch of repairs following events that aren't relevant...and all the conversations in this chapter, discussing events that are completely irrelevant to the story that most of your readership have already read about...there's just no need for it...
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 16 . 3/18/2011
"Especially, you, Psycho Red."
What's that supposed to mean? I guess it could be just something from your fic that I don't know about, but it sounds like he's just being valued more highly for no apparent reason.
Indeed, never mind Rocket Red being brought back from the dead, he hasn't even been created yet, he's been called back from the dead and ripped through time.
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 15 . 3/18/2011
"My name is not Frank, honestly."
Not an important detail for him to say at this point, that just confuses the issue.
"None of us blame you for it."
He can't speak for all of them. Furthermore, most of them would have stronger reactions to finding out they're not real people! I know all of my Rangers would be having total breakdowns & existential crises.
"So, then who wrote the Johto series?"
As if any of them would know if he gave them a name? Well, actually, I suppose if he said Jack Farrell...
"...the five worlds and Earth"
Rara Von, Kaku, Syodia...I guess if you mean our Earth and their Earth separately...you're still missing one. Wait...Druidia? ...Oh! Was that the Gold PROO Ranger's home? What does that have to do with this?
""Nice," said Jack"
The destruction of all reality...is nice?
Those grunts may also have been able to attack because they came from that world.
"Excuse Kyle's rudeness."
I understand that this is before the DF finale in Kyle, Kris & Orion's time, yes? Yeah, Then Kyle & Orion have never met, Orion wouldn't be making a comment like that.
"It seems you know this whole ship inside and out."
"I watch a lot of Star Trek,"
Yeah, and also, HE CREATED IT!
"It could defeat Chronos and it does have to deal with all the zords in the bay"
I'm crying already at the thought of what it is...
Food? Shopping? Oh boy...
| Psyduck Ranger chapter 14 . 3/18/2011
FINALLY. Nice to see the proper reaction from Frank to everything going on.