|Reviews for What he deserves|
| D.Bunnie chapter 1 . 10/22/2014
I thought you did a nice job with the set up of this one-shot. I want to compliment your English abilities as well as I didn't realize that it wasn't your native language until I read your notes at the bottom. I'm going to go check your Author page after posting this, because I'm really hoping that I will find that you did a sequel after all...I'd love to see the fallout from the auction the next day!
| cantwalkintheshadows chapter 1 . 10/21/2012
I have to say this was good and your english is very good too.
| Ladii Emelia chapter 1 . 7/19/2012
I enjoyed this.
| h chapter 1 . 1/1/2012
That was really good, and quite funny. Your english is brilliant, way better than my french. Please write a whole story :D xx
| kci47 chapter 1 . 11/18/2011
"Ronald loves Quidditch, he enjoys a good home-cooked meal and playing chess."
This made me laugh out loud. Great story!
| SlytherinHeiress23 chapter 1 . 11/5/2011
Your english is very good. I really like this story. You did a good job. :)
| PhenioxGypsy chapter 1 . 8/8/2011
the english in this is really good i love ur stories
| ingrid chapter 1 . 7/27/2011
c'est super bien écrit et comme toi, j'adore le couple sev/mione! l'équation est parfaite 3
| MiSev chapter 1 . 6/18/2011
Wow, this is a brilliant Bachelor Auction fic! Short and sweet. And you certainly have nothing to worry about with that great sex scene; actually, the only part that seemed a bit odd was the ending where they both fell asleep in front of his bedroom door. If Hermione really wanted to give Snape payback, though, she should have let Trelawney have him ;-)
I did feel a little sorry for Ron and Trelawney, but the bidding wars (or lack of bidding war in Ron's case) were hilarious :-D
The only thing about your fic that indicates you're not a native English-speaking author is the way you offset punctuation from the sentence (Really ? Bachelor : Yes !). In English, question marks, exclamation points, colons, and closing parentheses are not preceded by a space, and opening parentheses are not followed by a space. There were also a couple of instances where « and » were used instead of quotation marks.
The only sentence that didn't make any sense to me is "Ta-ta-ta" - no idea what that means. Also, "prayed Merlin" should be "prayed to Merlin" and "conscious" should be "conscience"
I really enjoyed your writing style. Have you considered writing a prequel about how Severus and Hermione first got together? Please?
| Jesserella chapter 1 . 6/7/2011
This is really good considering English isn't your first language, better even than some who do speak English first, well done. :)
| mom2divas chapter 1 . 5/13/2011
Loved it! Would be interesting to see how everyone reacted to them once their relationship became common knowledge.
|Alexa1993 chapter 1 . 3/15/2011|
| Yuka chapter 1 . 3/12/2011
Amazing! Honestly I could not even tell that you are french! Perfect english! Very hot, and great writing!
| Andy'sGirl4485 chapter 1 . 2/22/2011
This was wonderful! Humorous, engaging and sexy. I wouldn't even know that english wasn't your first language if you hadn't said anything. You have a better grasp of it than most of the people who grew up speaking it. Very well done )
| Van chapter 1 . 2/18/2011
Even though English is not your first language, I thought it was a fantastic story! It's a shame you will be leaving it as a one shot but thumbs up for this one!