|Reviews for My Best Friend|
| reeeeeeeeeeee chapter 1 . 6/13/2013
Oh my gosh! XD Is Orochimaru pedo for Sasori and Itachi? Hahahaha! X’D
| Anaximander Rose chapter 1 . 6/10/2011
o.o I must say this ...
it was epic. You're a very good author :3
| Silverstonedragon chapter 1 . 2/22/2011
I really liked this lemon is fine.I love lemon, both lemon, well yaoi lemon.I'm like Konan, a squealing
| Knight217 chapter 1 . 1/30/2011
Dude that was the shortest lemon I've eva read but funni funni funni funni
| AkatsukiMemberWoolfy chapter 1 . 1/28/2011
Hmmm,a rather interesting story. I'd probably rate it a 7 out of 10 -
I didnt notice any spelling errors, but there were a few past and present tence mistakes, but that's alright -
I feel that you could have probably stretched this story, like by showing what happens when they wake up. I dont really feel that all of the loose ends were tied up, though that's alright since I usually do that XD Lolz
The smut scene I'd give a 5.5/10, but that's alright for a first smut scene - (My first smut scenes weren't that detailed either XD). I know that smut scenes are hard (*giggle*) to write (I personally would rather right plot than smut) and I feel you could improve, but everyone always has room for improvement (even myself) -
Anyway, keep up the writing -
| DeeaE chapter 1 . 1/28/2011
gaved me a nosebleeeeeeeeeed
| MagdalenaCS chapter 1 . 1/25/2011
| pastelstripes chapter 1 . 1/24/2011
This was pretty good. Nicely done, I can't wait to read more of your story's. _
| A Ravens Dream chapter 1 . 1/24/2011
Okay, let's start!
First, I liked the story overall very much :) It had a nice beginning with small smut scene and then Deidara waking up to his brother, which made me laugh :) The beginning did draw menin to the story, and I finished it easily, understanding it all the way through! Good :)
You then moved onto Spike and Delilah. To be honest, I found them an awkward pair. Not bad, but just strange. Delilah seemed to be...very closed minded (referring to the part about where she found out Dean was Bisexual). Spike seems to be very laid back and uncarring, cool with whatever happens. Like, for instance, whn Deidara and Dean walked in on the two on the couch (which made me laugh(: ), he seemed alright with the fact that his girlfriends brothers just walked in and saw them having sex on the couch. Which would have scared me shitless XD on another note about that scene, that's when Delilah seemed more like Spike, and not as... Uptight (not sure if that's the word for it) as before. But we girls do have our mood swings ;)
Things were going good until you hit the school sences. They were rushed and almost hard to follow. Next time slow down and take your time on them, and perhaps skip around with unnessecary bits. There isn't really much sence in pointless talking, is there? ;) An example of the pointless talking would be the part of Sasori's POV at lunch. Where he was talking about Orochimaru give him the "I'm-going-to-rape-you-over-and-over" look. But if you had added more about that later in the story, with meaning, it would have worked.
Next was the part with Delilah and Spike again. This part had me a little confused/dissapointed. When Deidara had mentioned that his sister was going to the doctors, I thought she had already. I had thought she was pregnant XD Haha, I was worried about that part XD Then when it said that Spike had left her, and that was the only reason she was crying, I was a bit dissapointed. But then again, she hadn't gone to the doctors yet, and I was like, "Maybe there's still hope!" XD Haha, that made me laugh a bit X3
Then it was party time! This is the part I though was most rushed. When Deidara arrived at Sasori's house, the whole thing was already set up. I knew that there were a lot people there to help, but it still puzzled me. And then that Hidan was already drunk XD that didn't surpirse me at all! I was like, "Haha, I KNEW he'd be drunk before Deidara got there!" Anyways XD I thought that Itachi and Kisame, who I guessed were already naked in the pool, part was good. It seemed natrual that he would go swimming. But with the short distance that Deidara walked, maybe he just went out there so he and Itachi would get some?
The part where Pein and Konan were in the bedroom: It was a good little bit of information. I hate when my parents are like Konans :O So I would get drunk and have sex, too XD
Hidan and Kakuzu: Good job, Hidan! You finally got Sexy Stitches Man in your pants! ;D
Tobi and Zetsu: Have you forgoten them? They said their hello's (I think) and then dissapeared. O_o maybe they took a room, too?
Sasori and Deidara: :) The smut scene was good! Very nicely done :D but it was rushed very badly D: Sasori closed the door, and BAM! Hot man sex! XD
It was rushed. I did, however, expect Sasori to randomly kiss Deidara, and for Deidara to respond, but not for that to just rush off into them fucking. o_O I would have hoped there was a bit of conversation in that little part. And when they said they loved each other, it made me smile. :) but you would think that Deidara wouldn't have just said it like that. Same with Sasori. Deidara hadn't thought or made any indications that he was in love with Sasori. The same thing with Deidara. He just acted like he was a friend, and that's that.
One last thing that I forgot: the part with Moon. It was unneeded. I saw no point in it whatsoever, and it confused me DX
Overall, the story was actually very good, and I hope my review doesn't sound to mean :( I didn't want it to sound that way, for it was a very good Fic. and I enjoyed it very much :)