Reviews for The Mouse of Konoha
RedRangerBelt chapter 9 . 6/21/2011
What DID Naruto get that's got him so excited? Why can he only use it once per day? Is the Hokage ever going to find out that Naruto knows the shadow clone jutsu? What other jutsu does he know, aside from regular clone, substitution, and transformation? How old is Naruto right now? When will he start learning real jutsu?
deitarionSSokolow chapter 9 . 6/12/2011
Excellent story so far. It's really rare to see a fic which explores young Naruto and even rarer to see one which doesn't quickly timeskip to present and you do it beautifully.

I'm definitely looking forward to seeing more of this.
Kind Fearless Leader chapter 9 . 6/12/2011
Have to give a negative one. I've sorta lost interest in this fic from the direction it has taken recently and somewhat the lack of timeskips involved in putting forth such direction.

It began with a very interesting take of a very young Naruto finding a way to survive through trading and fixing broken goods. Cute. I really liked. It pulled Anko in and had her teach him things, also very cute.

Still though, even with the disguises and stealing some of the academy jutsu through trading with older friends, he generally came across as just possibly learning some advanced stuff for his age.

Now it seems with each new chapter, he's learning things that would be advanced versus the previous chapter's introduction, for what seem to be shakier and shakier reasons. The Kage Bunshin is something that was hard for him to learn at twice his current age and is supposed to be an extremely hard jutsu...and it's just rolled out. His disguise skills have already seem to have risen to a very high level. He's being taught the hebi style. He rarely botches things or wanders around chilidishly.

Somewhere along the line, Sarutobi's "Hey we shouldn't be teaching a six-seven year old jutsu" already got completely tossed out the window. Its a pity as the same set drawn out over 4-5 years with entering the academy could indeed be very neat. Instead, it's drawing a picture of 'Why Bother' with the academy setting and frankly his whole age group. Instead of starting way behind, or starting with an interesting/colorful education that you sorta had setup before, he's going to start with a 'so why are you bothering to teach that? I learned it like 4-5 years ago and seriously, all you guys suck at taijutsu except maybe Sasuke and Hinata.'

He's just started leaping in collected skills far outside his age group and he's pretty much never failing with them save for an opportunity to get a vastly superior option. It's just getting harder and harder to picture him alongside the rest of the cast at some point. I see you're finally bringing in Sakura, but with the leg up, I'd half expect Naruto to end up in Tenten's year or even a year before that.

Basically it feels at this point like he's moving forward in a void of context and at this point it's starting to become harder to believe his declared age. Because of it, while a lot of the scenes are still cute, my eyes just glaze over him just casually moving up further and further the skills ladder relative to his theoretical peers. Heck, we're having him learning post-academy tier ninjutsu before Konohamaru is even born. Instead of a spotty education that's real strong in some points, he's sneaking in for proper tutoring now alongside his other training.

I like an awesome protagonist, but it just feels like it'd be a whole lot more plausible if these were spread out alongside Naruto getting to grow up some. Instead they now feel like 'here's your new toy for today, Naruto.'

Anyhow, good luck with future chapters. I still rather like your Win some, lose some series, but I this just stretched past my ability to follow the fantasy.
Tahari chapter 5 . 6/10/2011
Correction: Its kawarimi not kawirimi.
Batamut chapter 6 . 6/10/2011
There is too many evidence to suggest that Henge isn't a ninjitsu, after all Gamabunta asked Naruto to use it against the one-tailed beast which wouldn't of worked if it was only an illusion.

The following is extract on what is believed the Henge is:

This jutsu allows the user to transform either themselves or another object into the appearance of another person, animal, or object. This is one of the basic jutsu taught at the Konohagakure Ninja Academy, and most shinobi know this jutsu. The transformation technique is considered to be among the more difficult E-ranked techniques, since it requires constant emission of chakra while mentally maintaining the form. On top of that, the user would be, most likely, interacting with the environment. This puts mental strain on an inexperienced ninja. Thus the best way to determine if it is indeed a transformation is to cause this strain upon the user; though this is of course not always successfu
The Celtic Kid chapter 9 . 6/9/2011
Absolutely amazing. Little slow but mostly because of plot devel. You've addressed that and I understand completely. Just keep up the good work and I'll be happy :)
molyneux chapter 1 . 6/8/2011
i love the story and can't wait for future updates. this story is deserving of having more reviews. keep up the good work.
ranma hibiki chapter 9 . 6/8/2011
waitwaitwaitwait!...i thought sakura was in naruto's class!

O_o wtf is going on! did i miss something? *shrugs* eh, i'll figure it out later..like in later updates

P

so naruto the mouse has someone who deserves a prank. wont ask what they did but i can't WAIT to see how he gets them back! *evil laugh*
Mikra chapter 9 . 6/7/2011
This was brilliant, as always :)
BlackRoseFire chapter 9 . 6/7/2011
Oh this next chapter promises to awesome. I really loved the way that you had Naruto figure out the kanpekina henge, i have never really though about how he had formed the fuuma shuriken henge for the wave arc. I really can't wait until he gets to the acedemy it will be epic (for the readers anyway lol).
sapphireplusle chapter 9 . 6/6/2011
lol, i must have been tripping or you just updated really fast, i coulda sworn that this ended on chapter 4... lol oh well.

I will miss anko sensei and i like the introduction of the hebi style, i can't wait to see if he develops his own or if he sticks to hebi.

surprised me with the bunshin technique i thought he would have found out that he's using too much chakra thus having him focus on control alot more but discovering kage bunshin so soon was a surprise. (lol good job with that.)

heh, kage bunshin mouse information broker anyone?

this story has so many outcomes. i love this guessing game.

keep up the good work and update soon. :)
imgonnadie chapter 9 . 6/6/2011
Excellent chapter.
Ebrius chapter 9 . 6/6/2011
All right! Excellent chapter.
KGB chapter 9 . 6/6/2011
Great story. I like the big chapters.

I've never seen Naruto as a mousy type, but you make the mouse cool.

About the question at the end, Mouse apparently encountered something after going to the internal signal. I only know two big happenings in the village in Naruto's youth, but it's a few years to late for Hinata's kidnapping and a year or so too early for Uchiha massacre. It could be unrest happening before the Uchiha massacre, probably because the Uchiha are stuck up. He bought some pills, either energy boosting pills, to make more clones for a massive prank. Or something like a light poison, making people puke, to put in someone's food.

While Naruto's clones can henge in basically anything without knowing it inside out, Naruto himself can not without knowing the internal organs, etc. He won't learn that from kage bunshin, because they don't have that before and after transforming. It'll be interesting to see how Naruto is going to train 'SAID' using henged animal clones and upon which secrets (read: blackmail material) he'll stumble doing it.
yapook chapter 9 . 6/6/2011
Nice, is the next chapter going to be Naruto's first "real" prank on the poor citizens of Konoha?
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